Jezebel
Nita, far left, is 13 years old, and is readying herself to lose her virginity to a stranger and become a prostitute. The man who will eventually have sex with her for the first time could — her family hopes — pay as much as $1,200 for the "right" to her virginity, and, according to this article, "can have access to the girl for as long as he likes - several hours, days, or even weeks." Nita, explains the story, "has signed up for a life in which she will deal with 20 to 30 clients per day, until she reaches her forties. After that, when she is no longer considered desirable, she will depend on any children she may have for support." [Telegraph]
10:45 AM on Tue Apr 15 2008
By Anna
8,929 views
125 comments
Comments
Why is it 2008 and this still happens?
Oh, my heart aches.
horrible.
These are the stories that make my liberal ass say "Sweat shops aren't so bad, are they?"
This is a different p.o.v. (and an earlier one (as in, an earlier part of their lives)) of the community addressed in "Born Into Brothels." If you haven't seen it, you should -- it's an excellent documentary.
Damn and I was working on not being bitter today.
How is this legal? How can her parents let this happen? How can the journalist refrain from adopting her, taking her home and playing Mall Madness?
...and once again I can count on Jezebel for the pre-noon stomach punch to my soul.
A heart weeps... a soul cries... another flower dies.
Oh, it gets worse. They make less than $5 for anytime after the first. And its considered unlucky to keep the big bucks from the first time, so they spend it on a party? oh, oh, oh.
thank you, i was feeling crappy becuase my apt sucks and my bathtub isn't running....how pitiful my problems seems.
13 is to young to sell yourself. It's too young to be having sex period.
It is depressing. But honestly, things are getting better in India - more women working at offices, getting paid the same as men, waiting to get married, and more sex education. But still, so many girls and women fall through the cracks.
Has anyone seen this documentary about this subject?
i find it more disturbing that this is considered a good choice and she's "happy" about it.
@ArmCandy: i love mall madness
I feel sick.
The young boy at the end of that story is my hero.
:::cries:::
In reading the article, I don't understand why these girls go into prostitution instead of marrying. It would seem that marrying would also get a large lump sum of money. Am I missing something? Help!
You know, I wasn't going to comment further, but something occured to me and I think it's worth saying:
I don't actually have a problem with prostitution. Prostitution is among the oldest industries in human history, and it has the potential to be both a humane (at least) and profitable trade. Using the example of The Netherlands (which does so many things better than us), prositution is an industry which is entered into only by adults, completely voluntarily, and which comes with the same kind of benefits package as a more traditional job -- health and dental insurance, state-covered regular STD testing and gynocological appointments, income taxes and tax refunds, etc. etc. The women in Holland who work as prostitutes seem, generally, to be happy and healthy, raising real families and having husbands and kids and wide social circles.
Things like that make me adamant that if countries were more accepting of their sex trades, great strides could be made in the treatment and lives of the women who are the core of the industry.
Of course, that kind of argument has no application here. These are young girls, with no other options, essentially being sold into a sex trade that they have little to no choice but to participate in. It's appalling. I have no idea how to solve a problem like this, other than to say that if we can just stop denying the prevalence of the sex trade around the world, perhaps we can begin to improve it.
That said, India is a rough, rough place to be young and poor.
caste-based prostitution? Come on India, get it together.
Ack. That article was really disheartening. I'd go hide in my bed if I could, but I'm at work.
Poverty sucks. Poverty makes people sell their children into slavery of all kinds, including sexual slavery. I am not sure that sexual slavery is necessarily better or worse than other kinds of slavery. Is the girl who is forced to have sex with strangers better or worse off than the boy who is forced to work back-breaking hours amid toxins? Poverty sucks.
Can we raise the $1,200? Seriously, I have a check with her name on it if it means she can keep her virginity as long as she wants.
I recently read a really good book about something quite similar, I believe it was called "The Dancing Girls of Lahore." They often send their daughters off to richer countries like UAE or Kuwait to lose their virginity to princes for a few thousand dollars. It's heartbreaking.
[www.amazon.com]
@BlondeGrlz: That would be "one." What of the others? The ones who aren't featured in an international story?
@jemandtheholograms: Happy, or resigned to the fact she has little choice. It also probably looks like a game to her young eyes, but her prettiness value will be quickly worn away.
Ugh. And the AIDS rate in India. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.
Oh honey, I will adopt you. This is so wrong and sad.
Jesus.
Why do I want to go all "Lorena Bobbit" on the ass(es) of the men who perpetuate this barbarism? I'd also like to make the parents take a long walk off a short pier!
Geez, I was hoping for a lighthearted happy article, Jezebel. PLEEEEEESE? I already woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning :(
I am not sure that marriage is so much better than prostitution for these girls, considering that wives can be virtually enslaved by their husband's family. It's sad all around. At least take the $1200 and go to school! I don't have a problem with informed adults prostituting themselves, but education opens up so many more options. Ugh.
@mocena:they don't marry because they are from a lower class family and cannot afford it, the family has blown it's wad on the first daughter's marriage, the family needs money NOW, or any other number of equally depressing options.
[www.amazon.com]
that's a great book about the trade of women in pakistan/indian
Officially the most depressing morning ever!
@Trashtastic Is BAAAACK: @BlondeGrlz: That's it. I want to start a foundation, with the goal of rescuing these girls. No young girl should ever have to live like this. We'd make an honest attempt to buy the family out and keep the girl(s) safe, and if that didn't work, we'd go paramilitary on their asses.
@stoprobbers: oh, that documentary is heartbreaking. first, the documentary maker is able to get most of the boys and girls into schools, and then, most of them decide to leave. whether they left on their volition, or if their families forced them to go, it's equally tragic.
not condoning child prostitution by any means, but this part of the article was really really interesting:
"Two of her sisters, Ritu, 35, and Manju, 25, have built one of the few stone houses in their village, for which they paid the equivalent of £14,600, and are proud of their success. "There was a lot of poverty, we had nothing to eat," said Manju. "What you see now has come with hard work." They support 50 family members - 35 children and 15 adults."
@stacyinbean: you beat me to it!
i took that down to the beach last summer...not exactly beach reading, but a great book none-the-less
@tragicallyunhip: Thanks. :) I felt like I was probably missing something rather large.
@stacyinbean: I was just going to recommend that book! The author did a great job of getting at the personal lives and reasons for decisions. I still think about a few of the people mentioned (especially the youngest daughter).
@effeteaesthete: According to the article, the $1,200 is spent on a huge party, because it it considered unlucky to keep the money from your first time.
Oh microfinance, you have the power to save us all! Praise Muhammad Yunus and the Grameen Bank!
[en.wikipedia.org]
@stoprobbers:
The problem is, even in countries where the sex trade is highly regulated, you will have an underground, illegal trade.
Prostitution is depressing. Child prostitution is depressing. But seriously? WEEKS? Some pervent can keep her for WEEKS. This is human bondage to a T.
@I.Can. Haz.Black.Editors?: @tragicallyunhip: I think the saddest part was how the mother felt so useless (and was treated that way too) because she was no longer wanted or able to prostitute herself, and had to send the daughters out to do it. It's amazing what they went through.
Makes my IRS issues seem minimal...
@kshenkshen: I think the article presents it as a career choice, like these women chose to be dentists or teachers. In reality, it was probably a lack of choice that led them to prostitution. Good for them for making it work and supporting their families, but really, who can put a price on a 13 year old's virginity?
I'm actually pretty sure I've seen this place. Last year I went to India. Our group was traveling from Jaipur to Agraby bus and about an hour before we entered Agra our guide told us we should look to the left because there was a big attraction to be seen. He then laughed and said there were prostitutes here.
What I saw were girls wearing lots of make-up, standing on the side of the road. I only catched a glimps, because the bus was moving fast, but I could see that some of the girls couldn't have been older than 14. The guide thought he had been very funny, but the image of those girls didn't leave my mind.
Interesting to read the story behind this place. I'm sad for the girls, but knowing some of the poverty in this area I can say they have know other option.
I know this stuff should make me very upset (and it does), but after working with an international women's rights organization for a year, I grew far too used to this kind of story. Even watching a documentary last night about how women in Algeria aren't allowed to leave their homes to go grocery shopping and grow up used to being "disciplined" by their brothers and fathers for bringing potential dishonor to their parents, I wasn't shocked. I'm still outraged, though. The patriarchy blows.
12000 Rupees not dollars, right? So it actually comes out to like $300.
I've been to that town. It's incredibly poor. All of India is incredibly poor. There is no other solution...
@lms11: Bullshit.
the odd thing about the story is the mixed feelings of the older prostitutes - some are proud of how they are able to take care of their family and others don't want their children to lead this kind of life.
even sadder is that these kids are born into these families and born into this circumstance with no real choice in the matter.
the posters of the women in those rooms are beyond creepy - bollywood stars and the like.
@roxanneismyalterego: three cheers for dr. yunus!
the grameen bank/micro-finance is such a great system...i really hope good people keep running those institutions.
This is exactly like Pretty Baby, only not a movie and ONE MILLION TIMES WORSE.
@tragicallyunhip: "But in the villages around Bharatpur there is a shortage of girls to marry, and the custom is for the boy's family to pay the girl's family a large lump sum before the wedding can take place."
Which makes this whole thing seem even weirder.
Also, one of the older sisters of this girl has a daughter and says she will not let her go into the trade because it's not a good life- which is great- but she's still happy to let her 13 y.o. sister do it? :(
@BlondeGrlz: i totally agree. the horrible depressing part is that prostitution is the best way for these girls to support their (huge, extended) families. they need better job opportunities!
...Running the risk of repeating myself, I still say:
Proof that there is no God.