The comments of the day:

Best Comment Of The Day, in response to Viagara Ice Cream To Be Sold At Selfridges: "What happens if your ice cream stays hard for longer than 4 hours?" You say: "You have to soda jerk off." • Best Comment Of The Day, in response to Sign Of The Times: "After sitting out in the sun with their sign, Pat and Sheila went home, got their Social Security checks out of the mailbox and then went to CVS to get their prescriptions, paid for by Medicare." We say: While at CVS, they stocked up on markers and gave teenagers buying condoms disparaging looks.

Reminder: Best and Worst comment nominations should be sent to Hortense at commenters@jezebel.com.

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