Jezebel
- Amy Winehouse arrived at Pentonville prison for a visit with the hubs wearing a puffy heart-shaped pin that read "Blake." Unfortunately, she was turned away, because she was late and visiting hours were over. These tears dry on their own. [The Sun]
- Rikki Rockett of Poison was arrested on a rape warrant as he stepped off of a flight from New Zealand at LAX on Monday. Can Bret Michaels stop frenching blow-up dolls long enough to help an old friend out? [TMZ]
- Grey's Anatomy hottie Justin Chambers speaks out about his sleep disorder: "It's a biological sleep disorder. Your mind keeps racing, and your body is tired. It wants to go to sleep, but it can't." Hmm, maybe that's why he has 5 kids? [People]
- "I'm not sure I can sing 'Holiday' or 'Like A Virgin' ever again. I just can't. Unless somebody paid me like $30 million or something. [Like if] some Russian guy wants me to come to the wedding he's going to have to a 17-year-old." —Madonna. [People]
- Madonna was also heard bitching about traffic congestion charges in London, LOL. [Mirror]
- Oh, and Madonna is on the cover of the new "green" issue of Vanity Fair, looking like she will fucking eat you for breakfast. [The.Life Files]
- Have Kate Moss and Jamie Hince set a date? A source says they'll get married in September. [The Sun]
- Heath Ledger's will has been released. The 2003 document leaves 50% of his assets to his sisters and the rest to his parents. [TMZ]
- Britney Spears is on a health kick and has been having colon cleaning sessions at a Beverly Hills clinic, TMI!!! [Mirror]
- Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale: Hoping Gwen's unborn will be a girl! Harajuku girl, hollaback girl, just a girl, etc. [Mirror]
- Jennifer Aniston and Orlando Bloom: Seen having dinner, oooh. [Page Six]
- Dancing With The Stars Karina Smirnoff: Dating Mario Lopez? Or R&B singer Mario? Or both? [Page Six]
- Hillary and Bill Clinton are in the new Martin Scorsese Rolling Stones movie, rocking out. [Rush & Molloy]
- The Hills resident dude Brody Jenner was kicked out of a Los Angeles club for grabbing a bottle of vodka from behind the bar when he wasn't served fast enough and then squirting lemon in the bartender's eyes. Asshole. [Rush & Molloy]
- Rapper T.I. pleaded guilty to federal weapons possessions charges and will spend one year in prison, sigh. Still like his cheekbones. [TMZ]
- Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt were both in Vegas this week, but stayed in different hotels. You know, it used to feel like, she's an idiot for being with that douche; now it's like, naw, they deserve each other. [People]
- Will Ivana Trump and her 24-years-younger fiancé, Rossano Rubicondi, stop fighting long enough to get married on April 12? He nearly got arrested during a domestic disturbance last week. But OK! magazine has the rights to the wedding pix, so they'd better say I do even if they don't. [Page Six]
- Pete Doherty is into Scientology now? For the love of Xenu. [The Sun]
- Paris Hilton was a judge in the Miss Turkey pageant in Istanbul, and honestly, it hurts to think of her as representing us internationally. But anyway here's video of her bellydancing, sigh. [People]
- Counting Crows singer Adam Duritz has been battling severe depression and mental illness. Not to make light of the situation but a haircut might help. [People]
- Celine Dion has postponed a series of Australian concerts due to a throat infection — but her heart will go on! [Reuters]
- Tom Cruise joining the cast of the upcoming J.J. Abrams Star trek movie? No. [MSNBC]
- But! Tom Cruise is trying to get back in the game: He dined with onetime nemesis Sumner Redstone of Viacom yesterday. [WSJ]
- Is Jessica Simpson secretly married to Tony Romo? Or is her mom just effing with us? [News.com.au]
- Actress Morgan Fairchild is campaigning to raise awareness about the warning signs of a stroke. [UPI]
- There's some weird (Czech?) rumor that Kylie Minogue will announce her engagement to Olivier Martinez at a concert on May 12. [PopDirt]
- Tina Fey! Spilling about what's next on 30 Rock! "Both of Liz's former boyfriends, Dennis the Beeper King [Dean Winters] and Floyd [Jason Sudeikis] will be back briefly. And Liz does have a little bit of a pregnancy scare. She probably hooks up once every seven years, yet when it rains, it pours. We have a storyline coming up where Jack tries to enlist Tracy to be the new black face of the Republican Party." All this and more! [LA Times]
Comments
Amy Winehouse looks f-ed up in EVERY PICTURE...but it's probably because she is.
Okay, Madonna, what will you sing?! Crap from "Ray of Light" or the "Evita" soundtrack?! The 80's stuff is the only music of yours that I like. Stop being so serious.
I stand firm behind this statement: Brody Jenner is a douchenozzle. Woof.
Oh, that wacky Madonna. I want to hit her in the head for that $30M remark. But in the VF pic, her hair looks great. Her hair always looks great. But yeah, she does look like she'll bite my ear off.
Belly dancing and generally twitching your ass? Not the same thing. Paris seemed like a good sport though.
Madonna looks great in that picture, but yes, evil.
Yay for Kate Moss - I have unreasonable love for her and want her to be happy with her new, less dirty, cuter man.
omg omg omg 30 rock.
that's all i have to say.
Hey, Justin Chambers: I have that sleep disorder, too. It's called crippling anxiety.
@melinderr: I know! I am so excited.
Are they out of umbrellas in Baltimore, Adam? You know you should never have done that Shrek soundtrack.
Madonna, stop being an asshole. You play your hits. They're the fucking reason you are who you are.
Jennifer Anniston, you go girl. Get that pretty, young stuff.
I've no sympathy for Adam Duritz even though I've been clinically depressed myself. When he was on top he was an annoying pretentious fuck. And no one that ugly who's boned 2/3 of the female cast of friends has a right to be depressed about anything.
Morgan Fairchild. Because I'm old I remember when she was the absolute shit. Still dig her.
J-Simp and the entire Simp family: Please go the hell away. Thanks. At this point, you aren't famous for doing anything other than the Cowboys QB.
Maybe Madonna already has sung at such a wedding and is making a joke about it before the pictures leak to the Daily Mail.
I hope this "green" issue is a little more exciting than the last one. I recycled that one to Mom within two days of arrival.
Can I be Gwen and Gavin's baby instead? There's a job I wouldn't mind reporting to everyday . . .
Hey, Madonna, traffic congestion charges in London = great. They address the negative externalities (pollution, congestion, noise, accidents) caused by people driving instead of taking the excellent London public transport. And is £8 really that much for you?! Really?
Halp! I can't post!
Wait. Can I now?
I did not need to read "poops, she did it again."
Wow. Boring gossip roundup today. @Macloserboy: I sat next to him at a concert once, at the height of his fame. Words cannot do justice to the level his douchiness.
I feel like there's a joke to be made with 80's bands Warrant and Poison and Ricki ROcket and every rose has its thorn or whatever but it's too early and I haven't had my coffee.
Holy shit! 30 ROCK is gonna be soooooooo awesome!!
Hey Adam Duritz, some things you should keep to yourself. Like a double album full of whiny shit-ass songs about your depression and recovery.
Yes! Dennis the Beeper King is coming back! Love. Him.
Heath is an example of why it is important to update your will with every life change. You never know when your time is up, and you don't want to put you family through more crap.
Kylie and Olivier are back together?
@tscheese: Neither can I! OR can I???
Ok I can! Phew, I was getting all anxious and shit...
And Madonna, until you have been on Northern line tube in the height of summer in peak hour just STFU about things you know nothing about. Take your money and eff off.
@cuteasabutton: I actually emailed the Jez staff about it, and I got a really nice email right away saying that the site had had some problems, but I guess now it's back.
Jez delivers!
I hope Scientology can get Petey off the smack. Only Scientologists can help people in distress, after all.
@tscheese: Aww such speedy and efficient service! And on a Friday too! Yay for Jezebel!
Oh, Madonna. The only person in the world who can make Linda Evangelista look modest.
p.s., I still heart you...I'll pay you $25 to sing "Holiday" at my anniversary this June. Please?
@tscheese: I had to clear my cookies and my temporary internet files, and then log in again. Only then was I able to post. I was starting to get paranoid that I was banned.
@DoNotStalk: The Church of Scientology is the authority on the human mind.
Seriously! L. Ron Hubbard read at least three books about Freudian psychology.
Nothing like telling the world you're hoping for a girl, G&G. That way, when your kid is born with a penis, he'll grow up and know what a tremendous disappointment he was.
YES!! It worked! Praise jeebus!
@DoNotStalk: I did that a couple of times and it worked once, but then the whole clearing cache/restarting the browser/logging-back-in song and dance stopped working for me, and I had a sadface.
But then the Jez-editrices came through for me. Love!
Amy Winehouse looks like she's on an episode of "Studs" with that tag stuck to her shirt.
@Macloserboy: "When he was on top he was an annoying pretentious fuck. And no one that ugly who's boned 2/3 of the female cast of friends has a right to be depressed about anything."
It's early in the day for a Best Comment nominee, but you just made me snort OJ all over my keyboard. It burns, dammit!
@ineffable.me: VH1 can do a Poison spin-off maybe? Cellblock of Love?
@DoNotStalk: I'm sure they will teach him his 'hard earned' money should NOT go up his nose...but into their pockets.
So, wait - 17 year old girls still KNOW Madonna's 80's music?
@MissMalicious: Of course, it is retro!
And again I feel old...
@hortense: More like "Salad Toss of Love." "Tea-Bag, will you stay in this maximum security facility and rock my world?"
I don't know, if Tracy Jordan is the black face of the Republican party, that might make it too easy for the Black Crusaders to target him. Also, can we see a throwdown between Dennis and Floyd like that time Aidan and Big mud-wrestled on SATC? Though Floyd would fold like a paper fan in an instant, and I like him better.
@hortense: I think they should have a show with ALL the dreamy dudes from the 80' and a bunch of 80's video chicks. I want to sing my favorite hits while I see my somewhat favorite dudes get it on with the video girls i totally ignored.
I want a came by david lee roth doing the choreography for hot for teacher.
yes. thats exactly what i want.
@tellmeagain: oh Floyd. I love him so so so much.
Adam, I've also been up for 28 hours and don't feel like sleep's coming soon. Maybe that'd help?