Jezebel
We spend a lot of time here discussing the state of Womanity, but what about the disenfranchised men we're furiously displacing with our quest for equality? According to a survey commissioned by a British men's TV network called DMAX (home to such fare as Mega Mutt and Star Munchies), the majority of British men say they must live according to "women's rules," the Telegraph reports. In addition, 33% say they feel "handcuffed" by political correctness and are unable to speak their minds, and an equal number of men are afraid of bossy women. The Telegraph says that British men are thirsting for a return to "traditional" manliness, which they say American scholars have termed a "menaissance."
The dubiousness of this "study" is obvious from the get-go, since it was performed by the British equivalent of Spike TV and only polled 2,000 people, but I'd also argue that women don't want what the survey called "waxed and coiffed metrosexuals," despite the fact that men think they do. My concept of being a "real man" is fulfilling responsibilities (though I suppose that goes across gender — that's my concept of being a real woman, too), and just because those responsibilities are shifting towards domesticity doesn't have any bearing on their "manhood."
The same survey says that "63 percent of women recognize that men are struggling to meet the demands made of them," and to that I say, so fucking what? Women have been struggling to meet the demands of work and home life forever, so it's good that men are bearing some of the load of that difficult balance. Maybe the British men in this survey would feel more manly if they stopped being such pussies and stepped up to the same set of issues women have been dealing with for at least thirty years.
Modern Men Feel Emasculated, Study Claims [Telegraph]
Comments
I'm bossy AND critical. Although I'm trying to work on it. Honestly, I have no idea how my boyfriend puts up with me.
I love Roseanne.
Oh noes! Men are complaining about the same shit we've been dealing with forever. You don't like bossy women? Well, we didn't like being forced into submission.
Kiss my "bossy" ass, men.
Note that demanding men are not desribed as "bossy." They're just assertive and in control!
Bullshit.
BUT who wears the PANTS?
Star Munchies? Really? What kind of show is that? Any way to catch that in the US? I must know!
My husband is British and just this morning he called me bossy. But he was not complaining.
Boo Fucking Hoo. I'll remind my husband that he's been totally emasculated by washing dishes when I'm giving him a blow job tonight. Dudes don't like bossy women? Fine, we don't like assholes.
Yeah, these are wuss-boys. When they say "speak their mind" what they mean is a lot of offense shit they can now get fired or sued over.
The term "menaissance" made me spew my tea.
And handcuffed by political correctness my ass. Yes, we live in an allegedly civilized society. Do try your best not to attack people based on sex, race, religious affiliation, etc. This is sour grapes because they can no longer call their secretaries "baby" or their neighbors "nigger" without getting called out. Boo hoo.
this is sorta off topic, but it reminds me of something my friend said last night, while talking about her boyfriend (whom she loves very much):
*sigh* he just has so many FEELINGS.
and the problem is...?
I don't like bossy men. Neither do I like whiners who think other people should make life easy for them all the time.
Just because your mama said you were the most handsome, brilliant, and talented boy in the world doesn't mean everyone else has to think so.
Tough nuts. Welcome to real life, pansies. People demand responsibility from you, so take it.
Anyway, I don't buy these whiners. Most of them are out trolling for a second mommy and they know it.
I expect these bossy women also have the nerve to earn more than 25k (or whatever that random figure was from that earlier poll of dozy British men), too. Chuh!
When hubby cleans the counter top without leaving crumbs and sticky spots, stops shrinking my laundry whilst trying to be "helpful", and remembers to pick up his own damn dry cleaning, THEN I will stop being bossy.
He loves me anyway and I adore him, so I guess it works for us.
@SarahMC: totally. I'm sure when I assert myself at work, I'm viewed as 'bossy' and/or 'bitchy' by my team, comprised of all men and me.
@Archetype: I'm critical too...I think my husband tolerates it b/c I don't criticize him, just others. :)
I'm not bossy, I'm just a taskmaster. I delegate well.
That picture made me throw up in my mouth a little bit. Just sayin...
Most guys I know love bossy women... Although the "bossy" sometimes translates to "willing to be the mom in the relationship" - i.e., the chick remembers to pay all the bills, schedule dentist appointments, update the social calendar and generally do all the maintenance stuff. While the guy happily goes along with not having to take responsibility.
@Pinkosaurus: "Star Munchies" sound like the snack cakes from Little Debbie.
I think we all know what a real man is, he's relaxed with pep, spends quality times with his kids when he can, he's not a fake wanna be, tryin' to be a pimp. He's a good man. A mighty good man.
@kitschenette: Very right. Suck it up men, we really didn't dig the barefoot and pregnant that you pushed on us. Be happy we aren't promoting fashion corsets for you!
@SarahMC: That describes my current office. Pointing out unethical business moves means I'm 'bitching'. Men talking loudly on the phone and insulting their silly wives, strong and confident. Ugh.
Right, "women's rules." We really enjoy getting paid about 2/3 of what men do. That is our rule.
Also, "menaissance" sounds like a gay porn.
lol, have any of you heard that Kelis song bossy? Now it's stuck in my head.
in the words of my mother, "I like a man with a strong pimp hand, but it can't be stronger than mine"
Time to call the waaaaaaaahmbulance.
"My concept of being a 'real man' is fulfilling responsibilities (though I suppose that goes across gender -- that's my concept of being a real woman, too), and just because those responsibilities are shifting towards domesticity doesn't have any bearing on their 'manhood.'" Amen, Jessica.
Yawn. This is not news. I constantly have men tell me they're intimidated by my strong personality. Stand up to me, boys. Give me a challenge.
@SarahMC: for the record, my boss regularly calls me *dear.* i'm pretty sure it's because he forgets my name (which is sad, since there are less than 15 people in the office and only 4 women) but ugh. i HATE it. and i'm quitting in about 4 months...and i'm already looking forward to the day i put my 2 weeks notice in, at which point i can say "for the love of GOD don't call me 'dear'."
Where is this world that's run by women's rules? I would like to live in it. I imagine it to be very tranquil and civilized.
If you can't deal with a so-called "bossy" woman then you're probably not man enough to be in control anyway.
these whiny men need to shut their damn pie holes, get back in the kitchen, and make me a sandwich.
"Handcuffed by political correctness". Oh, so you can't indiscriminately tell women driver jokes on TV or beat up your old lady, so now your cock is dead to the world. Here'e the world's smallest violin playing "Fuck Off and Die, Meathead" for you. Jesus.
@hatepaperdoll: CotD
Oh whatever. I'm totally bossy and stubborn (my last boyfriend liked to use the term "difficult") and I flip a lot of shit. And I love that about myself. I don't want to waste my time with anyone who's too much of a pansy to put up with it and/or flip shit right back at me. It keeps things interesting and fun.
Reminds me of a cartoon I saw many moons ago where two strong, muscular women were walking through a gym. A male doing weight-lifting looked over and said something like "Ugh, what a turn-off. I'd never go out with someone who could beat me up." To which one of the women replied "What makes you think I'd want to?"
@KLondike5: Also doesn't mean that I become your mother/office wife when that individual is not available.
A lot of men confuse their immaturity for feeling "emasculated."
Men, if you feel emasulated, well, man up. Stop lying, cheating, etc. Understand that women fight for what we believe in just like you do, we're not going to stop just because your panties are in a bunch. Also, disagreeing with you does not make your opinion any less valid. It just means we disagree. Now let's have a civil discussion and see if we can find some common ground, like adults.
If "Menaissance" means men are going to stop waxing their chests, I say bring it on!
Last year there was a crazed man at my university, standing on the grass screaming whilst holding a sign that listed all of the people he thought were going to Hell. Near the bottom of the list were "Girly-Men" and "Mouthy Women." It was the creepiest thing.
@stacyinbean: Was it the mullet?
Some men: Wah wah wah. I don't like big mean wimminz tellin' me what to do! It totally cramps my style, bra!
Women everywhere: Eat a bag of dicks. I don't like dudes beating/raping/killing me, but that doesn't seem to stop it, does it?
Holy shit, I sooo didn't recognize Roseanne in that photo!!
And damned straight I am bossy and he lives by my rules...and he loves it! k, he says he does and he's still around after 15 years so I take that as an endorsement. And seriously, gals, if we didn't frikkin make the rules it would all go to hell in a handcart straight out the gate and we all know it.
@glamzonhobbitfeet: Totally! I'm off to youtube just so I can hear that zany beat.
@KathrynwithaY: YUM. starcrunch. off to CVS to purchase.
@cinemaddict: I've always said it's a good thing the path to hell isn't decided by a vote. Because I'd be screwed.
Roseanne was one of the best shows ever in the history of the world until the later seasons. That's all I gotta say right now.
"and to that I say, so fucking what"
I love you for that Jessica
honestly, stop whining and start maning up and taking some freaking responsibility for something besides ejaculation, kthanksbai
@Sev:
beat me to it!
Oh noes, the wimmins are getting out of control again! Who gave them shoes? Who let them out of the kitchen? Why aren't they knocked up?
Let's be real: we wouldn't date guys who identify with that survey.
@KLondike5: Word. That is Bigbro to a tee.
@KLondike5: Now let's not go blaming their mommas. Because then its going to come back to blaming women for not raising men who can take care of themselves. These guys who bitch about this stuff are just jerks.
Ha ha - I don't like pussy-ass men, so I HOPE that they don't like me!
I like being bossy, bitchy, difficult, stubborn, controlling and anal. It's a really good asshole weenie filter.
Also, I'm very good at getting things done.