Jezebel
Henry Holland, left, is a young English designer. He is also the best friend of model Agyness Deyn, whom he calls his muse. This should be all the information you need to start forming really dark, twisted and judgmental thoughts about the people who attended the party Holland hosted for himself in London last night. The Good? Ha! The Bad? They wish! The Ugly? Oh yessssss. It's all there, after the jump.
The Ugly!
Go back to the Magic Kingdom, Bethan Lauren Wood.
Bishi couldn't decide whether to wear pink tights or black tights, so she wore one pair on her legs and one pair on her arms.
Thanks a lot, David Saunders, for triggering my vertigo. Asshole.
Not gonna lie: Based on looks alone, I think that Gary Card is the kind of person I would like to have a flute of champagne with.
I don't know you, Jimmy de Paris, but I think I should.
Why such a sour puss, Louise Gray? Oh wait, it's probably because your outfit is making the other guests cry.
Pixie Geldof needs to pee really badly.
Who is this Toululu Deyami lady? Because she could so outwalk any of the contestants on America's Next Top Model this season.
[Images via Getty.]
Comments
Bethan Lauren Wood: Is clown makeup high-fashion? Please tell me we're not going to have to wear this at some point in the near future.
And Jimmy de Paris: Hello, indeed. Wouldn't throw that outta bed.
when i scroll down quickly the "house of holland" background has this weird hypnotizing effect. on the plus side, it distracts from the outfits.
Why is Jimmy de Paris ugly - is it the brown belt, grey jacket? I think he should be upgraded to bad
Louise Gray looks AWESOME!!! i love her!
Pixie Geldolf is such a perfect name for so many occasions. Was Agyness not there? This was her moment to go no holds barred on her clothes! Er, wait a second...
My head just exploded, I don't even know how I'm typing this now. Do we have a category past ugly? Maybe just this once?
They all have AMAZING names, no? Pixie Toululu Gray Card deParis?
OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE
Ridiculous pose aside, Pixie Geldof looks cute and genuinely cheerful, which is something you rarely see in party photos.
Also, her old man wrote "Do They Know It's Christmas?" which is my favorite Christmas song ever.
I think I am having one of those Japanese cartoon seizures.
That's not Louise Gray. That's Amy Poehler on her way to perform on "Deep House Dish".
No red sausage leg pantyhose, ladies! No, no, no, no, no!!!
Hasn't this guy and his "Frankie says RELAX" knockoff tshirts faded into obscurity
Oh. My. Freakin. God. My eyes won't stop bleeding.
These pictures are making my eyes hurt.
Aw, the last gal's outfit is totally shades of a McDowell's uniform ala Coming to America.
Being an "Artist" is not easy...imagine the time it took to think up these "Visual Concepts"??
I interned with Henry back at a now-defunct teen magazine, and he's basically everything that you think he is.
This is just a regular night out in Shoreditch in London for these people. Ive seen people running around in the city in these outfits in broad daylight for chrissakes. So fug and totally hipster doofus pretentious. Yuk.
@garrison-tequillor: oh shit--you're totaaly dead-on, there!
@garrison-tequillor: the last outfit was totally inspired by this
for more house of holland fun
[geometricsleep.blogspot.com]
how embarrassing to show up at henry holland's party and discover you're wearing the same jacket. also embarrassing: lucite heels with periwinkle laces
This whole thing looks like a Jean Paul Gaultier show on acid. So just a Jean Paul Gaultier show, then.
My eyes! My eyes!
Dude...I like Bishi b\c she is voluptuous and ambiguously ethnic. I give total bad-fashion passes to voluptuous ladies who make it into the "cool" (hahaha) kids club.
something about the "house of holland" backdrop with the label printed 10000 times makes the photos more dizzying than i think they really are! gotta love some wackiness here... though i have to say, agyness deyn (mentioned as holland's bff and muse)? i just don't get it. maybe i'm missing something.
This is actually like great therapy for me. Some of my outfits might not be perfection, but at least I know that I will never look this bad.
Thanks, Jezebel!
Whoever said "pretentious" is right. Wearing psychotically hideous mismatched clothing doesn't make you special.
@cuteasabutton: Shoreditch twats the Nu Wave...
On one level I love 'em. They buy all the hideous gaudy vintage tat I flog on Ebay...and pay my bills...but on a personal level I feel shame for encouraging it. This is putting me off my lunch...
um i dont like to disparage entire countries
but um a lot of british girls look wonky
like something is just off with their eyes mouths i dont know yes pixie im talking to you
When will it end? Please. Help. Now.
@ExtensionOfBob: i liked bishi as well the shoes not so much
@EleanorRigby: if you scroll up and down fast, it's really trippy.
@ExtensionOfBob: Yeah, I give Bishi much respect for the way she works her ambiguously ethnic voluptuousness. Mega fierce points!
Now about that outfit, however...
@ineffable.me: good call!
i'm gonna focus on jimmy.
This looks like a fun party to me. Mind you, not every night, what with the taking themselves so seriously and all.
@gherkinfiend: Haha! You're contributing to the problem! I swear, I was in Shoreditch once and saw this girl who basically looked like she'd fallen in a thrift shop £1 bin and was wearing whatever had stuck to her. I am also in the habit of calling it "Whoreditch"!
@glamzonhobbitfeet: haha. for a second i thought nobody could see the picture.
that whole collection was a lovefest to 90s movies.
while henry holland is by no means high fashion, he and his friends still somewhat pushing boundaries, which is what we need if you want it to trickle down to your very safe party dresses. It's not my style, but i'm not going to knock it. Can we talk about something else please.
Bethan Lauren Wood's wardrobe choice is making baby jesus cry.
@cuteasabutton:
Yeah, they don't look that extreme. Just you know, popping down to the shop for a pint of milk.
Wow...Pixie Geldof is the best of the bunch. I have said it aloud and to quote "The Office"- "I shall collapse into myself like a dying star."
@cuteasabutton: My finest moment ever was seeing a girl in 93 Feet East wearing the some gold and rhinestone orthapaedic meets street walker shoes ..which I had recently managed to flog to her for £30 on Ebay.
I just couldn't stop myself going up and saying 'I love your shoes'...
this is why I stay away from Shoreditch these days. I can't help myself...I like to dress them up like Pretentious Barbie and then mock them from the safety of the bar...
jimmy de paris: Yowza!
You can't just rip off outfits that you saw people wearing in an documetary about The Danceteria and pretend your being edgy. They actually made up their own style, YOU DIDN'T arrrrgh.....
@brookidy: Seriously, my eyes started twitching uncontrollably when I scrolled down. Also, was pixie's sister Peaches there? Because I love her.
Is it just me or does that Henry Holland look pretty simian with those arms? What he's wearing is an insult to simians.
And I like that Bishi, voluptuous pity about what she dragged herself into.
They all look like they are trying SO HARD!
Huh. Turns out I recognize Gary Card from the "London Calling" issue of Nylon (yes, I know I'm admitting I read Nylon). He had a purple velvet suit and was kind of adorable. I'd have champagne with him.
My best gay briefly had a bit of a thing with Henry Holland back before he was Henry Holland. Now I can't open a magazine without him telling me this. Or go on the internet, it seems.