• Sarah Palin is going to skip this weekend's White House Correspondents Dinner because some town in Alaska flooded and she needs to appear like she's committed to this "governing" thing. [Politico]

• Michelle Obama knows the difficulties of maintaining one's work-life balance as a working mom, but (jokingly) said that it would be helped by everyone getting a full-time staff. [Washington Post]
• Equally difficult? Getting the Kindle to pronounce "Barack Obama." It currently refers to him at "Black Alabama." Can we live in a post-racial society if even our robot overlords voices are racist? [NY Times]
• In an article that Kindles around the country would mispronounce, Barack Obama announced his plans to increase funding at the FDA. [Reuters]
• He is not, however, going to fund needle exchange programs because that's condoning drug abuse in the same way that providing condoms to people promotes promiscuity! [Huffington Post]
• Pat Robertson has announced that gay marriage will lead to the molestation of children. [ThinkProgress]
• Whoa: Even Ann Coulter thinks Bill O'Reilly is a sexist piece of shit. [ThinkProgress]
• The economy is still fucked, as 10 banks failed the Administration's stress tests. [BBC]
• Unemployment is almost at 9 percent now. [NY Times]
• But Dick Cheney doesn't think Republicans should change a thing! [ThinkProgress]
• Orrin Hatch will vote against Judge Sonia Sotomayor if Obama nominates her to the Supreme Court because she had the gall to point out that lots of laws — like the Miranda Law, say — were actually made by the courts. Apparently acknowledging the obvious is too liberal. [Politico]

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