With a bunch of states finally getting around to banning text messaging while driving, I began to wonder what other bad-idea auto activities are illegal. Actually, the only one I really care about — or engage in — is "road head" (when the driver of a car receives oral sex, for those prudes/pedestrians out there). It's kinda mainstream, since it's been featured in movies like Crash and friggin' Parenthood, but I was thinking that since it is kinda dangerous, and potentially deadly, it must be moving violation. Right?

I couldn't find any specific written laws (by state, that is) that says that road head is a no-no. But that's actually because in so many states, regular, plain ol' BJs are totally illegal, no matter where you're giving or receiving them. Many states have ye olde tyme-y anti-gay rules that outlaw any sex that isn't penis/vagina. Here are a list that I was able to put together.

Alabama (not surprising, given their laws on sex toys) Penalty = 1 year/$2,000
Florida Penalty = 60 days/$500
Idaho Penalty = 5 years to life…life!
Kansas Penalty = 6 months/$1,000, (only applies to same-sex acts)
Louisiana Penalty = 5 years/$2,000
Michigan Penalty = up to 15 years imprisonment, repeat offenders get life
Mississippi Penalty = 10 years
North Carolina Penalty = 10 years/discretionary fine
Oklahoma Penalty = 10 years (only applies to same-sex acts)
South Carolina Penalty = 5 years/$500
Texas Penalty = $500 (only applies to same-sex acts)
Utah Penalty = 6 months/$1,000
Virginia Penalty = 1-5 years

It's good to know that of the three states (that I can remember, at least) I've given and received road head — Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and New York — I wasn't technically breaking the law. But it is kinda dangerous to do. I haven't done it in about a year or two, but that's just because I don't have a car and I haven't dated anyone with one since then.