• ...Just like Lance Armstrong, Hitler, Arnold Schwarzenegger and the other dudes with a single testicle.
• But as far as we know, those dudes have bellybuttons, unlike Karolina Kurkova, the no-navel icon.
• She may have a navel, but Lori Drew has no soul.
• Michelle Obama has a soul and, according to an obsessed Salon scribe, a big butt.

• Do vampires like big butts? Maybe we'll find out as Twilight mania takes over the nation.
• Vampires seem rather chivalrous, unlike many modern men, so at least they'd let your big butt in the cab first.
• Speaking of nether regions, one time Carrie Fisher's mom got her a vibrator for Christmas.
• A wrap dress will cover up your business (usually), but is it ever flattering?
• Victoria's Secret fashion show: covering your business in maribou since 1977.
• You guys. Thank effing Gawd it's Friday! So eat, read celebrity gossip on the internet and nap the day away. You deserve it!

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