Chalk another one up for the PR team: Angelina Jolie was rated the "#1 lesbian heroine" - because I guess actual lesbians need not apply?
The "One Poll," whatever that is, asked "2600 lesbians " who their hero was. No word on whether they were given free choice or given a list of "popular entertainers," although some of the picks have us leaning towards the latter. Anyway, the world's prom queen, Angelina Jolie, was rated #1, "due to her figure, physique and fashion sense. " One more hurdle cleared in the path to world domination?
The entire "top 20" list is as follows:
1. Angelina Jolie
4. Martina Navratilova
5. Ellen DeGeneres
6. Kylie Minogue
7. Lady Gaga
8. Annie Lennox
10. Germaine Greer
11. Liza Minnelli
12. Gwen Stefani
14. Janet Jackson
15. Tori Amos
16. Britney Spears
17. Cyndi Lauper
18. Scarlet Johansson
19. Sarah Jessica Parker
20. Dolly Parton
Listen, we defend any lesbian's right to lionize an asinine group of people - and hell, who doesn't love Dolly? - but we must confess to a little surprise that a list of lesbian heroes contained only two, you know, lesbians. And no offense to any of them, but we find it a little hard to believe that Sarah Jessica Parker, Liza, and ScarJo - what, no Katy Perry? - beat out the following:
- Rachel Maddow. C'mon now. Maybe it's a British poll, but we like to think some things transcend a common language. Cher did! And maybe more straight women would sleep with Angelina (since these polls are always forcing them to pull a Katy Perry), but more smart straight women would choose Maddow. And wait for it - we'd also hang out with her platonically!
- Wanda Sykes. Out, proud, ballsy, funny? We see your Britney Spears (wtf?) and raise you.
-Sandra Bernhard. You want icons? We personally think she should knock Madonna down several rungs.
-Beth Ditto. Pink's fine and all, but here's an actual activist who also happens to write her own music, be a fashion icon, and rock.
-Jeanette Winterson. We're glad Germaine Greer made the cut, but Winterson's that rare thing, a smart bestseller.
And if we want classics, sure you need Ellen and Martina, but seriously, people - what about Melissa Etheridge?
(Oh, wait, Angelina Jolie's flack just appeared at the door with a gun. We take it back.)
Angelina Jolie Is Ultimate Lesbian Heroine [Telegraph]