Jezebel
Dear Dr. Ronald Kahn of Harvard Medical School: Your new study is amazing. You found that subcutaneous fat (that's fat right under the skin, for those who don't know) which accumulates around the hips and bottom may offer protection against diabetes. Love it! See, researchers have always known that fat in the abdomen — visceral fat — can raise a person's risk of diabetes and heart disease. Duh. But pear-shaped people (cough!) are less prone to these problems. So, Dr. Kahn, it was sheer genius when you decided to conduct experiments on mice. Because you found that subcutaneous fat transplanted into their bellies cause the mice to lose weight and show improved blood sugar and insulin levels. Crazy, right? Even crazier is what you said about fat:
Some reporter interviewed you about the improvement in metabolism in the lab mice. You said,
"I think it's an important result because not only does it say that not all fat is bad, but I think it points to a special aspect of fat where we need to do more research."Not all fat is bad? Seriously, Dr. Kahn. I think I love you. But more research is needed? Sigh. I don't even know what to think anymore. One day thin is in; the next day the French are passing laws against promoting skinny. One day fat is bad; the next day it's good! In any case, I'm totally psyched that I — and many other women — have the "right" kind of fat. For now.
Love,
Kim Kardashian.
Comments
the title of this post is making me lol.
The protection my subcutaneous fat provides is neutralized by the danger posed by my visceral fat.
I'm shaped like an "S."
Oprah's going to be happy to hear this. Now she can finally stop with all the yo-yo dieting.
I thought I needed my fat to keep me warm?
The junk in my trunk: fightin' the diabeetus since 1985.
Well, at least now the Black Eyed Peas know what to do with all that junk, all that junk inside that trunk.
Ohh and they recently discovered that a high fat diet can help epilepsy. Go fat! We apologise for all the insults and denying your disease busting properties, all is forgiven.
Ahahah to Love,
Kim Kardashian.
god bless my cuban ass
Seems like the natural corollary to the idea that people who carry a lot of weight in their tummies are more prone to metabolic syndrome. So, tummy fat=bad, butt fat=good?
I dont think Kim wrote this letter at all! Visceral?, subcutaneous? HARVARD MEDICAL SCHOOL?
I call shenanigans!
I love the title of this post.
"Oh.My.God. Becky, look at that her butt. It is so big."
My arse is fighting heart disease as we speak.
and what do they say about upper arm flab?
I have an important butt-fat-related question. I wore a jersey dress this weekend with a thong, and my cousin told me my butt wasn't rock hard, and I therefore needed to wear panties with a butt. But boy shorts ride up, and other panties give me a VPL. Is a jiggly butt all that bad? And does anyone know whether Kim Kardashian is wearing a thong, spanx, or none of the above?
I'm assuming, of course, that medical-grade silicone doesn't provide quite the same protections.
Well, this really sucks for me, since I always build fat in my belly. If only there were a way to direct it to my ass instead. Then, I'd be golden.
@funnyface:
So I guess my boyfriend has been right all along about my fat ass being a good thing.
I just always equate that thing back there with me being unable to fit into any jeans with fancy pockets.
My fat butt is good for my health? BRB out to buy a candy bar.
You can do side-bends or sit ups!
But please don't lose that butt!
If you have both, do they cancel eachother out...? Is this a fat math equation?
So you gots to be little in the middle and have much back?
I can get down with that.
@businesspearl:
When you find out let me know. No matter what I do that little flap of fat is always there waving in my face. If a similar article comes out about arm flab, it will be the only way I can tolerate it.
@biscuitdoughjones: get you drunk off my lady lumps!
@dictator4life1: go with the Spanx.
@SinisterRouge: his anaconda don't want none unless you got buns huh.
@dictator4life1: herve leger dresses might as well be spanx
@dictator4life1:
She is rocking the Spanx, I believe. And yeah, I tend to wear thongs when I'm wearing something that would show a panty line, but it is made of a thick fabric, like jeans.
If you don't want the "ZOMG I can't breathe!" feeling of Spanx, the jiggle from the thong, or boy shorts, then I suggest you just cut up a pair of regular hose.
I have a gut. Like a dude. I'm going to die.
@biscuitdoughjones: Now, if only we knew what to do with all that breast, all that breast inside our shirt.
@dictator4life1: Tell your cousin to stop staring at your arse.
@dictator4life1: Tell your cousin to quit staring at your ass and worry about her own. Or the welfare of her country. Or the plight of the Burmese.
And KK admits to sportin the Spanx alot, so chances are she prob has it on above.
give me a sister, can't resist her. red beans and rice didn't miss her.
@businesspearl: Causes AIDS.
@dictator4life1: Is your cousin male or female? I actually don't care; I'm just curious. The correct response, either way, is to kick your cousin in the shins and walk away, proudly jiggling your fabulous, not-made-of-plastic ass. That's some bullshit right there.
Memo to world: neither you nor diabetes can handle my badonkadonkdonk.
@BAngieB: "Oh.My.God. Becky, look at her butt. It is so beneficial to blood sugar and insulin levels."
@dictator4life1: Kim's gotta be wearing spanx, but you should do whatever you want. Tell your cousin she/he's just jealous cuz you're protected against diabetes and he/she isn't.
@SpicyTamale πβɸ:
So ladies YEAH, Ladies YEAH
Do you wanna roll in my Mercedes YEAH
Then turn around
Stick it out
Even white boys got to shout
Baby got back
@boring diatribes: Math is HARD!
at last. rise up, pear-shaped sisters. apparently, our time has finally come.
@bananastand: I've never understood how people like Renee Zellwegger, et al can gain weight for a film and have it be an all over situation. If I gain weight, it is in my gut. PERIOD.
@dictator4life1: Only at Muffy Van Patton's afternoon tea social by the lake is "jiggly butt" butt bad. Only those with BWC (back with a crack) need got to that. Everywhere else, you can do side-bends or sit-ups, but please don't lose that butt.
@SpicyTamale πβɸ: "Nobody knows what it means, but it's PROVOCATIVE!"
@Skinny Bone Jones: I'm'a makemakemake make diabetes scream, make it scream!
@Kittenish:
And tell you that the butt ain't gold
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So cosmo says you're fat
Well I ain't down with that
So shake it! Shake it! Shake that healthy butt!
In the immortal words of Samwell: "What, What (In the Butt)."
@MissKittyFantastico: You've outed your inner Wilford Brimley/Bret Michaels there and I LOVE it! Thanks!
@SinisterRouge: Damn. Now I owe you a coke...
@mepo: I wish it were that easy! The ketogenic diet used to control epilepsy is very strict - no sugar; limited fluids, proteins and carbohydrates: Ketogenic Diet
@businesspearl: Same here - the Hi Helens (and enquiring minds) want to know!
*dials 1-900-Mix-A-Lot and kicks dem nasty thoughts*
Wait, does everyone here like Spanx?
The last time I wore them (under a bridesmaid dress...I was politely asked), they kept riding up and actually gave me a weird line across my stomach...I think I got the power panties. Is there a better kind? I want them to work!!!
Anyhow, I got the last laugh, as I pulled them off at the wedding while holding a glass of wine and singing Sweet Home Alabama. I just couldn't take the pain anymore.
My belly fats are sad right now.
They never get any love. Except from beer. Beer will never leave them fats.
@dictator4life1: spanx, or any other type of support undergarment is the best friend of anyone who wants to smooth out the derriere. plus, i think kim kardashian is always rocking the spanx.