Holy Fuck

Well, we know where the law stands on giving a BJ in Idaho, but the Middle Ages were so much worse. Sometime around 1245, St. Albert The Great helped pen a handbook for sexual penances. The length of the punishment — bread, water, and abstinence — for "exotic congress" varied, depending on the sexual position.Punishments were as follows: Sex with the woman on top = three years; lateral, seated or standing sex= 40 days; coitus retro (rear entry)=40 days; mutual masturbation=30 days; inter-femural sex, aka ejaculation between the legs=40 days; coitus in terga, aka anal sex=three years (with an adult); two years (with a boy); seven years (habitual); 10 years (with a cleric). Oh, yeah, some things never change. [The Smart Set]