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    "James And I Have Been Having Unprotected Sex For The Last 2 Months"

    jacksonpollock.jpgIt is never a good sign when the context of a Crap Email submission includes the words "If you've ever been to Union Pool, you've probably met him." But alas, Kelly fell in love with James anyway, described "an artist after the Jackson Pollock model" who wears double denim and sleeps around and asks his parents for money and failed out of grad school and... oh Kelly, five years you shared an apartment with this asshole? Kelly finally broke it off with James after receiving this missive on MySpace from another woman, an "Experimental Architecture" student she had heard about because James would often go out of his way to demean her (and her sexual preferences!) in conversation. (Never a good sign!) The prose is unremarkable, but the questions posed in the message are interesting: is it ever a good thing to tell the girlfriend of the dude you are fucking that you fucked him? And also: how shitty does a straight dude have to get a girl seriously worried about AIDS?

    Subject: Thought that you should know...

    Body:
    Hi Kelly,

    This info. is yours to do what you want with but I thought that you
    should know so that you can protect yourself on whatever levels you
    deem necessary:

    JAMES AND I HAVE BEEN HAVING UNPROTECTED SEX FOR THE LAST 2 MONTHS. I will never go near him again as he is a lying waste of my time. I lived with him while you were in [Summer Theater Place] that summer. IN YOUR BED. This summer, when I came back from Europe he made moves for us to be together. While we were not monogomous (nothing serious)- he lied to me about being with you. He has repeadetley said now and back then that he was never going to marry you - and knew this after 1 1/2 years of being with you. He told me all the details of your sex life
    together - what your [sic] like, what you like. That night you saw me at the
    gallery he called me many times to come hang out with him and his
    buddies in Brooklyn after it was over - while you were at home. There
    is much, much more but I am writing this to make you aware. I would seriously go and get yourself checked for AIDS/HIV. I have not
    had a test in over two years and so I cannot say that I am safe - make
    sure you are and take care of yourself.


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