Jezebel
Over on the blog called The Smart Set, Paula Marantz Cohen writes a requiem for the beauty parlor. Cohen recalls an age when you went out just to get your hair did, not mani-pedi massage with full-body deforestation: "When I was growing up, my mother used to go twice a month to the beauty parlor. That was what it was called then — not the hair stylist or even the hair salon, all latter-day terms. She would have her hair cut, colored, or coiffed, and sometimes she would get a manicure. But hair and nails were the extent of it. The body that lay in between was off limits. Caring for that — whatever it might entail — happened in the privacy of the home." These days, "maintenance" often involves so much more. But why?
At first Cohen suspected the modern phenomenon of having your entire body tended to was a result of the hairy, free-wheeling '60s.
But a friend pointed out that the exposed body nowadays is a far cry from the exposed body of the 1960s. That was the era of hairy underarms and legs, frizzy unkempt hair, and bra-less breasts that sagged under macramé T-shirts. Compare this to the perfect orbs that protrude like hothouse melons from the tank tops of 70-year-olds. "Let it all hang out" has been replaced by "let it all be nicely exhibited." Walt Whitman (and his hippie successors) sang the "body electric;" we sing the "body electrolysis" — also, siliconed and liposuctioned.How did we get here? Do we blame porn? Celebrities? Magazines? Shows like Extreme Makeover? The hairless, polished, rounded-breast way we present ourselves now is surely a trend like any other, but the upkeep is troublesome. Our grandmothers got their hair done once or twice a month; foot binding was a one time thing; in the 17th century, water was considered dangerous to one's health and Louis XIV only bathed twice in his life. But, as Cohen writes, "Tending the aesthetic needs of the body can become a full-time occupation, growing more elaborate and extensive as the body ages, since it takes more effort and ingenuity to resist time's sickle. It's easy to spend $300 for about three hours worth of service, which then has to be repeated in 10 days' time." The real question: Is it worth it?
Body Service [The Smart Set]
Earlier: Is There Such A Thing As Too Clean?
Comments
"The real question: Is it worth it?"
Nope. A good haircut is, a mani-pedi is nice every once and a while, but that's about it. Body hair: accept it.
"The real question: Is it worth it? "
No. Obvs.
Oh yeah, I forgot that I don't have to bleach my asshole myself anymore. Sweet!
@kinamoto: great minds!
Maybe it's not worth it, but I love my highlights and my manis and pedis. I have given up waxing though. That shit HURTS!
@boss_lady: KILLING me today! Well done!
A good haircut makes me feel like a million bucks. I like the occasional mani-pedi. Everything else is a waste in my opinion.
Can you imagine what beauty parlor ladies would think of people pointing their crotches at a stranger and having it all ripped off with hot wax?
"The real question: Is it worth it?" No it's not.
SO does that mean that I am living in the past? Because I only go to the beauty (yes, I call it the beauty, short for beauty parlor) every once in a while and i never get manis pedis or anything else that ends in i's. or bikini waxing.
is this why i dont have any friends?
I blame US Weekly. I am so used to seeing perfectly plucked tanned blonde bobbleheads wearing short shorts and exposing their back ribs that I almost forget women have hair other than on their head.
My deforestation routine consists of body wash and Daisy razors, all easily had for under $10 at your local friendly CVS/Walgreens/Duane Reade, so I really can't judge.
I think part of the pervasive beauty routine thing is that you're not just paying to get your nails did or your ladybits depilated - you're paying for an experience. I mean, okay, I can grab a $4 bottle of Sally Hansen at the drugstore and awkwardly paint my nails with all the grace of a lefty trying to write right-handed, but I can pay someone to make it look a lot better and add French tips. I CAN stand awkwardly in my shower with Nair or wax or a razor and try to depilate my intimate regions, or I could pay someone to remove it for me much more artfully.
I've never had a mani or a pedi, and I'm not about to let some stranger sculpt my pubic hair, but from the folks I know of who regularly get these things done, it's not so much the hair removal or the nail polish. It's the fact that you can GET these things without having to put in a lot of effort, and then enjoy them, if you have the money.
Seriously its times like these I wish I was a dude. This week I'm getting my hair did, eyebrows and bikini wax and about to spend a bucket load on product cos Ive run out. Is it worth it? Um, no. Maybe if it all didn't cost so damn much.
Uh… how many people on here is this really an issue for?
I know a couple of girls with fake nails who have a lot of upkeep, most of the women I know only go to the hair salon every 6 weeks or so, and I don't know anyone who gets regular massages. And I live in New York City.
How many people outside the fashion and entertainment industries are actually spending this much time in salons?
My grandmother Frances was a "Beautican" in Detroit. And in the black community it was quite a social setting with a warm gossipy atmosphere. Some of my fondest memories are attached to the smells of hair being pressed, greasing of the scalp, and running to the store to buy the old ladies a pop and a fried chicken snack pack!
This is called "grooming" and it's an offshoot of a couple of things. First, more people travel and when you're in Europe, you find out that women routinely get massages, exfoliation, all kinds of facials and waxing. Second, once manicure places started popping up on every corner, it was only a matter of time before women were reasoning, "if I can get a manicure, I can get waxing," and so on.
I tend to view the change from the 60's nudity to nowadays much like any corporate takeover - first they rejected the style, then they owned it but "polished it up" to make it so they could profit off them the most.
Just look at any subculture that has been taken over by the corporate world - it's all been changed up to make you feel self conscious about not looking the way that everyone says you should. This "everyone" being the media and those who swallow its bullshit, of course.
If it makes you feel good about yourself then I say, yes, it's worth it.
a good haircut: priceless.
i don't shave my legs. ever. and my sweet, beautiful boyfriend, the best man in the world, doesn't care either. nor does he have a right to, because he looks like a woolly mammoth from behind.
if men can be hairy, SO CAN WE.
that's all i got.
It's a lot more complicated these days because there is a media-set expectation that women should be beautiful.
If one needed the full body treatment that is available now in order to be pretty back in the 50's and 60's, they would have nicely referred to you as "homely, but with a lovely personality."
Now it is "acceptable" to be bitchy and beautiful.
Is it worth it?
No.
There is a line between looking pretty and false advertising, and I am not about to devote my time or money to perpetuating the latter.
For chrissakes, if I can't be bothered to make the bed every morning, I certainly can't be bothered to get myself 100% waxed every two weeks.
(haircut, yes. special-occasion mani/pedi, sometimes. ow-my-back massage, when I can afford it. Electrolysis? hell no.)
@boss_lady: Because you've spent so much time in the tanning bed that now everything is one color? That kills two unrealistic beauty birds with one superficial stone!
My mom never went to the beauty parlor, she has worked outside her entire life (actual, job related work) and at 50 something, she looks awesome. No her face isn't like Nicole Kidman's, but who wants that? All plastic and shiny? Her skin is tan, and yes there are some wrinkles, but she dresses well and skips make-up, but never looks sloppy. I try and follow in her footsteps. Message of this story, skip the beauty parlor and go for a walk or something, there's a whole world out there. jeez
How much does it have to do with America's obsession with cleanliness? We are also obsessed with disinfecting our entire world.
Same boat here - regular cuts and colors and the occassional pedi as a treat. I'll machete my own forest thanks.
Worse yet is that I'll abstain from getting my hair did for months so that I can eat and pay rent... you know, gotta take care of some things even though I can't run a comb through my ends after a shower.
That's 'cuz you got "good hurr" Dodai, you don't need to get yo' kitchen hit on the daily! ;-)
I like my beauty regimens. I have so little "me" time, I enjoy taking the time to get pampered. I used to have bad acne, so I am ardent about keeping my skin in great condition. My morning ritual only takes about 5 minutes or so. I get the hair did once a week. The nails get did once a week too, and as a former nail biter manis have been my saving grace. Toes get did every 2 or 3 weeks. I get the brows and lip threaded bi-weekly, and a bikini wax once every 6-8 weeks. But I like (and can afford) to do these things, so there. :-PPPP
@angryblackgurl: which side of town?
My mom goes to the beauty parlor once a week. She takes them my hand-me-down copies of People and Us Weekly, and all the ladies sit and exchange polite tidbits. It's as much an outing as it is maintenance.
@AthertonMerriweather: I agree. It's worth it if it makes you feel beter about yourself and doing it for yourself rather than anybody else.
I do have to say I love getting my hair did, there is no nicer feeling than someone washing your hair.
Just reading all that stuff exhausts me. Who the hell has time for all that? I'll take the inconvenience of shaving every three days (ok, once a week) over having losing a whole afternoon for this stuff.
I get my hair cut about every three months. I've had my eyebrows waxed once, and I just keep them up myself. I get a manicure if my hands desperately need it (maybe once, twice a year) and/or my mom is paying. I stay away from pedicures because those foot tubs are gah-ross.
I thought these were normal practices and anything else was excessive, no?
@virtualcatlady (formerlycuteasabutton): Haha, I was all pissy this morning because it's finally nice enough out to wear a skirt without tights, and I realized I HAD to shave my legs before leaving the house. I was so bummed.
I'm also mad that I have to buy a $4 can of mousse since I'm out.
I totally wished I was a dude today.
@AnderBobo: Yes! Hair grows everywhere! I accidently got some Nait on part of my arm and my arm fuzz wiped clean. I started to think--for the first time ever--that Damn! my arms are hairy! just because they aren't hairless.
Then I blinked and my senses returned. Just one more week until my arm hair is even-steven.
agreed to the feel of a great haircut; and the occasional mani-pedi, but I take care of my in-between myself. I'm not really comfortable exposing myself to strangers like that.
I do all of these things, waxing, manis, pedis, etc but I try to do most of it myself to cut down on cost. The only thing I wont do is highlight or cut my hair. I have highlighted it before, but it is never, never as good as having it done in the salon.
Otherwise, a brazilian once every 4 months, then I do touchups myself. For clogged body pores, use those exfoliating gloves or add about 2 cups sugar to your body wash. Buy cuticle nippers and do your hands and feet yourself. I think this is enough to be well groomed without spending 300 dollars every 10 days. Because that is ridiculous.
@virtualcatlady (formerlycuteasabutton): Ohhh...There's nothing like a good head massage. I want to get my haircut now.
I get tired just thinking of shaving my legs......sigh.
it's an industry - the magazines make us feel bad about our body hair so they can get advertising money from nair, etc.
Is it worth it? if you do it to make yourself feel good about yourself, then yes. If you do it because you feel pressure from "society" then no
I don't shave my legs for anyone but me. I like the way they feel, and I shave them fairly regularly (though not religiously) even though my dear boyfriend is on another continent. Am I the only one?
I will admit that the appeal of getting my hair did is lost on me, primarily because my hair does one thing only. And that is LAY THERE and be fine and straight and refuse to do much of anything.
What would a hairdresser do, psychoanalyze it? pet it?
@virtualcatlady (formerlycuteasabutton): the cost is the biggest deterrent for me. i get my hair touched up regularly but do my nails at home. if i'm going to spend cash at a salon, i'd prefer a massage. the rest is just baloney.
I don't know, going to the beauty parlor twice a month seems quite excessive to me! I have unruly hair, and have never paid for a blow-out that didn't come with a haircut...I just rock the whole disheveled thing. Do real women actually do more than just your basic monthly bikini wax, and bi/tri monthly haircut? If so, tell me why and where you find the time?
@virtualcatlady (formerlycuteasabutton): So don't. Don't get the bikini wax. Get a nice haircut, but skip the rest. If you wish you were a dude because "they don't have to do this," that should tell you that you are doing something unnecessary--if guys don't do it and there isn't an underlying biological reason, then girls shouldn't do it, either.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. "...the perfect orbs that protrude like hothouse melons from the tank tops of 70-year-olds"? What?! I don't see any grandma with boobs that could be described as such. Am I missing something??
I get a haircut twice a year, highlights once. I do my own mani-pedis when I feel like it. I also do my own hair removal. And STILL, it's too much for me. It's BS. Thank GOD, it's a trend. But when will it be over?
I get my hair did about once every three months. I love my hair, so I will always treat myself to a professional cut and color.
The first time I had a mani/pedi was for my wedding two years ago. I liked it a lot - I can never do a thing with my finger nails myself (they're too round to grow long) and my at-home pedis are never quite as slick looking. The foot/calf massage that came with the pedi kicked ass too. However, being that it was my wedding, I was forced to endure the idle chit chat/gleeful screaming of the manicurist. Once she realized I wasn't the gushing type (and once she asked me to describe my wedding dress and I told her it was a black satin number) she turned a cold shoulder. Didn't exactly make me eager to return.
I've only had one other mani/pedi since, and that was a treat from my husband. I like the results... but to shell out the cash and the time (and my sanity)? I don't know if it's worth it on a regular basis.
As for waxing. Never have, never will. Once you start, you have to maintain, right? Better off not starting.
@lurkystars: When people such as yourself and other commentators realize there's no damn point in buying into the idea. The more people who realize that they're live human adults, the better.
@JessicaLovejoy wholly endorses The Pocket Deep Fryer!: *shudder*
I've never had a manicure, a pedicure, a massage, or a waxing. The only one of those I'm even willing to do is a massage. Which I'll be doing soon, since hubs just got me a gift certificate.