Crotch-Watchers Beware: Calvin Klein Jeans "Enhance" Dudes' JunkS

The New York Observer's Michael Miller checked out the new Body by Calvin Klein Jeans, which have a "body-defining fit for an enhanced profile." In other words: A padded fly.

Bustles, corsets, Wonderbras, that padded-booty underwear from Frederick's Of Hollywood — women have been dealing with figure-enhancing apparel for centuries. But the codpiece has come (heh) and gone. So it's interesting that Calvin Klein is trying to appeal to a man's vanity — or insecurity — when that's usually territory marketers use on women.

Sometimes stuff like this is like alcoholism: The first step is admitting you have a problem. You have to be willing to be labeled as "that" kind of person. It's easier with drugstore items like conditioner for "dry and damaged" hair or cleanser for "oily" skin. You can march up to the counter owning your issues, like, yeah, I'm dry and damaged and oily, so what?

But some men place so much importance on their junk, you've got to wonder if this is enabling, in a way. Or telling: Wouldn't you automatically assume there's a problem in that area?

Miller spoke with Ray Lopez, a Macy's sales guy. "When I first tried them on, it was like, ‘Whoa! Do other people notice this?'" Ray says. "You feel more confident. You have people who wear the skinny jean, and the only thing you see is the bulge. These work with the whole body." Miller, of course, tried the jeans on:

They were a breakthrough! Such comfort, such support! And yes, my confidence was bigger! It looked bigger, at least.

Ah, yes: The illusion of change. Something push-up bra, Spanx and makeup-wearing women are quite familiar with. Welcome to our world.

Something Is Getting Between Him and His Calvins
[NY Observer]