The array of whimsical toppers at Ascot's Opening Day, the Oscars of Hats, led us to inaugurate the first annual Arbitrary Hat Awards, cause who doesn't like being gratuitously judgey?
Pippi Longstocking Memorial Award for Excellence in Braiding.
Lifetime Achievement Award
The Creationist Award for Excellence in Literalism
The Edgard Allen Poe Memorial Award
The Gamfield Award in Chimney Sweeping Possibilities
The Frank Lloyd Wright Award for Excellence in Form and Function
The Martha Stewart Award for Excellence in Ribbon-Curling.
The Alice Waters Award in Locavore Excellence
The Ray Krok Convenience in Snacking Award
The Pulitzer Award for Hard-Hitting Timeliness in Chapeaux
The Obligatory Award For All Royal Cousins in a Position to Introduce People to Princes, Even If That's Not as Exciting as That Used to Be Award
The Clark Kent Award fro Excellence in Crappy Disguises
The Inbred Talent for Looking Natural in Top Hat Award
The Henry Higgins' Mother Award for Wearing a Pink Hat to Ascot.
[Images via Getty]