"Brace yourself for a shock, theatergoers. There's no delicate way of putting this. 'Cry-Baby,' the latest Broadway musical based on a John Waters movie, is... tasteless. Why aren't you shocked? Oh, I see. You thought that I meant the show that opened last night at the Marquis Theater was in bad taste....When I said 'tasteless,' I meant without flavor: sweet, sour, salty, putrid or otherwise. This show in search of an identity has all the saliva-stirring properties of week-old pre-chewed gum. (Not to be tasteless.)" So writes New York Times critic Ben Brantley in today's paper, reviewing Cry-Baby: The Musical, the latest movie-turned-musical from John Waters. Oh well. At least the opening gave us some goodies! On hand last night were John Waters, Debbie Harry, David Byrne, Cindy Sherman, Kathleen Turner, Adam Duritz, Ricki Lake, Chris March and... Rocco DiSpirito. The full Good, Bad and Ugly of the opening of Cry-Baby: The Musical after the jump.

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The Good:

I can't really explain my love for Adam Duritz. Or for his insane suit.


Chris March gets points in my book anytime he's not wearing an outfit trimmed in human hair.


1) OMG it's David Byrne! 2) OMG it's Cindy Sherman...in Prada.


In the spirit of John Waters, I love Kathleen Turner's tacky suit.


The Bad:

I so badly want to get my hands on Debbie Harry and give her a head-to-toe makeover. Girlfriend needs to learn about Rodarte. Or Chris Benz, even! Why is she wearing such weirdly dated looks and not seeking out the best of intellectual fashion? End rant.


I want to grow up to be a crazy cat lady just Estelle Parsons.


This is not the right dress for Hairspray star Nikki Blonsky.


Dear Ricki Lake: It's not nice to steal clothes off of drag queen's backs.


Rocco DiSpirito: Looking more and more like Siegfried and Roy's lost brother every day.


The Ugly:

OK, I think John Waters looks awesome. But we all know he would be insulted if he weren't placed in this category.

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[Images via Getty.]