"Fat Age" Calculator: Baloney

Do I get sick of reading "fat," "overweight" and "plus size" stories everyday? Yes. But how could I resist the Mirror's taunting headline, "Find Out What Your Secret Fat Age Is"?

Mostly, I was intrigued because I'd never even heard of a friggin "fat age." But. According to Lloyds Pharmacy, the average British woman has eaten 92 years worth of chips (what we call French fries), chocolate and cakes by the age of 50. Lloyds devised a fat age calculator, which asks you for your age and consumption habits. Lloyds admits:

"Fat Age" is not a clinically recognised term. This calculator is simply designed to give you a rough idea of whether you are eating too much fat or saturated fat. The calculator assumes that what you tell us about your dietary intake has changed little during your adult years since you turned 18.

In other words, it's not entirely accurate! Still, Jackie Stephens, 50, is told by the Mirror that her "fat age" is 138, because she eats lots of cheese and butter.

But what was interesting to me was that I discovered that my "fat age" is a good 7 years younger than my chronological age, due to the fact that I eat a lot less cheese, butter and red meat than I used to — because I now live with my boyfriend, who is vegan. Just for fun, I plugged in some numbers — regarding pizza, burgers and chicken — that represent how I ate before we met, and my "fat age" leapt up to one year above my real age. So: Since the calculator assumes I have eaten the same way since I turned 18, the original results were incorrect; but then again, so are the second set of results, since I'm not eating the way I used to. Yes, it's great that I took a moment out of my day to think about fat and saturated fat consumption; but seriously? The "fat age" calculator is a thick hunk of baloney.

Find Out What Your Secret Fat Age Is [Mirror]
Fat Age Calculator [Lloyds Pharmacy]