Do you ever get up from the toilet and take a look at your poo? Leslie Crawford did, and wrote about it for Salon. See, there's this incredibly successful new book, What's Your Poo Telling You?, which you can pick up at Urban Outfitters, among other places. Because excrement is not just "ejecta," as Crawford calls it. Solid human waste is "a crystal ball of intestinal health." The book's authors, Josh Richman and Anish Sheth, M.D., write: "Like a snowflake, each poo has a wondrous uniqueness." Plus, many poopers experience "poo-phoria." You know the feeling:
"This poo can turn an atheist into a believer and is distinguished by the sense of euphoria and ecstasy that you feel throughout your body when this type of feces departs your system," write the coauthors. "To some, it may feel like a religious experience, to others like an orgasm, and to a lucky handful it may feel like both. This is the type of poo that makes us all look forward to spending time on the toilet."
Meanwhile, other signs that the shit has hit the fan in this country: A new book called The 'Regular' Gourmet Everyday: Sumptuous Recipes for the Gastro-intestinally Challenged; the popularity of the MasterCleanse diet; the success of Activia and other "active" yogurts; and the fact that Oprah, America's Sweetheart, can't stop talking about crap, with segments like "What Shape Should Your Poop Be?"
Maybe Oprah would like the Turd Twister? It's a butt plug, sorta, but more like the Play-Doh Fun Factory. You push your poo through, and it can be shaped like a star, a heart or a skull. It's the perfect gift for any friend who's full of shit.