I related so much to Janice on last night's I'm a Celebrity… Being in a weird place, with a weird hole-in-the-floor latrine and no access to coffee, she's been constipated for a week — and can't stop talking about it.
I've been there before, and I know that once you're that full of shit, you have to get it out in another way, so you just talk about it to anyone who will listen. While they were all sitting around the campfire, the group decided to have a love fest and talk about who their favorite person in camp was and why. When they got to Janice's turn she said, "I love you all. I gotta try to go take a shit."
And while she has constipation of the butt, she has diarrhea of the mouth.