Instead of threesome, it should have been called "Hilary Duff kisses a girl." Here's what happened:

A fully clothed Lezzie Lizze Maguire smooched The Boring Dude. Then she puckered up with The Chick Nobody Likes. Then The Boring Dude snogged The Chick Nobody Likes. A beat. A look. Cut to: An illuminated phallic symbol. That was it. In its entirety. I'm not saying I wanted more, but there was so much hype!

Oh, actually, there was more:
Three people SLEEPING in one bed? The SCANDAL.

These desperate ploys to draw viewers (Tyra's stint!) are wearing as thin as this season's storylines. What I liked about the books (and the show… at first) was the portrayal of incredibly wealthy, privileged NYC high school students with messy, complicated lives… the same, universal teen angst seen in classics like The Catcher In The Rye and Sixteen Candles. The characters proved that money can't buy you love, security, a good seat in the cafeteria (or the Met steps). But watered-down claptrap like the "threesome" — and the fact that most of the characters aren't in high school anymore cheapens the experience.

Also? Threesomes are so '90s.

Earlier: Is Gossip Girl The Best Show Ever? It Could Be, If They'd Let It