Jezebel
My brother is only 16, but he is very wise. Recently, upon hearing a grown-up-type person bitch up her job, he replied, "Well, it's called 'work' for a reason." At this moment I said a little prayer of thanks that my parents had imparted to the kid that, in life, you have to work hard, and working hard isn't always sexy. This sort of sentiment, however, is absent among many of the Gen Y-ers currently entering the workforce, claims Lisa Belkin in today's New York Times. The kids nowadays are all worried about "passion" and "life mapping," and less concerned with, oh, putting in the hours and being the best damn alphabetizer/stapler/photocopy-er they can be. Says Daniel Pink, (whose book The Adventures of Johnny Burko is supposed to teach young adults that hard work is a good thing): "This generation has been spoon-fed self-esteem cereal for the past 22 years. They've been told it's all about them — what they want, what they are passionate about, what they find fulfilling. That's not a bad message, but it's also not a complete message."
I spoke with an acquaintance who just graduated from college last May, and is about eight months into her first-ever job. I asked her, now that the stress of the first six months and figuring out the lay of the land, how she likes her work. "I answer the phone and file things," she said. "You don't need a college degree to do what I do. It's stupid that I am in this job." This answer told me nothing about how she enjoyed the nature of her work; whether the field she had chosen to go into was interesting to her, whether she was learning things from those above her, being exposed to a way of thinking or a process she had not encountered before. I knew nothing of how she liked her work, only that she didn't enjoy the process of working. "Maybe I'll become a party-planner," she then said, "That seems fun."
Pink says this is why this generation needs rules, and Belkin herself points out that it's not just the young in need of a little reality slap, but their parents, noting how she received a letter from a reader who "described her daughter, who will be graduating from college next month, as paralyzed by the fear that whatever job she takes would not be her passion and would therefore be wrong. "How can I help her find her life's calling?" the mother wondered." I will save Lisa Belkin the time of answering this one: Dear Mama and Daughter, Chillax.
There is no perfect job. As my dad has always told me, as long as your work is not immoral, unethical, or illegal — well, then it's good work. Sure, hopefully you find it interesting, but there is no make-believe land where you are rewarded daily with gold stars, and championed for your "passion" for merely showing up and breathing air. But if you work hard and at the end of the day can be proud of what you did — well then, you done good.
Prepping Children for the 9 to 5 [New York Times]
Comments
every year we get a new crop of entitled interns at my office. they all are very surprised when they actually have to contribute and not get everything handed to them.
grr.
self esteem cereal? hahayum.
I know the perfect job- being rich. I would eat bon-bons, design jewelry, take beautiful photographs and pay someone to help me stay thin.
Yes please I can haz?
Your brother is awesome Jessica! Smart kid!
Sure, work is work, but if you hate it you wouldn't have to do it. At my old office we had a starbucks application pinned to the bulletin board that we would often reference as an alternative when things got stressful, as if to say, I'm only going to keep doing this as long as it makes me happier than working at starbucks would make me.
my job is not personally fulfilling, but it keeps me in books and the kitties in kibble, so it'll do just fine for now. suck it up, people!
Hm. This kind of shamed me to be goofing off on Jezebel instead of actually working.
I would like my job a whole lot more if I worked with Dolly, Jane, and Lily. It's like Night of the Living Dead in my office.
@Philthyist is still waiting...: i want that job too. but if i was rich i would actually do something I really love but cant afford to do now.
Like start up a dog rescue. my husband and I really wanna do that.
@CMG: This is what I tell people who scoff at my job. It pays the rent, yo!
Thank you for writing about this today. I needed it as I contemplate two potential jobs as I complete grad school. And, as always, the decision really comes down to passion v. paying the mortgage.
yeah, im so that kid.
i hate my job and feel that im way above doing it. i do not like having to pick up my boss' suit after it's been altered. i don't like making them dinner reservations for a family outing. do. not. like.
its not that im above hard work.. i just dont feel like wasting my time being miserable, when i could be doing something that makes me happy. (or happier at least.)
In all honesty, I am mind-numbingly lazy and the thought of a "real job," like, in an office (gasp), gave me panic attacks--staying in academia is not just what I want to do, it's what I need to do. This is a source of serious shame and confusion and anger for my mother, and I have to say she's not wrong.
The best career advice I've heard: "Any profession that you'll have no problem getting up every morning to do for the rest of your life is a good career."
Actually, at my job (which is just a college job, but still) we do get "gold stars" for a job well done. Yes, sometimes I feel like I'm in kindergarten. But I really like my job, so, whatevs.
I find this to be one of the things that amuses me about many of the younger people I meet (and many of my own age group): this idea that your work has to be intimately connected to your happiness. I grew up understanding that work is, well, work -- you can't go trying to find some deep meaning in it. It would be nice, but that's what the rest of your life is for.
@BeckyIva: That's my philiosophy exactly! ...I'm getting close to applying at the 'bucks.
I get so surprised when people don't experience their first job until college or afterwards. I've been working since I was 16, everything from office work, retail (grocery stores and Target), waitressing, and back to office work. If my career even remotely deals with something I'm interested in like NGO work, whether I'm removing staples or making copies, I'm going to be happy because I can pay my rent. Thanks mom for teaching me to work.
Although if you only worry about being the best damn alphabetizer/stapler/photocopyier you can be, you might be stuck being the best damn alphabetizer/stapler/photocopyier until you retire. Sometimes resenting your job inspires you to work harder outside of work.
Also, after earning my fascinating but pretty much useless degree in Drama from a hoity toity art school, I went out and got a job as an IT Business Analyst, based on my experience working in my college library. At the same time, my classmates were scrambling for jobs temping and waiting tables. I figure, it's the same 40 hours a week I would put in doing anything else, it's interesting, the pay is great, and I still get to work on tons of theatre... Why worry about "paying my dues" in some crappy minimum wage position?
Oh, I hope my assistant is reading this. She needs to learn.
I think for my generation, I'm 23, there was so much pressure to get the perfect education and then the perfect internship and then the perfect job. And close to two years after graduating most of my friends are in relatively low paying, non-passion inducing jobs. I think when you are in school and young you think there is this real desire for educated young people in the workplace, and then when you step foot in the workplace you realize it is like all you have is a piece of paper. Kind of sad.
i don't know --- i'm from that generation and i bust my ass nonstop. i think it comes down to how you were raised.
@jenalicious: hello, me. i spent four years in college so my boss could say things like "now, i want you to send out an email to the sales staff. you know how to do that, right? go to your email and hit *new."
fortunately, i'm leaving for grad school this august.
@LauraNOLA: A buddy of mine took time off from grad school and worked in telemarketing, which has got to be it's own rung of hell. After that, he had taken care of some of his debts before returning for the PhD with a renewed gratitude.
[Let's just preface this by saying I'm so glad to have something to talk about other than whatshername at Yale. *tries to erase memory immediately*)
I totally think (uppermiddleclass, elite-educated, probs mostly white) GenYs suffer from this problem. Of course it's a little like Betty Friedan bemoaning the poor, rich white women who don't have to work & can just hang out with their kids [oversimplifying for sake of arg]........but w/in the context of that very narrow slice of the population--yeah, it's totally a problem. I can def relate... I am technically still in school & can for the moment afford only to take jobs that are "worth my time" but this is A, a fucked up way of approaching work, and B, kind of paralyzing, because it's obviously impossible to find that mythical occupation where you only ever do things you enjoy & find fulfilling. Indeed, your brother is right: there's a reason they call it "work." Not sure how that got lost...
Pink said that? Maybe he just mizzundastood.
I think I was cynical even as a child, because I remember a few kids in elementary school that said they wanted to be President when they grew up, and I just knew there was no way in hell that would be possible (but this was before Dubya).
That being said, I do think your acquaintance's remark did tell you something about her job.
I approached my current position (sort of staff member with a law firm) with all zealousness in the beginning. I had worked my way through college, and knew that it wouldnt be glam. But I was looking frwd to learning all I could, taking on extra tasks, etc.
Bottom line is - in a lot of offices now, there is no real room for vertical growth. Any job above me can be filled with a more experienced baby-boomer (and they apply by the hundreds). So yeah, I fill out forms and make letters, etc. They don't want me to move up yet because they still need someone to do this job.
@dummyfakeroller: yeah, see my problem is that im stuck in a crap job in an industry (finance) that i despise. i would be more than happy to do a crap job where i feel like something good is coming out of it, somewhere up the ladder.
i too worked since i was 15, in various restaurant jobs, and gave it up about 2 years ago when i decided i needed to get a "real job".
im quitting in a month to go back to bartending. because its awesome and makes me far happier.
@BeckyIva: Yes, and what if you work at Starbucks? I am a barista and quitting in two weeks... I can't tell you how good that feels. A true inspiration for when I'm in a "big girl job" and think of the alternative.
@jenalicious:I'm that kid too. I hate my job and I do feel like I deserve something better. There is a difference between accepting that you have to work and staying in a situation that is miserable.
I like my job because it allows me to read Jezebel for several hours a day. Really, things could be a lot worse.
As a Gen Y-er who is terrified of graduating and ending up in a job she hates, I'd like to offer a little more perspective.
I'm very willing to work, but have already worked hard for years hoping to achieve something great. It's not just parents praising me every time I get an A, it's years of AP classes and extra curricular activities that would seem depressing if I ended up stapling shit. A lot of young people are taught to believe they need to work extra extra hard all the time, and they will reap rewards. College and high school is incredibly competitive for some people, and gets more so all the time.
I'm not expecting to get paid for doing nothing! I just don't want to realize in a couple years that I spent an hour doing Arabic vocab this morning and a summer doing Chinese in order to file stuff in the Mid West. Or something.
I am very proud of my staple abilities, however.
I agree with all this stuff, and I also agree that sometimes you have to put in your grunt hours in order to get to the top. You may think you know everything, but those who do know much more find your attitude annoying.
Newsflash, folks. There's a reason they have to bribe you to show up.
@BeckyIva: Working at Starbucks will NOT make you happy. Ever. Take it from me.
I also graduated last May and am at my first real job. It involves a lot of boring administrative type work but I love it because I can read Jezebel and look at icanhascheesburger all day.
There were a handful of unemployed months immediately following graduation. All of that free time did nothing but cause a complete emotional breakdown.
I conduct my soul-searching on weekends, gotta pay rent!
@lastsinglestanding: please lord tell me you're nice to your assistant!!! im exec assistant to two guys. one is constantly busy and i am more than happy to occasionally help with personal things.
the other sits in his office re-organizing business cards and twidling his thumbs and expects me to plan his family vacations. needless to say, i pretty much resent him a lot for it.
"How can I help her find her life's calling?" the mother wondered.
My parents supported me when I went to school (and then grad school) for two fine arts degrees, knowing that I'd have to work a 9-5 job that was not "creative writing" to pay my bills and get health insurance. They encouraged me to study what I loved, but reminded me of the realities that I'd face when it was time to get a "real job".
So work, to me, is separated into two jobs: the one that pays the bills, and the one that keeps me sane.
My job at the library is my day job. My writing is my "I don't get paid for this but I still treat it like a" night job.
My hardest work is usually done when I leave my job for the day to go home and try to make those degrees worth something.
Being a college freshman, i find this very interesting. See, personally I feel it is important to do something you love, because my mom's career as a journalist is just that. She absolutely loves what she does, but at the same time, she worked SO hard to get where she is.
I don't see the harm in wanting to do something you are passionate about, so long as you aren't choosing it, because you think it will be easy, etc.
@dummyfakeroller: Ditto and Amen and all of that.
I hate my job as a personal assistant. All I really want is that stupid, boring, passionless job that requires stapling and filing. The problem is that I can't make more than $30K doing that. Either that, or I can't FIND those jobs in Chicago.
A few years ago, my sister and her friends were discussing my sister's new job, which was graveyard shift at the post office. She had been late everyday, and they were threatening to let her go. Her friends were shocked, telling her, "They're lucky you come in at all! They should be thank you." Apparently the thought that people work at night was so novel that these girls felt that simply taking the job deserved kudos.
My last job, I had to hire and train new employees, and I was a bit taken back about the attitudes of many of the younger applicants. They wanted to start off in management right out, with no job experience, and never work nights or weekends, and have off every Steeler game (this was Pittsburgh), and get paid twice the minimum. If we did hire someone, invariably they quit after one day, complaining that it was too much work, or was beneath them.
Cue Cartman: How do I reach these keeeeds?
Um fuck this noise. I'm so tired of people calling my generation lazy, or to idealistic or whatever. Everyone I know currently has to work 2 jobs just to keep ubove water. But... we're doing it, we're working non-stop and it's not wrong to want a better, challenging, interesting job, and I think people should be congratulated, not ridiculed, in their search for work that they like. And that's what it is a constant search. So lay off baby-boomers.
Yeah, the concept of paying your dues is foreign to a lot of recent college grads, and it 's hard for them to adjust to the idea that they don't know everything. A bit of humility and knowing when to keep your mouth shut is a good thing, kids.
Newsflash: You don't know how to run Company X just because you got an A in business management.
My job is personally fulfilling. But you know what? I do a lot of crappy administrative work. I wake up at 4am in a panic that somebody won't have their health insurance card on time or that we forgot to file a form with a federal agency.
And I spent 2 years after college filing, processing checks and printing out letters.
I would like some self-esteem cereal. I think it would go wonderfully with my medications.
Work is just work; its not your life. If by chance you are fortunate to do something you love, good for you. But that's not how is usually is. I've been working since I was 12 years old (family business back then) and am now facing being out-of-work for the first time since then, as the company I work for has been bought out and I will be laid off soon. As much as I'd like to find something to be "passionate" about, I don't think reading history and babying our cats is going to pay the bills. As long as the job is interesting enough to make the day go by fast, that's fine with me.
As someone who's been in a state of semi-permanent panic since graduating 5 (!) years ago I can kind of relate. If you like the general idea of what you do it makes all the crappy day to day work less bad.
maybe it's because I'm trying to get info the film business, but I (and most of my friends) understand the concept of "paying your dues".
my mother, actually, is the one who thinks I should be doing more. I haven't even been out of college a year! I consider myself lucky I'm not still interning.
I needed to hear this because I haaaaate law school and don't even want to be a lawyer. (DOn't ask why I'm in law school) But I got to put in work to get where I want to be. End of story.
@SpicyTamale: Jewelry and photography are two things I really love and would prefer to do them for pleasure, not money.
but you're right, I will do something worthy as well....
le sigh.
Spicy Tamale reminds me of my moral duties.
@katieb has landed: Whoa, comment lag! there weren't any when I started so I'm cursing the article. Just to be clear.
Work is work, but some working conditions are awful. Like my current position. So if I feel like complaining about it, I will. Wait 'til you actually been in the workforce more than a year before handing out sage advice.
@and Begorrah: Oof. Telemarketing? I gotta say, my mortgage paying option isn't bad at all. Just not my "passion" or whatever. I'm pretty lucky, I guess.
I would have to make millions and/or be nearly homeless before accepting a telemarketing position.
@jenalicious: I try to be as nice as I can be, but there is a definite line between "friend" and "boss."
I don't demean her. I don't make her pick up my dry cleaning or my lunch or anything like that, but I get pissed off when I ask her to do something well within her job description (like making a list of contacts) and she scoffs and tells me that she doesn't have enough time to do it. It's like, it's not a request, ya know?
For the most part, she's a good kid and this is her first job and I want her to do well. But good lord, some days it is taxing.
Yeah, I'm not going to lie: We think we are smart. We think we are the best. And all the time my peers and I have discussion where we cannot believe that we have to start in entry level positions.
It doesn't help that there a lot of successful people who are making bank before 25. The kids at Connected Ventures or Mark Zukerburg for example.
Actually, I am, in fact, a party planner, and I'd be glad to detail the less than glamarous realities of event planning. It too involves insane amounts of paperwork, filing, and stapling. Trust. And when you are actually working an event, you're doing just that, working. You are way too stressed about conducting the madness to actually have any fun. Just saying, the grass isn't actually all that much greener over here.
"self-esteem cereal"
The is a huge difference between self-esteem & narcissism. Self-esteem is built on successes, learning experiences and overcoming adversary. It is solid. It does not rely on the perceptions or actions of other people.
Narcissism is expecting accolades because you happen to exist. It's a flimsy platform on which to base superiority and so is often accompanied by deep insecurities. Which in turn causes more dramatic displays of entitlement. It's a circular trap that is difficult to escape. Especially beca