Jezebel
It's almost spring, so it's probably fitting that Cosmopolitan has decided to put Heroes actress Hayden Panettiere on the cover of its April issue (right next to the words "SEX GENIUS" in 64-point type!). Not only is Panettiere a budding star — after she gets her first big, silver-screen role her handlers will no doubt go after the cover of the glossier, more respected Glamour — and a budding adult (she's just 18), but, according to graphologist Sheila Kurtz, she's got "buds of an imagination, but no apparent follow through." (Ouch?) After the jump, Kurtz weighs in on the actress' handwriting, as seen on the "Cosmo Quiz" accompanying Hayden's newly-released cover story.
The overall slant of this writing is moderately to the left, an indication of a person who is somewhat introverted. Unless the writer knows you fairly well, you won't get close. It appears that there is little stress shown in the writing, and it's likely that even if somebody gets too close too fast, the writer will fend off and not erupt.Letters are rounded, the sign of a methodical thinker who likes to take time and does not like to be rushed. No fast deadlines for this writer or she will tend to get scattered in her pursuits.
Writer's goals are alternately high enough to stretch for and low enough to pick off the ground. There are signs of initiative (takes action without prompting by others).
Thinking can be accelerated somewhat by the writer's intuition (indicated by spaces between letters). This writer has learned to skip over many of the logical building blocks of thought and reach, almost mysteriously, a conclusion that turns out to work. The writer has come to trust this gut thinking. Nonetheless, if this writer starts thinking too fast, a lot of confusion results (intertwined lines) that slows everything down again. Better for this writer to be the turtle than pretend to be the hare.
There are buds of an imagination, but no apparent follow through.
Good attention to small details. The writer's usual approach to things is frank and very direct.
The writer probably works well (or could) with her hands, perhaps in the mechanical realms such as carpentry, pottery, glass blowing..
Lines and letters are pressed close together and the e formations are constricted, all indications of a mind with many preconceptions that clog up the arteries to new ideas.
There are also indications of a person who usually tells the truth (as most of us may see it) and is steadfast and loyal to people and institutions she believes in.
Earlier: Heroes' Hayden Panettiere Is An American Everywoman
Cosmo Girl Rihanna: "Solitary & Self-Involved"
Decoding Cosmo Cover Girl Katie Heigl: "She Refuses To Waste Time With Convoluted Crap"
Cosmo Girl Hilary Duff: Intuitive, Practical And Younger Than She Looks
Cosmo Girl Beyonce Knowles: Detail-Oriented, Thoughtful, Possibly Power-Hungry
'Cosmo' Cover Girl Ali Larter: Self-Involved, Stubborn, Easily Distracted
Related: Sheila Kurtz [Graphology Consulting]
Comments
"The writer probably works well (or could) with her hands, perhaps in the mechanical realms such as carpentry, pottery, glass blowing.."
Well I'm sure Milo is happy to hear that.
I wish I was paid to make crap like this up.
Is it a slow day for you guys or something?
she has little girl handwriting!
It freaks me out that we're the same age.
At least my boyfriend is twenty, not thirty. Advantage, moi.
Does the magazine print this, or is this a Jezebel thing?
Because, wow, that was a huge waste of time.
@misssgolightly: I don't know, I kinda like the older guys.
@Bathsheba: From your comment, I can tell that you enjoy thunderstorms, but don't like it when your socks get wet.
You crave attention and are sleep-deprived.
You hate it when people talk about how awesome Target is and think international travel is overrated.
Also, you had a turkey bagel sandwich for lunch.
These always remind me of the verbal smack down my Psych professor gave that one girl when she asked when we would learn handwriting analysis.
That said, it took me forever to read Hayden's nickname.
The body/head ratio of that cover photo is making me dizzy.
I love this column--I'm obsessed with handwriting.
How can we forget Hayden's amazing role in Ice Princess?
all this handwriting is missing are hearts dotting the i's. am i wrong here?
@LoveNoelG: thanks for sharing!
@Bathsheba: I don't know, I feel like it would be hard to relate to someone 11-12 years older than me. When you're thirty and the guy is forty, it may be better.
But when you're talking about an eighteen year old and a thirty year old, they're at two different points in life. But whatever works for you, I guess.
No way would I trade lives with A. Jolie. Too much work.
I have a crush on Angie also, but for more sexual reasons. Though saving the world and all it cool too.
@ineffable.me: Exactly, I'm pretty sure I wrote like that in fifth grade.
Also, shouldn't it be freakishly easy to do one of these handwriting things on a celebrity? It's not like they never do interviews or happen to be answering personal questions about themselves in the sample she was given.
I'm also surprisingly miffed she did not mention Grant Aleksander as one of her favorite costars, as he would have been my inappropriately older boyfriend.
@misssgolightly: True that. I'm 21 and I guess I have grown up a lot since I was 18. But I have a feeling Hayden has probably had to grow up too, being a big Hollywood star and all.
Her nickname is Hayd, right? I thought it said Flagel at first. I would have mentioned that if I did the handwriting analysis.
@rabbitboy: I prefered Bring It On Again. It really underscored her abilities as an actress when she played a crime-fighting unkillable cheerleader of jusice in Heroes.
@SoleilMoonPie: hahaha, if she keeps dating Milo it just might be! [www.medicinenet.com]
@SoleilMoonPie: I thought it said "Floyd."
@hamburgerhotdog: Yikes!! Here I was all innocently thinking of flat bagels!
@Miss Pelled: Floyd does suit her.
@Miss Pelled: Or "Flayd", as in the synonym for "whip'd".
@sarahrose: I'm with you... I used to think that people with that kind of handwriting are dumb. (But I soon learned that I'm not the genius I thought I was).
Is it just me, or are all the 'up-and-comers' lately pretty-but-generic blond and blue-eyed white ladies? Isn't Hollywood already overrun with generic blonds? Kate Hudson, Kate Bosworth, Katherine Heigl, just to name a few, now this chick? Where are all the ladies of color? Hell, just throw me a brunette and I'll shut up; for awhile, anyway.
If she weren't an actress, she would be "undercover CIA!" Bwa ha ha ha. Not an undercover agent, mind you, the whole durn agency! OMFG, that is some hilariousness. Wow, she smart. She read card good.
@ineffable.me: That's because she's a kid! Maybe it's just me, but seems like there's very little an 18 year old girl knows that a 24 year old can't do better. What's the fascination with these near-children?
Dear Cosmo,
Can you stop making everyone on your covers look like lollipops? Let me save you the trouble of doing the next Hayden cover:
P.S. sorry about the lazy 'shop. I didn't finish her legs because I was too annoyed with the whole "I don't have any shoulders" thing that the magazines are making so hot right now.
such BS
Worst feature ! End end end !
@kimsama: After looking at your photo and seeing the real one at top - I TOTALLY see the lollipop thing. Her head looks like it's been cropped out, enlarged and then put back on the original image.
God, I hate Cosmo.
(and there is no way in hell I would take those quizzes seriously... if they ever asked me to fill one out.)
Sorry to offend, but Hayden Panettiere just creeps me out. Kinda like Dakota Fanning.
The media gods tell me she's so hot. Sorry, just cookie-cutter, bland and creepy.
Plus, "Heroes" sucks. It's a "X-Men rip-off.
@Zantor: I thought the point of Heroes was that it was one of those shows that very consciously pays homage to its forerunners? It's one of my favorite shows (well, season one was) and I never thought of it as "original" per se so much as just well-executed knockoff.
Hayden I can take or leave. Milo creeps me out, but she is legally old enough to make her own damn choices so what can anyone do? I will say this about Hayden, though: unlike Alexis Bledel, if he calls her a cunt I'm sure she'd just pack up and leave.
Maybe the Kurtz didn't know the writer, but she sure knows Cosmo readers. Hence the requisite explanation of the word "initiative" (better to be the turtle but tis even better to nip pandemonium in the bud).
@misssgolightly: nothing finer than an eighty-niner! i feel like i should be older than her, for some reason. maybe because i pick my presidents for more than their stance on whale rights. can't hate on her for the milo thing, though. i had a serious crush on him during gilmore girls.
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