Adding to the debate over whether Regina Benjamin is "too fat" to be U.S. Surgeon General is the most qualified Fox News pundit ever: Michael Karolchyk, owner of a Denver gym that specializes in "getting clients in shape for sex."
Karolchyk wore a "No Chubbies" t-shirt on Fox — yes, really — and told host Neil Cavuto that Benjamin is "50 pounds overweight, she is obese." When Cavuto questioned the seemingly arbitrary figure, Karolchyk replied, "I have a lot of experience with this." Sounds like he should work for US Weekly, gauging celebs' weight just by looking at photographs. In fact, he might have to — because he's basically the male Tracy Anderson (minus the celebrity clients, plus some real silly hand gestures).
According to a profile in the magazine 5280, Karolchyk idolizes Holden Caulfield and, in his heyday, gave out condoms as business cards and enjoyed filming commercials where he slammed pies into overweight women's faces. He used to run the Anti-Gym (link NSFW, due to pics of a guy taking of lingerie with his teeth, the word "sex" in huge letters, obnoxious music, and being generally horrible), which boasts that "With live DJs, cage dancers, and our elite co-ed Ravish Room, Anti-Gym boasts the hottest facilities and clientele in Denver." And which, in fact, we've written about before! Moe said,
The Ravish Room turns out to be a sauna that admits only members who have reached a sufficiently low body mass index, but you also have to be screened to so much as join his gym, where motivational techniques include having cupcakes hurled at you on the treadmill
But Karolchyk apparently hurls cupcakes no more — his gym/sex-cliche horror show was shut down in January for nonpayment of "at least $184,078.76" in taxes. After the shutdown, stacks of documents about Karolchyk's clients — including not just their names and credit card numbers but also personal information about their cancer diagnoses and helpful descriptors like "fatty lazy" and "lazy piece of shit" — were found in a dumpster. Karolchyk swears he didn't dump his clients' personal information in such an unsecured location, but since he's the kind of guy who describes his customers as "fatty lazy," we somehow doubt he has all that much consideration for them.
Karolchyk says (based, again, on the scientific method of Watching Video Footage) that Benjamin is "lazy" and makes "poor food choices." He asks if we'd want "the head of the Fed Reserve to be a guy in a cardboard box" or "Michael Jackson's doctor" as the head of the DEA. By the same token, we don't want a cupcake-hurling, tax-evading, self-described "chubbyist" to tell us who's qualified to be Surgeon General.
Fox News: Surgeon General Too Fat [Talking Points Memo]
Fox Lashes Health Pick As 'Too Fat to Serve' [Newser]
Anti-Gym's Michael Karolchyk Gets Flayed In Channel 4 Report [Westword]
'Anti-Gym' Personal Records Found In Dumpster [Channel 4 News, Denver]
Anti-Gym [Official Site]
How Much Does Anti-Gym's Michael Karolchyk Owe To The IRS? [Westword]
This Man Thinks You're Fat