Madonna Hints That Guy Is "Emotionally Retarded"S
  • Did Madonna get "bored" playing dress-up on the English countryside? Andrew Morton writes that when friends found out the formerly skanky downtown vegetarian was out shooting birds, they gave the relationship 5 years. He adds: "The one thing Madonna hates more than chaos in her life is failure." Ritchie's movies "opened to less than rapturous reviews," but Madonna's new movie received high praise. "She has proved that she can live with fake. But not with failure." [The Daily Beast]
  • Guy Ritchie spent the day his divorce was announced filming interior scenes for Sherlock Holmes. [People]
  • Oh, snap: Guy Ritchie reportedly wants "not one penny" of Madonna's estimated £300 million fortune. Plus, he hates Kabbalah. [The Sun]
  • Madonna hired divorce attorney Fiona Shackleton, who repped Prince Motherfucking Charles, as well as Sir Paul McCartney. And yeah, there's no pre-nup. [Perez Hilton]
  • Madonna in concert: "This song is for the emotionally retarded. Maybe you know some people who fall into that category. I know I do." [Mirror]
  • A source says Gwyneth Paltrow "begged" Madonna all summer "not to be an idiot" and let her marriage fall apart. Gwynnie wanted them to keep it together for the kids. [Digital Spy]
  • Guy Ritchie is moving out of the London house. Madonna might move to New York, though. Lourdes maybe wants to move to NYC to be near her bio-dad, Carlos Leon. What will happen to Rocco and David? What about the children? [Perez Hilton]
  • Madonna's been "closer" to Carlos Leon lately. [The Sun]
  • Guy Ritchie allegedly tells a friend: "I'm afraid the laughs in our life together were long gone. She's obsessed with her own public image, obsessed with being seen as some kind of global soothsayer. It's silly, she's a pop star. There was a time when she used to have a sense of humour about herself. In the last few years, she just got angry." [Mirror]
  • Guy calls the marriage a "three ring circus" that had to end. [Mirror]
  • Guess who is waiting in the wings, learning Kabbalah? Alex Rodriguez. [E!]
  • DJ AM made his first big public appearance at a benefit concert Tuesday night in Hollywood. The 5-hour show was a "Welcome Home" celebration and Mark Ronson, Mix Master Mike, Steve Aoki, and That 70s Show's Danny Masterson spun tunes on stage while AM watched and sang along. [People]
  • DJ AM says that after Travis Barker wrenched open the emergency exit after the plane crash, "I tried to cover my face as I jumped through a fireball. As soon as I hit the ground, I remembered, 'Stop, drop and roll.' So I started rolling." [ET]
  • Amy Winehouse "lost it" in a recording studio, blamed "Satan" for her drug problems and then smashed up a £3,000 guitar. [The Sun]
  • Amy will DJ tonight at London pub The Monarch! Maybe she'll spin the records backwards! [Mirror]
  • Quentin Tarantino has changed the name of his film Inglorious Bastards to InglOURious BastERds, which is much, much better. [Perez Hilton]
  • Aniston & Mayer: Late dinner at the Sunset Tower Hotel in L.A. [People]
  • Denis Leary is defending his statements about autism: He says critics obviously haven't read his book. "They missed the sections I thought made my feelings about autism very clear: that I not only support the current rational approaches to the diagnoses and treatment of real autism but have witnessed it firsthand while watching very dear old friends raise a functioning autistic child." [E!]
  • Stevie Wonder's house: Burned! In the L.A. wildfires! A source says: "Everything was destroyed - all of Stevie's memorabilia, photos, musical instruments, history, clothing, furniture, everything. It's all gone. It was his main residence and he is utterly devastated. Stevie's had to put his tour and appearances on hold while he deals with this." [Page Six]
  • A statement has been issued that reads: "In light of continuous speculation over the lives and marriage of Tea Leoni and David Duchovny, the couple has confirmed that they have in fact been separated for several months. the statement says. The couple had hoped to keep this separation private for the sake of their children." [People]
  • Reese Witherspoon gave Jake Gyllenhaal a "sexy lingerie show" while shopping in London. She beckoned him into the changing room and Jake watched as she "wiggled into various bra and panty sets, including an itsy-bitsy pair of purple panties and a matching push-up bra." [Star]
  • Lauren Conrad might go to colleges to talk to students about dating abuse and violence. She works with Mark Cosmetics' M-Powerment campaign for young women. [E!]
  • LC and Heidi reconciled!!! Lauren was at a restaurant celebrating her runway show at LA Fashion Week with family and friends. Spencer and Heidi were at the bar eating dinner. Heidi spotted LC and the two ended up hugging. [ONTD, Us]
  • Angelina Jolie found out that she was pregnant right before she started filming "harrowing" scenes set in a mental institution for Changeling. [NY Times]
  • When will Tina Fey be back on SNL? "I don't know," Fey says. [CNN]
  • The first day in Britney's driving without a license trial ended without a juror being seated. One man labeled the idea of a trial "ridiculous." [USA Today]
  • Britney didn't show up, btw. [LA Times]
  • Um, Lynne Spears is in talks to turn her book, Through The Storm, into a movie. What's that saying? Oh yes: *Headdesk*. [Perez Hilton]
  • Janet Jackson's mystery illness: migraine-associated vertigo. She's feeling better and has resumed touring. [USA Today]
  • Peter Cook/teenage assistant sex tape: It exists. [Page Six]
  • Christina Aguilera showed some kind of X-rated video clip during her This Day Africa Rising charity concert at London's Royal Albert Hall. Classy! [Mirror]
  • Last week the More magazine's Women In Hollywood luncheon had a "stellar panel," including: Cybill Shepherd (as moderator), S. Epatha Merkerson (Law & Order), Polly Draper (Thirtysomething and the creator of the Naked Brothers Band), Kate Mulgrew (Star Trek Voyager) and Talia Balsam (Mad Men). The ladies talked about how hard it is for women and minorities to find quality parts. Balsam said, "We live in a celebrity focused world and that is harder to fight than age. They want me in my 40s to play the part of the grandmother." There's more if you click. [Women & Hollywood]
  • Queen Latifah talks about beekeeping, The Secret Life Of Bees, confidence and Barack Obama: "I've been voting since I was 18 years old," she says: "I think it's such a powerful thing; I like it, it's fun to me, it's exciting, you feel like you're part of the process, and you feel like you have say-so." [Premiere]
  • Ryan O'Neal and son Redmond: Both charged with possession of methamphetamine, a felony. [AP]
  • Khloe Kardashian had to go to the morgue yesterday, as part of her DUI penance. [E!]
  • Jade Jagger was trying to build an eco-home in Cotswold Water Park, near Cirencester, Gloucestershire. But a rare orchid caused developers to move the location. [Telegraph]
  • Kelly Osbourne has started a "band" with two Radio 1 DJs. The "band" is called OMG. It's just a silly video. [Mirror]
  • Ringo Starr says his ban on fan mail was "in direct response to an inordinate amount of items which have recently appeared for sale on eBay" and that all the mail is "a waste of paper and we all should be mindful of our carbon footprint" and that fans can still email him. He also said, "Please read this in a mellow way. Peace and love." [Rolling Stone]
  • A new Muppet movie? For adults? The Happytime Murders would take place in a world where humans co-exist with puppets. [Perez Hilton]
  • Kevin Costner's wife is pregnant with her second child. [Star]
  • Brad Paisley and Kimberly Williams are expecting a second child. [People]
  • Lisa Bonet: Expecting her third child. Daddy is hot hottie Jason Momoa. [People]
  • Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes: Posthumous album. [Perez Hilton]
  • Molly Ringwald has come out… Against Proposition 8. Cute video! [E!]
  • Despite what you may have heard, Holly Madison is not looking for a new sugar daddy. "Where do these stories come from?" she asks. "I'm adjusting to the single life, and looking forward to the adventures ahead!" [ONTD]
  • ABBA's Bjorn found innocent in Swedish tax evasion case. Winner takes it all… [UPI]
  • Jay Leno: Being sued by the estate of a Macy's department store heir over a rare vintage car. [Reuters]
  • Headline of the day: "They said it wouldn't last. But months later, Ronnie Wood's still with his Russian floozy, downing two bottles of vodka a day . . . and heading for a £70m divorce" [Daily Mail]
  • OMG a remake of The Monkees. "Producers are already on the hunt for four hunky surfer dude types to play an updated version of the original boyband." I'm not your stepping stone! [The Sun]
  • "ID LOVE IF THE INDUSTRY COULD ONE DAY UNDERSTAND THAT THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN OBESITY AND FAT AND THICK AND THIN AND SICK. I AM A THICK GIRL, I HAVE NEVER BEEN OVER A SIZE 12, I CAN RUN, AND I TRY MY BEST TO EAT RIGHT ALL THE TIME. I AM NOT THE TEXT BOOK WEIGHT THAT THEY SAY I SHOULD BE, BUT EVERYDAY I HAVE MY OWN PERSONAL STRUGGLES, AND I THINK THAT PEOPLE NEED TO RESPECT THAT." — just a mere snippet of a long MySpace blog written by Raven Symone. [ONTD]
  • "I mean, I know we seem crazy, just bringing them in one after the other, but we do plan. We make sure one is absorbed completely into the family before we add another. There are moments when we look at everyone around the dinner table, and it’s just crazy, but our family is the greatest thing we’ve done in our lives." — Angelina Jolie, on having more kids. [NY Times]
  • "I blocked out second grade completely. I have no recollection of it. I always talk to my mom and my grandma about it. It was because I cried every day. I didn't understand the culture. I didn't understand the people. I didn't understand the language. My first sentence of my essay to get into college was like, 'Imagine being blind and deaf at age seven.' And that's kind of what it felt like moving to the States. But I got over it pretty fast." — Mila Kunis, who arrived in L.A. from the Ukraine at age 7. [LA Times]
  • "I did hear there was a rumour going around and my agent actually got a couple of calls about it so he checked it out. Apparently I’m on a list but I’m not sure what list exactly! I hope it’s not a sex offenders register!" — Ricky Gervais, on whether he'll host The Oscars. [Daily Express]
  • "I don't believe you have to be monogamous, but you have to be respectful. Don't come home and say: 'Oh, I've just had sex with someone else.'" — Boy George, to the Times of London. [Page Six]
  • "Right now, we’re not cool Mom and Dad. Even video games, you know, it’s: 'Mom, you can’t play this. You won’t know how.' Oh, they all think I can’t do anything, that I’m just there to snuggle with. But the other day Madd said, 'Can you do a cartwheel?' And I said, 'Yeah, I can.' And he was like, 'Wow, Mom.' And I thought: 'Oh, yeah. I can do some things. You wait. You’ll find out. I’m capable.'" — Angelina Jolie. [NY Times]