Baffled Scientists Discover That People Get Drunk To Get Laid

In a new study that has left researchers puzzled and concerned, it turns out that 33% of men and 23% of women in Europe drink to increase their chances of getting laid. The problem, you see, is that most people used to think that getting the people they wanted to have sex with drunk increased their chances of getting some (see: Janka, Paul). The study also finds that "Drunkenness and drug use were found to be strongly associated with an increase in risk taking behaviour and feeling regretful about having sex," which would lead one to believe that the women didn't want to have sex in the first place, only the article says "this study showed many young people were "strategically' binge drinking or abusing drugs to improve their sex lives." Dichotomy anyone? Let's explore.


Can you go out to get drunk for the purpose of getting laid and then regret it? Sure. Maybe you end up sexually assaulted (a consequence not addressed by the study). Maybe the guy sucks in bed and you regret leaving the other guy behind at the bar. Maybe you're drunk enough you forgo the use of birth control (a risk cited by the study) and end up with an STI or pregnant. Maybe you drink to repress the acknowledgment of your own ethics about having drunken one-night stands, in which case you should probably stop drinking and having one-night stands and get thee to a good therapist. Regret comes in a myriad of forms, but the report on this study makes it sound as though most people (or, the implication is, most women) regret having a drunken one-night stand despite the actual results of the study:

Yet despite the negative consequences, we found many are deliberately taking these substances to achieve quite specific sexual effects.
Have I had drunken, emotionally meaningless sex? Sure. Did I regret it? I regretted it exactly one time for a very specific reason related to a specific crap guy. So, if I answered the questions in the survey honestly, I would be an example of a correlation betwen drinking and regretted sexing, even though the regret came from the kind of headcase he turned out to be and not from actually having had sex with him. On the other hand, I don't set out to get drunk in order to have sex. I get drunk in order to, you know, get drunk. If I get laid, well, happy times!

Europeans Get Drunk 'To Have Sex' [BBC]