Woman Fries, Eats Ex's Goldfish • Judge Caught Masturbating At HearingS

• Texas police say that a Houston-area woman attempted to get back at her ex by frying their pet goldfish and eating them. Police say it's a civil matter and no charges will be filed. •

• A new report reveals a steep climb in the number of women smoking roll-up cigarettes. The Times mentions famous smokers Kate Winslet, Emma Thompson and Helena Bonham-Carter as forerunners of the new trend. • According to a study funded by the U.S. National Institutes of Health and the Boston Obesity Nutrition Research Center, every one point increase in a woman's B.M.I. decreases her chances of surviving until age 70 by 12%. The study examined more than 17,000 female nurses over the course of 30 years. • A California woman has settled her lawsuit with the doctors who refused to artificially inseminate her due to her sexual orientation. She says the the doctors treated her with hormones, but refused to inseminate her, saying that their beliefs prevented them from doing so. • A Philadelphia Eagles fan says she was refused entrance into the stadium on Sunday because she was wearing a T-shirt that read "Losers fight pitbulls." The security guards told her she would not be allowed in unless she turned her Michael Vick-hating tee inside out. • Bassist/composer Meshell Ndegeocello on her new album, Devil's Halo: "I love the myth of the devil: the fallen angel who became jealous. So the symbolism of the Devil's Halo for me is that there are gray areas in music and life." • A Chicago auto dealership is accused of sexual harassment after its salesmen allegedly made abusive remarks to female workers and called female customers "dingbats." • Jennie Litvack, goddaughter to jazz legend Dizzy Gillespie, talks to NPR about her relationship with Dizzy and her role as the shofar-blower for her synagogue. • A 10-year-old British girl recently put her grandma up for auction on eBay. She started the bidding at 99p, and described her grandmother as "annoying and moaning a lot." Although there were quite a few offers, eBay removed the ad, saying "obviously, we have rules about the selling of people." • A North Carolina man is accused of circumcising two of his sons at home with no anesthetic, and beating their mother when she tried to protect one of them. This model family man apparently has two wives and 14 children. • The Broadway production of David Mamet's "Oleanna" — about a professor accused of sexual harassment — will be accompanied by a talkback session with Anucha Browne Sanders, who sued the New York Knicks and Madison Square Garden for sexual harassment in 2007. Also on tap for a talkback: Montel Williams. • A photograph showing naked, 10-year-old Brooke Shields (originally taken, disturbingly, for the Playboy publication Sugar n' Spice), has been removed from a Tate Modern exhibition because British police say it could violate obscenity laws. • Joe Biden says the passage of the Violence Against Women Act, which he sponsored 15 years ago, was "his proudest accomplishment," and that the next step is to pass such a measure internationally. • A Kansas City judge has been accused of using foul language and masturbating while in the midst of a divorce hearing. Kimberly Ireland claims that Judge Kevin P. Moriarty asked her about her underwear and her sex life. Moriarty responded to Ireland's accusations by interfering with her divorce proceedings and launching an investigation into her private life. •