Jezebel

Catherina Zeta Bologna Jones had a mani/pedi hours before her schedule C-section in her Cedars-Senai suite.

I'd consider myself prepared if I remembered to bring my toothbrush.

My stepmom always went into this obsessive frenzy as she approached her due date. She just HAD to shave her legs and pits every night for fear of being seen to have body hair while in the hospital after giving birth (this was in the late 80s, so people had not yet gotten obsessed about pubic hair). Not an easy thing to do when you're 39 weeks pregnant, btw.

I always thought it was ridiculous and tried to reassure her that absolutely no one would give a damn about the state of her armpit/leg hair while she was in labor. I hope I'm not worried about that when I have kids.

when i was pregnant, i couldnt see to shave and waxing would hurt WAY too difficult to get in all those positions. who cares, its not like obgyns aren't looking at assorted cooches all day; hairy and hairless.

And if the baby's already crowning, you can get the slippery little bundle of joy her first highlights and/or weave!

These are the kind of women who have a professional photographer running around the delivery room and someone fixing their make-up between pushes.

@Miss Smith Drank Your Vodka: Ooops, I forgot the gagging sound.
bleeeechchchchchhchh

I wouldn't want my child to get a bad first impression.

...

In all actuality, I really don't think I'd care. The beautiful new born will be what's on everyone else's mind.

@BeckySharper: The only reason I'd want to shave is because I begin to get uncomfortable when I haven't for some time.

I get annoyed at girls who wear anything other than sweatpants or actually do their hair or makeup for an exam, so I'm not sure I could handle a woman who worries about a pedicure before giving birth.

Isn't this just a small class of women who would do this?

I know someone who put makeup on her newborn daughter before people took pictures of them. I shit you not. Lip gloss and blush. They both looked ridiculous. Of course, I looked like death warmed over in that picture, but please.

Sure why not!
When you are in nesting mode you NEED to get everything in order. I went for a pedicure, much appreciated with the swollen feet. Why not have a pedicure while you're starting the contractions, better than waiting in the hospital! The manicure should consist of cutting nails short and clean.
I think I did a little trim down there too..

@beatrice3000: the aggressively vain.

with 10 weeks to go in this pregnancy, i can tell you the last thing on my mind right now is waxing. Jesus.

Waxing is a priority before childbirth? Where are these ladies delivering, Hugh Hefner Presbyterian? "OMG, Nurse Becky, look at her! Body hair is so demode!"

Eh. I had a mani/pedi a couple of days before I had my (first so far) baby.

@SkipToMyLou: I certainly wasn't going to have time to do it afterwards. I can imagine if you have another at home it might be tough to prioritize that, however. And here's the kicker- the nurses at the hospital wiped the polish off a couple of fingers on each hand to attach heart rate monitors. So in my hospital pics I have a very uneven, bright red mani.

@TheFormerJuneBronson: I love the photo of my mom with newborn me -- she looks exhausted and messy but so damn happy!

Now that I think about it, girlfriend coulda used some blush though.

I would figure that would at least be the one time in my life it would be deemed acceptable by others to NOT have a perfect mani/pedi, hairdo, and shave. Believe me, I would take full advantage of that free pass.

Eh, if it helps relieve the stress of impending mothergood, why not?

I'm more concerned about women scheduling their c-sections for convenience than getting a pedi.

Oh, and if you have to have an emergency c-section/surgery, won't they take off ALL the polish and give you a free shave anyway? ;)

Having a hairless pubic region makes it much easier to do an episiotomy and close it up afterwards. Back when I was conducting deliveries, I would actually shave the area in advance or put in an order for a nurse to do it, just in case, along with the usual enema. We had a beautician available in our ward for manis/pedis, though her main job was with the cancer patients. Many expectant mothers took advantage of her services! I would add a caveat... keep in mind that in a hospital, especially in a teaching hospital, your vag-area is subject to scrutiny by any number of students, nurses, interns, residents, and attending physicians -- not to mention your husband, if he chooses to participate in the process. I don't pregnant mothers for wanting to look their best.

Unless my monchichi has magical baby-pooping powers I'll be too busy howling in pain to give a fuck.

@BadenBaden: Y'know not that many women have scheduled c-sections for their own convenience. They are oft talked into it for their doctor's convenience however. Convenience meaning everything from avoiding a long labour they have to attend to predictable office hours to opening up beds nice and quick to avoiding *any hint* no matter how unlikely of a lawsuit.

I am very low maintenance but before both my deliveries I got waxed and my toes done - so glad I did. During my recovery it was nice to have pretty feet and a clean bikini line since the rest of me felt and looked like hell.

@DoctorJezebel: If I am pushing a 5 to 10 pound little person out of my vag, and any one of the listed people has the nerve to think about whether my vag is pretty enough, fuck them. Fuck them SO HARD.

@ElleL: I know it was a typo, but I like how you said, "mothergood." Hear, hear to Mothergood!

@AFever: It's so not what those people think (I frankly don't care -- I've seen it all), but more about self-conscious mothers. One mom told me that she felt completely powerless in the hospital- in pain, and at the mercy of so many other people- and one of the only things she had control over was her appearance, i.e. whether her eyebrows were done, nails painted, etc. It was more of a self-esteem boost for her than something to appease hospital staff.

Eh, pretty soon Cornell, CHONY, and Mt. Sinai will find a way to market this and offer it in-suite.

@DoctorJezebel: You have got to be kidding because you are cracking my ass up!
Fuck you and anyone else who thinks they have a right to say how I and my husband prefer my appearance to look.

@DoctorJezebel: Your last sentence makes me sad, and angry. I tried to shave my vadge, but seeing as I couldn't see, it probably looked like I had vaginal alopecia. Honestly, If a woman wants to get a mani/pedi, put on some gloss, or shave their vadge, I don't really care. But to suggest a woman do so, or consider doing so, because the hospital staff may not find her grooming habits pleasing is ridiculous.

@DoctorJezebel: Um, the interns, students, residents, etc. can deal with it natural, thank you very much, and for you to suggest that we should give a damn is pretty offensive. Also, you stay the F away from me with your episiotomy. Actually, where do you work? I don't want to give birth there.

@DoctorJezebel: If you're saying that women should do what makes them feel comfortable, great. But it doesn't seem helpful to me, to tell someone who may be self-conscious to "keep in mind" the various people who will be judging. Various medical professionals, who frankly, should not forget the "professional" part.

@exelizabeth: Episiotomies are evil.

@DoctorJezebel: I'm sorry, but I find it odd to say that a woman about to give birth should be considering that her "vag-area is subject to scrutiny by any number of students, nurses, interns, residents, and attending physicians." If the woman would feel more comfortable with her nails done, so be it, but implying that her vagina is being judged by those employed to deliver a child is kind of demoralizing.

OMG my mother is one of these women! She wouldn't allow any newborn photos until she had her hair coifed and her makeup applied. She literally gave birth, groomed, put on the trendy lounge wear she brought with her and THEN allowed photos. She looks stunning and it speaks volumes about her and her parenting. None of it good. That being said I am kinda jealous 'cause I know I will be BUSTED but glowly in my post-push photo shoot.

My cousin got fresh tips put on right before she was due, and had perfect hair and makeup for all the pictures. She also got a massive piece of "push jewelry" for each of her three kids.

Yes, we are from Jersey.

And yes, there is a vowel at the end of our name.

@DoctorJezebel: God, I really don't want you assisting when I give birth. If I need to poop, you docs are just going to have to suffer. A woman about to give birth does NOT need something shoved up her ass to add to her discomfort. Ditto on shaving the crotch and adding major discomfort when the hair grows back spiky three days later. If you can't put sutures into a crotch that's not shaved, ur doin it wrong.

@SarahHeartburn: Just the word makes me shudder.

I can't see what the problem is with getting a mani/pedi before labor. You're just preparing for a big, messy event, and wanting to feel spruced up--for yourself, not the nurses, as some people seem to believe--is so not a big deal.

I cannot believe you guys are harshing on Doc Jezebel like this! All she said is if it makes the mother more comfortable, who cares? NO ONE IS TELLING MOTHERS THEY SHOULD GET WAXED. Ease the fuck up people!

One of my girlfriends had a pedicure and foot/leg massage the day before her baby was due. Her feet and ankles were swollen all the time by that point, and she just wanted an excuse to put her feet up and let someone else do something nice for her.

In the post-push pictures, she has a messy ponytail, and sweaty bangs plastered to her forehead, but she's holding her new baby, and looks incredibly happy....which she was. She didn't get a pedi to look pretty, she got it to have a chance to, really, have to sit still, take a break from nesting, and let someone rub her feet and legs.

Me? I didn't get a pedi. I got a hair cut just before I was due, really, the day the baby was due, and I was in early labor, I got a hair cut. Why? It was a little bit of pampering to have someone else wash my hair, and my stylist always did a wonderful scalp massage when she did that (God, I miss her, I live too far away to have her do my hair regularly, 3000 miles is a long ass commute), and to make my hair look pretty and shiny. Even if it was just for a few hours, it was nice to have freshly cut hair. Not because I wanted to "look pretty" in the post-push pictures, but because I wanted a little bit of pampering before I had to be changing Pampers constantly.

I looked made-up and fabulous in the pix taken right after I had my first and second kids. For me, it was indeed more of an identity issue. With the first baby especially, I was terrified that I would never be "me" again, and putting on a little makeup to look like myself made me feel better. No word yet on whether my adorable-and-adored kids think that makes me a shitty mother.

@ecs: The part I take issue with is her saying that she does enemas and crotch shaving as a standard part of preparing women for labor. This has a lot more to do with the comfort of the doctor than the comfort of the woman. That's what people are reacting to--not the free beauty treatments.

Honestly...I went into surprise (early) labor before I took a shower one night and my biggest regret about it all is how nasty I felt laying in a hospital bed with dirty ass hair. In all our "first" pictures I have my hair slicked back and look horrendous.

These women aren't trying to impress anyone, just feel better at a physically miserable time.

@DoctorJezebel: Oh, no no, I get that. If its about having control and making yourself comfortable, than I'm all for whatever someone needs to do that. But I just find it disheartening that a woman about to give birth would worry about whether people, including her husband for fuck's sake, thought her vag looked ok.
I think its that your last line makes it sound like the fact that people will be examining your vag is something that people criticizing these mothers are forgetting...but we're not forgetting, we just think its ridiculous to worry about.

@ecs: Frankly, I'm not going to "ease the fuck up" about how *I* want to give birth, because I do not trust doctors to act in my best interest. And maybe that's harsh, but I've heard too many stories about women in labor who just were not listened to, so you've got to look out for yourself. Dr.Jezebel's attitude just reeked of the attitude that I fear most from OB/GYNs. The way she phrased her first comment was not, "This is what might make women comfortable," it was, "You should keep in mind lots of people will be looking." Badly phrased? Maybe. But I want way more sensitivity from my OB/GYN. I hope she considers that as she works with her patients. Because if I were her patient and her attitude were like it came across in that first comment when I met her, I would find another doctor. *That's* about my comfort.

I just had a baby two and a half weeks ago, before then I hadn't seen the ole beav in several months. During my birth and hospital stay, I didn't give a shit about what I looked like or what anybody thought about the wildebeast my bush was.

@ecs: I don't agree that I was "harshing" on anyone. Nor do I think it's wrong for women to do whatever makes them feel better. I challenged something I didn't agree with, in a calm and respectful manner. And I'm quite at ease, but thanks for the suggestion.

Oy Vey. This reminds me of when I saw pictures of that woman from The King of Queens holding her new child in the hospital with full hair and makeup done. Granted, she was in a magazine and all, but could she have waited to sell her baby out for money until after she was out of the hospital? The birth of a child is beautiful. No one expects you to look like you do on your TELEVISION SHOW after you just spent (insert hours) pushing out a babe.

@exelizabeth: WELL SAID!!

@SkipToMyLou: and yes, I am well aware of why there exists a large increase in c-sections, but there is a growing number of women opting for it for their convenience as well, as evidenced by a recent Time magazine article. Also, I work with doctors and we have discussed this.

My main concern was the pooping issue. My OB/GYN giggled at me when I asked if I needed an enema...He was like..."OK, that's going to be any better? If you poop, you poop,now let's get this little one out of you!"

I love this man!

Ha, when I started labor with #1, I sat and finished writing my shower thanks yous and pre-wrote the birth announcements. With #2 I insisted we finish cleaning the house--vacuuming, putting away toys and laundry, general tidying.
Yes, I did have a mani because I wanted my hands to look pretty. But I had my priorities right!

I can see myself dusting on some powder after giving birth so the light isn't bouncing off of my face and making me look as drenched in sweat as I imagine I would be. In terms of the mani/pedis, I don't know. If it makes you feel good, do it. And for most of the women who feel it ohmygod absolutely necessary, these are probably the same women who are doing it EVERY sing week anyway, and so yeah, they were keeping up with their "maintenance" until the very end.

As DoctorJezebel said, I think this has to do with your own comfort. If you are the kind of woman who usually does these things and then feels totally powerless while in the hospital and is going to worry also about looking a mess, then by all means do them. If you are going to be the person giving birth who is super worried about having a full bush, whatever, wax it so you can think about the baby you are pushing into the world. If you are not, then don't wax, who cares.

@LaFemme: And I would take an enema. I know it's natural, but the idea of shitting myself as I deliver my child does gross me out.

this is stupid. they give you a free shave with childbirth at the hospital.

@LaFemme: But isn't having an enema grosser? Eek. I've never had an enema, but I have shat myself (hey, we've all had a debilitating flu/food poisoning before) and it just requires some baby wipes or TP or something, not liquid up the bum! To each their own though.

Never though I would say "to each their own" regarding the choice of shitting one's self or enemas, lol.

@Sheer Debauchery: You're right - you get shaven. They were laughing at me there because I was on the table, shaking really hard from fever, and I was like, "Don't go to short, it'll itch too much when it grows in." Hey, practicalities.

And I was posting on Jezebel the entire week leading up to the birth, even when I was having false labor pains, because what the hell else are you going to do? It's not like you feel like moving around (well, I didn't, anyway.)

@battleaxonista: Every time you call it your monchichi it cracks my shit up!

Having been through this twice, I have to say whatever makes you comfortable is what you should do. I have never seen a picture of a brand new Mom who isn't beautiful.

That said, I did the waxing thing, because it's what I always do, and I couldn't see my bikini line, so was paranoid about that. I tried doing the wear-a-little-make-up to look good the first time around. It doesn't look quite as good smeared all over the place. I actually washed off my mascara before labor, because I didn't want to look like Alice Cooper the first time my daughter saw me.

@DoctorJezebel: Oh good Lord, thanks for reminding me of the 7 med-students that came in to witness the birth of my son, unannounced..I saw them writing in their notebooks, could it have been about my pubic hair?? ;-)

@DoctorJezebel: I'd like to add what other people are saying by remarking: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY? Sorry for the yelling, but really now, does any woman who has gained between 25-35 pounds (more, if you're me) who is tired, sick of lumbering around, sick of avoiding tons of fun stuff, need additional reason to be worried?

You have pissed me off.

@AFever: I imagine the enema as being done as soon as you arrive- administered early when you are just beginning to have contractions and still mobile (if you don't have an epidural) where you could just sit on the toilet for 5 minutes. Then by the time you were pushing there wouldn't be any suprises. That is just how I envision it though.