Jezebel
- Mischa Barton claims she is a PhotoShop Of Horrors victim: A new batch of paparazzi beach shots showed her legs riddled with cellulite. "Those photos are doctored," Barton's rep, Lisa Perkins, says. "I'm not saying she's perfect, nobody is. But they've given a 22-year-old woman the legs and bottom of an 80-year-old." The pix were taken by the dude she's pissed at for snapping topless shots; the same one who ran Nicole Kidman off of the road. [Rush & Molloy]
- You can see the pictures here, with a regular paparazzi shot as well. Photoshop? [Daily Mail]
- Apparently Mariah Carey wanted a $3 million wedding with doves and orchids and Nick Cannon wanted to get married ASAP with no fuss. Mariah agreed because, as she has said, "We really do feel we are soulmates. I never felt a love like this was in the cards for me." Aww, that should be sweet but somehow it's fucking annoying. [Mirror]
- Lindsay Lohan: Seen doing shots of tequila with Lauren Conrad! LL turned her back so no one would see; unfortunately she was facing a window and the whole bar could see her reflection. Whoops! [Rush & Molloy]
- Meanwhile: You know how Lindsay had finally gotten a movie role? In that Manson Girls flick? Well she's been kicked off of the project. Producers "discovered that they couldn't find any name actresses who wanted to co-star with her," says Nikki Finke. [Deadline Hollywood via ONTD]
- It looks like officials in Malawi are all set to grant full adoption rights to Madonna. A document says: "Mr and Mrs Ritchie have shown a strong commitment in providing the infant with all essential needs like love, safe home environment, care, protection, material as well as emotional support." [Yahoo News]
- Jessica Simpson will be little sister Ashlee's maid of honor. At Ashlee's yet-to-be-scheduled wedding. [People]
- Jeremy Piven and Pink: Seen "all over each other" and "dancing really close." [Page Six]
- Alec Baldwin may want to switch careers. "In a matter of weeks, I'm going to be 50," he says. As long as he doesn't leave 30 Rock! [Page Six]
- Even though Tom Cruise told Oprah that he regrets his infamous argument on the Today show, Matt Lauer, Lauer says, "I don't think he needs to apologize. I don't feel there are any hard feelings. It was an interview. It was a good moment on television." Oh Matt. You're glib, Matt. Glib. [People]
- Jessica Alba challenges you to a staring contest. [People]
- Katie Holmes "has got the itch" to have another baby. Praise Xenu! [E!]
- Poor Uma Thurman may be in court again! Lancôme is suing Uma as a preemptive strike: Her contract as the face of the cosmetics company expired in 2005; yet her picture was seen in ads on Asian websites and on a Canadian billboard recently. [E!]
- Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt get their locks lightened by the same colorist. News you can use. [E!]
- Josh Brolin as George W. Bush. [E!]
- Daisy Lowe, 19, is loving hanging out with new boyfriend Mark Ronson, 32. Sigh. [Daily Mail via ONTD]
- Um, Chloe Lattanzi, daughter of Olivia Newton-John and contestant on Rock The Cradle, seems to have had quite a bit of collagen injected into her lips. And maybe a nose job. [ONTD]
- When Simon Cowell was a teenager, he hated school so much he was practically suicidal. He says, "I was so bored. I didn't like rules or discipline. So when someone said, 'These are the best days of your life' I actually thought about jumping off a bridge." [Mirror]
- Foxy Brown pleaded guilty to "menacing" a woman with her BlackBerry in 2007 and thereby avoided going on trial for assault. Time for a kinder, gentler Foxy! [Reuters]
- There is audio of the domestic violence 911 call involving Vanilla Ice, if you care to hear it. [The Superficial]
- Madonna is endorsing secondary ticket sales for her upcoming tour, which means if at first it seems like it's sold out, it might not be — if you have the cash. [Financial Times]
- Ashton Kutcher slept around before he met Demi Moore, surprise, surprise. [The Sun]
- Daniel Depp got his debut novel published, maybe because he is Johnny Depp's (half) brother? [Independent]
- Hot hottie Gary Dourdan of CSI has been charged with felony drug possession. Maybe I'm old but I remember him best as the gorgeous man in the Janet Jackson video. [Yahoo News]
- Rihanna kissing Chris Brown at KFC! LOL! [Concrete Loop]
Comments
JOHNNY DEPP HAS A BROTHER? Can he do a passable Jack Sparrow imitation?? I am googling immediately. This is excellent news to start a day after 4 hours of sleep.
But what about the Unicorns Mariah?
Jeremy Piven and Pink?In what alternate reality does that happen?
Can I switch careers with you Alec? I'll be 30 in a matter of weeks!
How does Mark Ronson escape the "perv" title again for dating a teenager while in his 30's?
I have nothing but pity for Chloe Lattanzi. Aside from bulimia, She had two good-looking parents and got nothing from it. Even Jamie Lee Curtis got her mom's rack and some decent bone structure.
Is Lohan still trying to pretend she's sober? I thought the cat was outta the bag by now...
And dudes - I saw those Misha Barton cellulite pics, and I must say they seemed pretty extreme considering the way she looks most of the time. I believe her.
New career for Alec Baldwin: rock star! I can see it now -- The Baldwin Brothers!
I menace with my blackberry by sending emails that require some work to resolve. How does Foxy do it?
GOOGLE IMAGE HAS FAILED. Alas. Homewrecking plans are back on.
Hmmm...just when Katie gets a role on Broadway, Tom is going to move across country so he can take care of Suri. Then Tom goes on Oprah to declare how great their marriage is. Now, Katie has the "itch" to have another baby. Are the marionette strings showing a bit?
I've got the itch to pay my cell phone bill. You know, because I signed a contract.
@zivah: Lindsay Lohan has a drinking problem? Who knew?
Chloe Lattanzi has had a bit of work done on her face and I think she's only 22, which is way too young to do a complete overhaul on your head.
Apparently, Foxy had sharpened one edge of her Blackberry and was using it as a shiv.
I hear that Scientology can clear Katie Holmes of "itch"iness, redness, and remove corns and calluses. Wait, that's Gold Bond Medicated.
@NefariousNewt: eh, before BangieB gets here, and also because I know someone who went through a similar situation: Sometimes, you can be addicted to certain drugs, and not alcohol. Of course, she probably shouldn't be drinking again yet so soon after rehab, but I honestly believe her issues lie with other things beyond alcohol. Just my 2 cents.
@brendastarlet: she turned down the role on broadway because of tom.
so, yes, to the strings thing!
News you can use
I´m really trying hard to think of a situation when my insightful knowledge of heidi and spencer could be ... helpful.
I mean, it´s not like I´ve ever seen an episode of the hills. I might have to look up if it runs here in europe.
Maybe we should hook Lindsay up with Britney's dad. He gives off kind of a douche-y vibe, but I haven't seen Britney naked, barefoot, or pregnant in quite some time.
@Macloserboy: I think Chloe has Body Dysmorphic Disorder as well. Sad.
So, since Mariah and Nick didn't blow all that money on a wedding, what are they going to do with it? I have several sure-fire investment opportunities I'd like to tell them about...
I feel the same way about the back of my thighs when standing in a Nordstrom dressing room, Mischa. Wait! Unless, the Nordstrom mirrors are photshopping my reflection? Bad lighting is a bitch. Get over yourself.
Me: Alec Baldwin, don't switch careers! That's a terrible idea!
AB: No it isn't. We've looked into it, and it isn't. I can show you the report.
@Meg: It couldn't hurt at this point -- it's not like her parents are actually trying to help her.
The couple that dyes together, lies together.
Awww, Linds. I would do tequila with you and I'd totally co-star with you. Except you've had substance abuse issues, and one margarita puts me the fuck to sleep, and I'm not a name-brand actress. But y'know. The thought counts, right?
@daftpunkisplayingatMYhouse: 4 hours of sleep here too!
Doesn't Lindsay realized she should get her act together?? People are not taking roles in movies BECAUSE of her! She really needs to just get away from Hollywood.
Ashton, you randy monkey!
Hey Alec, do you know what sucks about being a Baldwin?
No, what?
NOTHING!!
@daftpunkisplayingatMYhouse: I'm not going to argue that cases like that exist, but considering the fact that she can't seem to go out without trying to steal a sip of alcohol -- when she knows the world is waiting and watching -- I'm going to have to disagree with that assessment. If she didn't have a problem with alcohol (and the rumors are true, which they may not be), she would have an occasional drink in the privacy of her own home.
Do Heidi and Spencer go to the same place to get their bikini waxes, too?
Mischa Barton: seriously, you care about this? Seriously? Take some words from my Poppy-- "Those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." ... My Poppy would often say this to me shortly before or after criticizing my tattoos or food choices. I don't think he ever quite got the irony.
@Macloserboy: I don't think he's escaping it entirely. Also, she's 19 - so yes, technically a teenager, but legally an adult. And he looks a bit younger than 32 to me, while she looks a bit more than 19. So it's not too visually jarring.
@abbycadabby: photoshopping. but photshopping could be the culprit too.
Yeah, I'm still not buying that Mariah and Nick Cannon are married. Hold on... googling Pop Fiction...
@pinkyBella: Seriously. I loved Mean Girls, like everyone did, and her SNL appearance was hilarious. I even liked some of her damn music. I would truly more likely enjoy Linds doing something well, instead of reveling in Linds fucking up, which is what it seems like most of America enjoys. Sigh. Poor girl.
@BlondeGrlz: Matthew Broderick was brilliant last night!
@KathrynwithaY loves Joan Collins: Did you see her on Rock The Cradle? Olivia starts crying when they discuss her bulimia and it's suggested that her mom never being around may have had something to do with it. Of course, this is when Olivia has to leave for Japan. The girl needs a constant stream of hugs. And to get into theater where her voice would have a place.
1) Those Mischa Barton pictures are not flattering.
2) Why did Chloe L. butcher herself. She was pretty. Now she just looks weird. She's prematurely aged herself. Why Chloe Why?!?!?!
3) Baldwin kills on 30 Rock.
@KathrynwithaY loves Joan Collins: ABSOLUTELY.
I read a People magazine interview with her where she declared herself "fully recovered" an ED in one sentence and then said "I can't eat with other people watching me" in the next.
@robot ninja spy: Yeah, if they're still "married" after the season finale, maybe, MAYBE I'll believe it.
@cate3710: Yeah, but it speaks volumes to his personality. He doesn't even have a mid-life crisis excuse to fall back on.
@Macloserboy: True enough.
@meaghan2k: One of the finest cartoon Baldwin representations. Another would be Homer's job as Alec's assistant, wherein he calls Kim Basinger "Kim Bass-in-Gur."
Tremendous.
@daftpunkisplayingatMYhouse: I'm the same way, I would rather see someone suceed than fail. It's the same with Amy Winehouse. I want that poor girl to get help so bad.
After seeing Robert Downey in Iron Man, I know it's possible. Lindsay and Amy should have a meeting with him.
@Meg: Honestly, I do think the girl has not finished working on her substance issues. For all we know, she is substituting alc for whatever it was that she was doing before. I was just throwing it out there, because sometimes ppl need to work on the more serious things first, and baby step to other things.
I wish my thighs looked as good as Mischa Barton's.
Spencer & Heidi are vapid media whores. When will they just go away?
I could give a rat's ass about Mischa's cellulite.
Now, onto more important things...
How come I have never heard about Johnny Depp's brother before?? Is he single?? Inquiring minds want to know.
uh, Johnny Depp has a brother?
That cellulite has to be real folks. There leaves very little Photoshop room with a wire fence in the way and the cellulite being that, uh, real.
I've seen 22 year olds with some nasty baggage so I don't by her publicist's ignorant comment.
Sorry you afforded Lipo and not the skin resculpting, Mischa.
@Macloserboy: Yes! Poor girl is always on the verge of tears and I think sticking her in front of a camera is the last place she should be right now. And how f'ed up is the suggestion of never getting enough attention by the mother who jets off to Japan in the middle of the daughter's show. Hello, big red flag!
@Macloserboy: Yikes, dude. That's a bit harsh on the ladies, don't you think? Try to remember to play nice re: physical fea