Jezebel
Fergie! Why hello dear, you've been on an awful lot of our magazine covers lately! Is it because, being a former meth-addicted derelict, you make for such a candid, forthcoming interview? No! You're keeping "private life private" as they say, and good for you, by which I mean fuck you...well wait, perhaps I'm being unfair: there was the admission that you take shots of vinegar to aid digestion. Dropping them regularity bombs there, Fergieferg! ANYWAY, so this month's Glamour was about as good as a canister of Metamucil. My personal favorite part was the "How To Be Confident" package, which included a list of "things you would say to a baby that you should say to yourself." (Sample: "oooh what a cute squishy butt!") (Yes I wish I were kidding.) After the jump we go through all the lines to make them more "accurate." But mostly to amuse ourselves.
