• This Week In Tabloids: Babies, Bisexuals & Tim Gunn With His Pants Down

    Welcome back to Midweek Madness, in which assistant Margaret and I search for real "news" in the weekly tabloids. Step inside for free-swingin', AC/DC stories from Us, In Touch, Life & Style, Ok! and Star.


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    Send an email to Dodai, the author of this post, at dodai@jezebel.com.

    Ok!
    "Real Sizes Revealed."
    Guess what? Most stars are thin! Between a size 0 and size 4. The highest dress size number on this spread is a 6/8: Mariah Carey. Brooke Shields wears a jean size 29. Really hard-hitting stuff. Moving on: Jessica Biel is threatening to break up with Justin Timberlake; she was overheard saying on a phone, "I'm sick and tired of his bullshit." Although she could have been talking about her agent, or a dog. Anyway, Justin "craves guy time" and is "constantly flirting." There are two pages on Bethenny from Real Housewives, who wears a bikini and talks about her diet book. Lastly, Tim Gunn is photographed with his pants down (Fig 1). It's sort of adorable, and due to his avuncular demeanor, it's also sort of weird. He says: "I haven't been on a date in 26 years." Awww. But then he says: "It might sound selfish, but I am very happy being alone."
    Grade: F, upgraded to F+ for Tim Gunn (broken locks)

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