"Fertility Is Women's Sacred Birthright"

We've long been infuriated and fascinated by the creepy "Our Bodies, Ourselves-style First Response Fertility ads.

The moment we pass from womanhood to motherhood, we cross a threshold. For many of us, that step is filled with wish and worry, hope and how, wonder and when. Fertility is a woman's most sacred birthright. For over twenty years, First Response has been there, helping women answer the most important questions of their lives. Now we bring you new help: the First Response fertility test for women.

From the fertility goddess mumbo-jumbo to the flowing silk robes to the warm color palette to the concerned croon of the narrator, this ad - which at the end of the day, is for something you pee on - is a doozy. As a reader wrote in to Sociological Images, what's with the distinction between "womanhood" and "motherhood?" (While I'm more inclined to ascribe it to the "middle school poetry" school of writing, he's right that it does have the ancillary effect of drawing a distinction between mothergood and sexuality.) "Hope and how?" "Sacred birthright?" Um, The Mists of Avalon called, they want their copy back. As for me, if I buy something like this I think I'd like one that a)tells me what it does and b) doesn't seem like it's being marketed to facilitate the Rhythm Method.

Motherhood As Women's "Most Sacred Birthright" [Sociological Images]
Introducing the NEW! First Response® Fertility Test For Women