Spotted: Luke Wilson Getting A Lap Dance On His Bottle Rocket

  • Luke Wilson is back in Austin, Texas for the holidays, and he's spending them at the Yellow Rose gentlemen's club. Ol' Luke was "getting lap dances and rocking out" to heavy metal. [Page Six]
  • Ostensibly the same thieves who stole millions worth of Paris Hilton's jewelery last week have also robbed Erin Wasson. Wasson was unfortunately home during the robbery. Like Hilton, she had also left her door unlocked."Tens of thousands of dollars of jewelry and designer clothing," were stolen from Wasson's abode, "including pieces by Alexander McQueen, Ann Demeulemeester, Dior, Givenchy and William Rast." A prominent publicist living nearby was also robbed. [Page Six]
  • Speaking of Paris, rumor is that she and Benji Madden are back on. Says a source, “They are completely still hooking up." [The Superficial]
  • This is getting completely ridiculous: apparently at the (probably staged) Los Angeles courthouse ceremony, Spencer refused to say "I do" after Heidi had already said it. Because, according to E!, "In an apparent act of consideration for his prettier half, the bearded one decided to wait. The reason given? The two plan to create a fantasy ceremony for Heidi that would include patching things up with her family, who were disappointed to have been shut out of the couple's ring exchange." [E! Online]
  • Trouble in J.Lo's perfect marriage? Both Jennifer and Marc Anthony have recently been photographed without their wedding rings. Also: a source tells Page Six that J.Lo sent her assistant on tour with Marc to make sure he didn't stick his willie where it wasn't supposed to go. Hmm! [Page Six]
  • Jeremy Piven's Speed the Plow castmates aren't buying his "sushi defense" — that he left the show because of Mercury poisoning due to excessive sushi intake. After the first performance sans-Piven, former co-star Raul Esparza told the audience, "Today was the first time I really enjoyed playing this show. I hope you weren't expecting a big TV star." Damn, yo. [NYM]
  • Apparently the hand injury Shia LaBeouf sustained in his DUI car crash earlier this year is fairly serious, much more so than has been admitted in the past. “Shia’s tendons had fused together, and right after the accident there was talk of a partial amputation," a source tells the Daily News. Good thing he's an actor and not any other job where he'd actually have to suffer the consequences: the writers for the Transformers sequel wrote his injury into the plot. [NYDN]
  • Like girlfriend Lindsay Lohan before her, Sam Ronson was hospitalized over the weekend for "exhaustion." Some are speculating that "exhaustion" is actually code for "depression" while others are speculating that "exhaustion" actually means "coke bender." She's already out of the hospital and feeling better. [NYM, Jossip]
  • Revolutionary Road director Sam Mendes on filming his wife Kate Winslet doing Leonardo DiCaprio: "a profoundly weird experience…[I had to watch from another room and shout] 'Leo, don't bang her head so hard against the kitchen cabinets…Could you not do it for so long this time?'" [Page Six]
  • How much does it cost to wrangle Britney Spears? $16,125, according to a judge. That's the amount of Britney's money her dad, Jamie, will be given per month to continue taking care of his daughter's financial affairs. Her brother Bryan will receive $200,000 for the things he did for Brit before his father was named official conservator. [TMZ]
  • Courteney Cox says that divorce from husband David Arquette isn't something she'd ever consider. "I don't know what the future's going to hold, but divorce isn't really an option," Cox says. She says the couple attends counseling to work on their issues. “Therapy helps us. It's so easy to grow apart; marriage takes work. I suppose you can work it out by talking to each other — I would just prefer to have a referee, it reminds us why we're together.” That actually sounds sane. Good for her! [MSNBC]
  • Apparently John Mayer hates Jennifer Aniston's dogs, Norman and Dolly, just like he hated ex-girlfriend Jessica Simpson's tiny lap puppy, Daisy. [Dlisted]
  • Aw, Girl Next Door Kendra Wilkinson won't show strangers her boobs anymore now that she's in luuurve. “She’s changed so much. She’s not even the same person. … She doesn’t flash anymore. She’s a lot more conservative. She’s so in love," says fellow Bunny Bridget. [NYDN]
  • Kirsten Dunst's stalker, Christopher Smith, has been "forbidden from owning (or possessing) a gun, and/or coming anywhere near Dunst, where she lives, her personal assistant or where she works." He showed up at Kiki's house over Thanksgiving and scared the crap out of her. Good thing she's getting the legal protection she needs. [ASL]
  • Pete Wentz: Ashlee's breast milk tastes "weird." Pete Wentz: please stop. [E! Online]