• Seriously? The White House Correspondents dinner must not be what we think it is, because Pamela Anderson, Lauren Conrad and Perez Hilton (and Donatella Versace) are invited. [ONTD]
  
• Newly-engaged Ashlee Simpson says her sister Jessica is "overflowing with joy" and dad Joe has given her and fiancé Pete Wentz his blessing. [People]
  
• Lily Allen was kicked out of the men's room at a club in London — and she was with Razorlight singer Johnny Borrell. [Mirror]
  
• Kate Hudson on PhotoShopping: "I just tend to let those things go. I can't tell you how many covers of magazines I've been on when my eyes were blue. I don't have blue eyes. I have green eyes. So, you just kind of go with it, you know, it's like it is, what it is and that's what people do, you know." [The Star]
  
• A tabloid editor says Jay-Z and Beyoncé's wedding only made the cover of one weekly magazine because "African-Americans don't sell covers." [Gatecrasher]

• "Just good friends" Chris Brown and Rihanna were seen "hugging and dancing" at a birthday party. [Page Six]
• Madonna is expected to appear in court in Malawi in 2 weeks for a final ruling on her adoption. We all know it's gonna happen, right? She's had that kid since 2006. [Reuters]
• An Indian pandit — which is like some kinda spiritual teacher — will travel to Mexico to bless Heidi Klum and hubs Seal on their third wedding anniversary, May 10. Damn, they're so international! [Times Of India]
• Paul McCartney is going on a huge world tour in the fall, and the always-classy UK papers are calling it the "divorce tour." [Mirror]
• Heather Mills said of Paul on morning TV: "I think he's got three different girlfriends so I wish all the girls the best of luck. Better them than me." [Mirror]
• Paula Abdul's boyfriend "isn't too invested" in the relationship and "flirts with a lot of women." [MSNBC]
• Gwyneth Paltrow's mom, Blythe Danner, is swearing up and down that Gwynnie and Chris Martin are happily married. [People]
• Neil Patrick Harris doesn't want Britney back on How I Met Your Mother. "Our show does not need stunt casting in order to succeed," he says. [USA Today]
• That nude photo of Carla Bruni — shot by photographer Michel Comte in 1993 — sold for $91,000, [Guardian]
• Dolly Parton helped a young American bald eagle that had been blown from its nest return to the wild. She named the bird Liberty. "I thought that sounded better than Baldy." [Yahoo News]
• "It doesn't matter how much I get paid for something. Having integrity definitely hurts your buying sprees, but I can sleep at night." —Evan Rachel Wood. [LA Times]
• At the casting for Paris Hilton's new TV show — in which she searches for a "new BFF" — took place yesterday in New York. "It looked like Barbie threw up in there," says a source. "All the girls looked like versions of Donatella Versace. They all had bleached blond hair, too-dark tans and were wearing tight, shiny dresses. All the guys that were there were gay. The whole thing was so bizarre." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which rising young actress was informed at a recent film party that Jane Fonda wanted to meet her? "I don't give a shit," came the jaded response." [Gatecrasher]
• Alright stop. Collaborate and listen: Robert Van Winkle, better known as Vanilla Ice, was arrested last night for domestic battery. Apparently he had an argument with his wife and pushed her. [TMZ]
• Sean Diddy Combs needed five stitches after cutting his foot on a champagne glass while partying at his Miami home last weekend. Raise your hand if you want to be barefoot and sipping champagne ASAP. [TMZ]
• Ed Asner to ex-wife: Get a job. [USA Today]
• The 73-year-old 3 foot 8 inch actor who played R2D2 in Star Wars has been hospitalized. May the force be with him. [TMZ]
• OMFG have you seen the new Gossip Girl ad? [TMZ]

Send an email to Dodai, the author of this post, at dodai@jezebel.com.