It's hard to know where to start with this month's Cosmo . There's the first date tips that tell you to be yourself while "mirroring" the guy's moves. Or the "cougar skills to crib," which includes acting like you don't want a husband — an especially interesting suggestion when paired with Cosmo 's oven-roasted chicken recipe, guaranteed "to encourage a man to pop the question." [Wait, didn't 'Glamour' do this, like, years ago? -Ed. ] But our favorite November feature is probably the fall cocktail lineup, which appears to be disease-themed. Would you like a nice Pink Eye? How about an Agave Stinger? Or perhaps a Pear-Fection (more popular than its cranberry-based variant, the Urinary Tract In-Fection)? As a bonus, they are all the color of bodily fluids. More fun with Cosmo , after the jump.