Mrs. Spitzer is not the appendage he needs to worry about.

Ok so not only are the wives 'failing to satisfy their husbands' and completely to blame for their prick husbands affairs but now they they don't even have their own personalities. Gah

An appendage? Really?
If I was in that situation, I wouldn't show up to the press conference. Period, end of story, fend for yourself Political Husband. I'm ouuuttttt.

@BAngieB (Ya'll? I'm On Notice): Ha! Still can't believe you are on notice. Fair dues for keeping posting.

Matt, I hardly think Silda "based [her identity on her] spouse's identity." For fuck's sake, she was a PARTNER at Skadden, Arps. Possibly the largest and most consistently profitable law firm in the country.

isn't matt in the process of getting divorced? maybe he's just being a douche and projecting?

I'd be more willing to say these women had their own identity if one would take her identity to the mike and speak the fuck up.

@mepo: I think that having a wife for some political men is a way to show the public that "Hey, I'm normal and a well-rounded family man! I'm certainly not out nailing hookers!"
Very sad for the "appendage" involved.

It

Shut up, Matt Lauer. You're on notice. One more asinine interview like this, and you'll be on that list with Ann Curry and Jodi Applegate.

@mepo:
I don't think that's what he meant...

Look, not ALL women but guys their are so women who still willingly get themselves in this situation, were they LIVE for their husband and what their husband stands for and when it all goes to pot-they don't know what to do at all...

I can see his point and before you all scream, my evidence can only be drawn on parents relationship and what my mother keeps on saying ALL the time to me...even after he died and we asked her why she put up with it all...and she pretty much said something like Lauer..

Do I respect it? No. But this happens..

@KathrynwithaY: word. I'd be filing divorce papers, ideally to have served to him AT the press conference. I would NOT be the supportive appendage in any way. I'd be the violently thrashing, stabby appendage.

Isn't that true of well...many (not of course, all) political wives? And isn't that also true of many wives in general?
How many women, married with children, truly have a sense of who they are and what they want just for themselves?
Take it further: are girls ever encouraged to find out who they are and what they want for themselves, even as children? I see little girls as young as two be discouraged from even wearing what they want or eating what they want while little boys get a wider array of choices and more freedom to make those choices from their parents.
Notice that Silda left her high-pressure job for the kids while Spitzer went on to greater professional heights. People with a limited sense of identity make choices that are about sacrficing their own interests way too much. Not saying that Silda is a weak woman or anything. I am saying that she made all these unnecessary sacrifices for someone who didn't really deserve them.

@Lady Skittlehattington's Publicist: Can't we just execute him already?

so, his WIFE is the appendage he used to screw the hooker?

Hope she came.

@warmaiden: And I hope sincerely that if one of them do someday, I hope they tell the public to shut the fuck up and quit telling them how to handle their family crises.

@nadarine: Yay! Me too. We should offer to throw a stabby party for any political wife willing to speak her mind in public. And maybe for refusing to wear a steadfast color like blue.

What is Mrs. Lauer famous for again?

@jeska: Even that - perhaps especially that would be preferable to being the simpering sidekick who remains silent while the man apologizes.

I had a discussion with my husband last night and told him if he's ever having a press conference to admit he used expensive hookers, his ass is standing up there by himself.

@westvillagegirl: No, she left that job after the kids came along and Spitzer's career took off. She works part-time now at a non-profit helping with fundraising.
I am surprised to see so much disagreement with Matt Lauer. What if he had made this statement about Laura Bush? I suspect there would be a lot more agreement with him because Laura is after all a Stepford wife that liberals love to hate.
But politics and superficialities aside, liberal and conservative women alike both face equal crises of identity because there is so much entrenched unacknowledged sexism in child-rearing.
A woman may call herself 'strong' and 'enlightened', it doesn't mean she really is that way. Rhetoric is a poor substitute for the real thing. And the real thing risks criticism and labels such as 'ballbreaker' and 'hairy dyke' which most women fear and loathe.

@nadarine: Haha that would be pretty memorable to serve divorce papers at the public shaming press conference...If I'm going to be an appendage of my spouse or whatever, its going to be a steel fist right right in the balls if they do something that ridiculous.

I think the difference between Mrs. Spitzer and Ms. Matos, is that Silda seems to have her own life and Dina loves being the center of attention.

Most women who have been so "horrifically embarrassed" try to stay out the spotlight, but this woman loves playing the victim card. What Silda does is her own business, but I hope she puts the needs of her children above the needs of anyones career.

Poor Dina, her case was still worse then Silda's ..I mean maybe they should have had her on with Star Jones to discuss how easy it is to marry a gay man.

Maybe she already knew. Cuz if it were me, you couldn't get me in the same room with my husband on the day I found out he was doing prostitutes with no condom. She looks stoic. I would have steam coming out of my ears. Or I'd have at least been bawling. Or both.

Maybe they stopped loving each other years ago but are just going through the movements, and she's taken care of monetarily so she's made peace with it?

@Artful Slinger: Actually I think she should put her own needs over those of the children.
Doing things for the children is vastly overrated and serves mostly to look like a martyr in front of the world while spewing silent toxic resentment at the kids at home. A happy fulfilled mother is better for the children than an unhappy insecure one.

Asking the question "don't some women take on the identity of their husbands?" is not really the same as saying that some women take on the identity of their husbands. And even if it were saying that, what exactly is incorrect about it? Some women certainly do tie their identity to their husband's. I don't think it was that douchy of a question.

The split screen thing is another matter...

@Crazydogggz:

Isn't that true of well...many (not of course, all) political wives? And isn't that also true of many wives in general?
How many women, married with children, truly have a sense of who they are and what they want just for themselves?

I really hope you are joking here.

Can someone take this one for me? I need to calm down before I type out a response.

I would love to see one of these political wives really get up and say something when shit like this happens. There are some things I can forgive, but, high-class prostitution ring? Sorry Governer Douche, I gotta run! And hey, Matt Lauer, what do you base your identity on? Do you even have an identity? Ay, me duele la cabeza....

I am saying that she made all these unnecessary sacrifices for someone who didn't really deserve them.

And as for this, keep in mind that people who choose to stay home (a sacrifice) with children aren't just doing it for their spouses. Sometimes they do it for their children.

JESUS.

@Crazydogggz:
sad but true....

I'm surprised she didn't grab hold of his appendage and wrench it so hard that he pees around corners now.

@TaraIncognita Doesn't Do Press Conferences with Cheesedick ...: Breathe, breathe...

It's a question, though yes, there's a little issue in suggesting that just because a woman is married with kids she has no identity. That's a nasty assumption.

@Crazydogggz: Yup. This is the inevitable result of teaching girls their role in life is to play second-fiddle to a man.

An appendage? Like a shrimp-shaped skin tag?

@Crazydogggz: I meant I hate when women say they are sticking together for the children. Those three girls need to see a strong woman in her mom. I think she also needs to be the opposite of Dina, since that woman can't keep her mouth shut. We get you are pissed - I'd be pissed too. But airing dirty laundry all over the place only hinders you and your children.

@Xavoc: Sanity warning: if Jezebel commenters keep rolling with the penis-abuse posts, you're totally going to get cock-torture perverts in here looking for action.

@AthertonMerriweather: Awesome.

Some jerk I know tried arguing last night that she shouldn't be surprized and all politicians cheat on their wives. Unfortunately, most, probably not all, do. He then argued that they were all using their husbands to launch their own careers.

I think there may be another issue here, that of the "political partnership." I don't know much about spitzer's wife, so this could be waaay off, but in countries where women generally have a harder time coming to power it's often helpful for them to associate strongly with the men in their lives for a foothold. This happens all the time, from Sonia Gandhi to Hillary Clinton. It's a shitty system, but for ambitious women sometimes it's a necessary evil. So what do you expect them to do when their husband's cheat? They can't abandon their political team just because one teammate can't keep it in his pants.

@Macloserboy aka Client #9:

It's a question, though yes, there's a little issue in suggesting that just because a woman is married with kids she has no identity. That's a nasty assumption.

Thank you. I cannot believe other people aren't jumping on this. Maybe my comments aren't coming up? Because otherwise...seriously?

@reader123: Have you read Crappy Hour today?

@Crazydogggz: A-fucking-men.

@Crazydogggz:
And the real thing risks criticism and labels such as 'ballbreaker' and 'hairy dyke' which most women fear and loathe.

We use "fucking dyke" 'round these parts.

@Crazydogggz:

Ok, since you have a lot of people agreeing with you here, I'm going to try to follow Macloserboy's advice and breathe.

Here is the part of your statement I have trouble with, just to be clear:

People with a limited sense of identity make choices that are about sacrficing their own interests way too much. Not saying that Silda is a weak woman or anything. I am saying that she made all these unnecessary sacrifices for someone who didn't really deserve them.

What I want to say, and I hope I say this calmly, is that just because someone is staying home with children does not mean she/he has a limited sense of self. Full disclosure: my husband is working and my baby is napping in the room right next to me here. I worked for 6 years as an elementary school teacher, a job I *loved* and still miss. I went to graduate school for 2 years. I made a fully informed decision about what I was doing when I left work and I resent the implication that a woman who stays home with her children has a "limited sense of self," since I also know several stay-at-home dads who I think you'd be loathe to lob that same charge at.

This decision sacrifices my interests only with respect to my former job. It does not sacrifice my interests with regard to my child or my family, however, and I hope you didn't mean what I think you mean.

@TaraIncognita Doesn't Do Press Conferences with Cheesedick ...:
It's not that we aren' or well I aint, I guess I'm exhausted at sexism-and don't get me wrong I still fight but with this situation, I feel she is a real bad example for 'women with no identity'? Her and Dina play the 'innocent' victim in this twisted political game that they have and I'm sorry but they make ME look bad. They make us seem as if we are pathetic so y'know if that means Matt ens up thinking what he does-it's to people like them..

I will always stick up for women and identity but these two are shady...