"Elle's Gift Guide," write those mischievous elves at the surprisingly robust women's magazine, "seeks to answer the age-old question: What do you get someone who has everything?" We sympathize; we really have everything this holiday season, what with the great economy and all. So if you'd like to thank your family or friends with a little something, how about a shoe made of solid chocolate ($62 plus the health care costs associated with a case of mouth fungus)? Or a $95 set of mustards? We'll use them to make delicious holiday sandwiches with the season's next big ingredient, root beer leaf, which Elle recommends we acquire by purchasing a $500 membership in something called Veggie U. More great ideas, after the jump.

Send an email to Anna North, the author of this post, at annanorth@jezebel.com.