Have Mercy: Is There A Full House Spinoff In The Works?

For children of the 80's, the past few years have been a nostalgia overload of sorts. Now that our generation is staring to make decisions regarding television programming, movie scripts, and big-budget remakes, the heroes of our youth are making their way back into our lives, whether we like it or not. Of course, it doesn't hurt that our peers are now having children, and are looking to share a piece of their childhoods with their own kids: and the resurgence of Transformers, G.I. Joe, Willy Wonka, and Indiana Jones is making it easier than ever for said parents to do so. (Even though Indy 4 was rubbish.) So what better time, I ask you, then for the Full House crew, that bastion of predicability (much like the milkman, the paperboy, and evenin' tv) to return to our small screens. Think I'm joking? Guess again, Tanneritos!

Rumor has it that Uncle Jesse Cochran Katsopolis himself, John Stamos, is working on a "semi-remake" of the syrupy series that would center around D.J. and Stephanie Tanner, those two kids who shared the spotlight with the bazillionaire Olsen twins, back in their pre-verbal celebrity days. Candace Cameron Bure, who has recently returned to acting after some time off, and Jodie Sweetin, who has recently made headlines with her meth addiction, subsequent recovery, marriage, and subsequent divorce, have been in talks with Stamos to get the series off the ground. As for the plot? "We would revive our characters, but today as young women," Cameron Bure says.

Part of me really, really wants this show to happen, purely out of curiosity. Will D.J. Tanner go by Donna Jo? Does Stephanie still say, "How rude?" Are these two women a bit messed up from being raised by an obsessive-compulsive father, one uncle who constantly wore a talking woodchuck puppet on his hand and another who was 88% convinced that he was reincarnation of Elvis? And did Aunt Becky finally realize how insane it was that she agreed to raise her family in an attic? And, perhaps most importantly, what of Kimmy Gibler?!

But the more dominant feeling I had, upon reading this article, was this: with every reincarnation of a childhood favorite, there comes a sense of ickiness, a realization that you are no longer 9, and these characters are no longer interesting, or funny, or real. They are scenery from a trip you can't take again, weird ghosts from a you that no longer exists, and much like watching Indiana Jones chasing bloody aliens, you begin to view the stars of your childhood memories through a lens of "perhaps I should have just lived with the memories." Because honestly, when you see a child star of your youth all grown up, you have no choice but to recognize that you're grown up, too. Indiana Jones suddenly looks like your dad. Adult D.J. Tanner looks like a woman you work with. And Transformers, even with all their special effects, just look like robots in disguise courtesy of some really awesome technical tricks.

It's also a bit strange, I imagine, to be in Cameron Bure or Sweetin's shoes: our nostalgia, in a way, is also theirs, and who can blame them for wanting to go back to a period in their lives where they were beloved by audiences everywhere? At the same time, however: does anyone really want to see Jodie Sweetin dive back into the role that set her on that Child Star Downfall path? And if Candace Cameron and Jodie Sweetin have to return to the roles that made them famous in order for us to pay attention to them, or to care, what does that say about the options they have? Or the options that we, as viewers, are willing to give them? Is rejecting the idea of a Full House return a way of saying, "You were only worth watching as an adorable child star," or is it, in a form, a way of saying, "We grew up with you, but it's time for all of us to move on to new things."

Still: if they gave Kimmy Gibler her own talk show, I would totally watch it. You know she'd call someone a "double geekburger with cheese" and all hell would break loose. How rude!

A Full House Remake, Original Recipe? [NYPost] via [TV Tattle]