The fall/winter collection Alexander McQueen presented yesterday in Paris was delightfully ridiculous: perfectly tailored leather sheaths; glittery hooded dresses; ladylike houndstooth severely cut; a feathered dress with cocoon-like eggshell collar. Plus! Soda-can rollers.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

Ignore the trashcan lid hat and focus instead on the amazing quilted fabric, if you can.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

The styling is purposely horrifying. Don't let it scare you!

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

Instead, check out this gorgeous glittery number which has Grace Jones's name all over it.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

Thou shalt not cross the lady of the house! (That jacket is exquisitely cut, by the by.)

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

It's raining, it's pouring, McQueen is never boring.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

You can admire the workmanship in this quilted coat, while still asking yourself who the hell would wear it.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

Ankle-snappers! If you loved the shoes at Nina Ricci then these may seduce you.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

The undisputed queen of Fraggle Rock.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

Boots which look like stretched-out shoes with spats: Suessian.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

As promised: Soda can hair rollers.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

A new fairy tale: The Swan and The Raven.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

Uh, make that The *Sad* Swan. Look at this way: If you go to the opera and get sleepy, you have your own feathered nest upon which to rest.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

Here's what you're supposed to glean from this ensemble: He designed a silhouette with strong shoulders, nipped waist and exaggerated hips. Here's what you will remember: Bob Marley collar.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

Not recommended for transatlantic trips; you're definitely going to set off the metal detector and the TSA will surely force a strip search.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

Behind the Iron Maiden styling is a really, really beautiful portrait-collar dress.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

Love the twisted, warped houndstooth!

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

Will we see this geometric red confection on the red carpet?

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

More tweaked houndstooth, with birds. This gown is gorgeous…

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

The genius is in the details, like the spiral effect on the hip, and the billowing, cloud-like skirt.

Alexander McQueen Fall/Winter 2009: Derelicte In Wonderland

I mean seriously? This is a woman who is going places.

[All images via AP.]