• Only eight more weeks, people! At least we have hilarious helpers like Sarah Haskins and Samantha Bee to shepherd us through these difficult times.
• I don't know if you'd heard, it's kind of under the radar, but Bristol Palin is pregnant. Some of us think it is a non-issue.
• Others of us want to use it to question Palin's policy on education, abortion, and health care.
• But you know, asking Palin questions about these things is just SEXIST, you pinko media elites!

• Our very own media elite, Megan, braved the RNC so we didn't have to.

• Instead, we sat at home with our righteous, indignant, borderline insane rage.
• Ok. Deep breaths people. You know what? It's Friday. Find your own personal Levi The Defiler and bang the crap out of that gum-chewing troglodyte! It'll get your mind off things. Just remember use a rubber.

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