It's Wednesday, so this must be Midweek Madness, your weekly tabloid roundup. The mags are all over the place this week: Katie Holmes' embryo; Travolta's tragedy; secrets of a White House mom.
Life & Style
"Twins Finally Revealed!"
This story is basically a two-page spread that contains the same photographs as our Snap Judgment of Angelina, Brad, Pax, Zahara and the twins from Tuesday. Moving on: Britney is freaking out because some other chick is taking care of her kids: Kevin and his new girlfriend Victoria Prince took little Jayden and Sean P on a trip to a snowy mountain town. There are pictures of Victoria comforting Brit's boys, and of everyone sledding and playing in the snow. In an "exclusive" interview with Ray J Norwood, who's getting a reality show on MTV (to replace Flavor of Love) he explains his relationship with Whitney Houston: "We always hang out. We'll probably hang out in the future, you know what I mean?" Paris Hilton's gmail account was hacked; an imposter asked Paris's friends to promote an unknown website. She plans to contact the FBI, but she's just so busy. There's a four page story in which Larry Birkhead explains the way he'll tell Dannielynn how her mom died, but it's pretty tasteless. He says: "I tell her this cute fairytale. There was a handsome young man named Larry who met a beautiful woman named Anna at the Kentucky Derby… I also use puppets to tell her about how we met." Lastly, this week in Dr. Rey's Casebook, Madonna should have an arm lift, because her skin is starting to sag (Fig. 1), and Rihanna's 28-year-old "taut arms" would fit Star Jones (46) "perfectly." (Fig. 1a)
Grade: F (crotch rot)