It's hard to know where to start with this month's Cosmo. There's the first date tips that tell you to be yourself while "mirroring" the guy's moves. Or the "cougar skills to crib," which includes acting like you don't want a husband — an especially interesting suggestion when paired with Cosmo's oven-roasted chicken recipe, guaranteed "to encourage a man to pop the question." [Wait, didn't 'Glamour' do this, like, years ago? -Ed.] But our favorite November feature is probably the fall cocktail lineup, which appears to be disease-themed. Would you like a nice Pink Eye? How about an Agave Stinger? Or perhaps a Pear-Fection (more popular than its cranberry-based variant, the Urinary Tract In-Fection)? As a bonus, they are all the color of bodily fluids. More fun with Cosmo, after the jump.