You know, every time someone writes about weddings our commenters [And me. -Ed.] are all, "I would never spend any money on a wedding!" and "I can't believe anyone would lose weight for their big day, how superficial!" and "I am so unmaterialistic and wonderful I'm getting married in a burlap sack at the bottom of a big hole in the dirt because weddings are stupid and they should really be about true love and blah blah blah." But seriously? Fuck that noise. I totally want a huge-ass wedding and a pretty, poofy dress and I'll probably try to lose five pounds by joining some retarded gym program right before the wedding. There, I said it. But I promise not to go as apeshit as the women profiled today's Guardian.
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