Liveblogging Bill Clinton's Convention SpeechOh, damn, I barely got to my seat in time but I am here! They closed the hall again, like that's any big deal because every speech they close the hall (except in Boston, where I swear they bribed the fire marshalls). But this is Bill Clinton, bitches!9:25 ET: Um, shortest speech by Bill Clinton ever? Yes, we can. 9:24 ET: Malia and Sasha are pretty fucking cute. But Bill Clinton maaaaaaybe ought not to talk about other men's hot wives. Just sayin' 9:23 ET: Bill Clinton was on the right side of history in 1992 he says. 9:21 ET: Fuck four more years. Let's not be polite. 9:19 ET: Extremist philosophy of the Republicans? Oh, wait, it's economic and not "Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb Iran"? 9:17 ET: Autistic kids, and their parents having to get divorced to afford health care? Fuck yeah, that's the family values the Republicans want. Anyone remember John McCain's first wife? Yeah, he doesn't really either. 9:16 ET: First boo of the night for what the Republican party's initiatives. Ooh, Bill, talk to me about income inequality some more. I love alliteration. 9:15 ET: Man, I know this is Nat Sec night, but, seriously? Let's talk about health (care), baby, let's talk about you and me... 9:13 ET: Clinton Global Initiative anyone? Also, a renewal of a commitment to fighting AIDS at home? Yay. Use condoms. 9:12 ET: Yay for the Constitution? Hooray! Let's not talk about FISA. Yeah, I'm still going there. 9:11 ET: "The long... hard... primary." Snort. 9:10 ET: Foreign policy FTW. Except, you know, it's not 2004. Also, when did Bill Clinton start bringing the crowd down. 9:09 ET: "Rebuilding the American dream." That's a drinking line if I ever heard it 10 times. 9:07 ET: "Hillary did say last night that she was going to do everything she could to elect Barack Obama Obama. Actuall that makes two of say." [standing ovation] "Actually, that makes 18 million of us." Minus, you know, at least 3 P.U.M.A.s. 9:06 ET: Hillary's speech did kick ass last night. 9:05 ET: Second joke of the night. Also, his candidate didn't win but he's proud of here. 9:05 ET: Applause stops. "I am here, first, to support Barack Obama." Never mind, it started again. 9:04 ET: "Sit down!" 9:01 ET: Applause starts. They ain't shutting up for a while.