Madonna was carried onto Letterman's stage by hockey players last night, an event that ended up being the high point of her uncomfortable and typically arrogant interview. She just doesn't seem very... likable.

Madonna's rare public appearance was to promote her latest album, Celebration. After being carried out on the aforementioned shoulders of hockey players (a stunt that was supposed to be ironic? Yes? No? No idea), she complained that her fingers were pinched in the process. In the clip above, she talks about the two meanings of the name "Madge" (and settles on the one that means "majesty") and compares her eight year marriage to "The Bush Years."

After a stunt in which Letterman ordered Her Majesty a New York pizza (unbelievably, her first, because she's "not a cheese person"), Dave asked Madonna about her daughter and parenting in general:

Surprised by my reaction to this entire interview (I thought Madonna came off as completely out of touch, watching herself in the monitors the whole time and rarely acknowledging the audience, and totally ungraceful, dissing the father of her children), I asked a friend what she thought of Madonna. "I'm neutral," she said, before reconsidering: "Well, I hate Gwyneth Paltrow so I guess I hate Madonna by association." Both women have chosen, for whatever reasons (and possibly wise ones) to remove themselves from American society while still counting on our interest for their paychecks. And on the rare occasions when they deign to appear before us, it always seems so obvious that they don't want to be here. Madonna would have been better received last night if she'd dropped the royal act and respected her audience enough to at least try to sound interested. She is, after all, in America now. None of this matters when choosing whether or not to buy her album, but again, she just isn't likable.