Jezebel
In some Orthodox Jewish sects, women must wear sleeves past the elbow and skirts (never trousers) past the knees. Slits are verboten (those are for harlots!): kick pleats need only apply. Married women must always cover their heads; most shave their hair off and wear wigs. You'd think with all this covering up, many would have a healthier body image. You'd think wrong! Jewcy.com points us to a Jewish Daily Forward article about anorexia and bulimia among some Orthodox women. According to the Forward, a possible reason for eating disorders amongst ultra-religious Jews is the practice of arranged marriage. "Very often, young men looking for brides in the Orthodox community call a girl's parents and ask for her dress size." If it's over a size 8, says the Forward, she may be headed for spinster city.
Some men go so far to ask for the dress size of the mother of the prospective bride, says Abraham Twerski, author of a book about eating disorders called The Thin You Within You. (You know, so a future husband can rest assure his wife-to-be will be able to shed the baby weight - and there will be many babies: Orthodox Jews don't always believe in birth control). The arranged marriages may be causing eating disorders for another reason as well: Orthodox women are encouraged to wed at a very young age, and some teens who are seeking to avoid marriage develop anorexia to avoid menstruation. No menses = no babies = no marriage.
As many experts note, eating disorders are often about control, and eating disorder specialist Dr. Ira Sacker told the Forward that Orthodox girls and women often want to control their food intake because in such a regimented and ritualized society, what they eat is the only thing they have any power over.
Anorexia remains a taboo subject in the Orthodox world, and as a result, according to Jewcy, "Married and middle-aged women are also susceptible to anorexia and bulimia, and are likely to pass their eating disorders on to their daughters." This is increasingly true everywhere, says the Independent. Apparently the pressure to "age beautifully" like Madonna or Sharon Stone has sent some older women into a shame spiral of disordered eating.
The Orthodox Union is trying to raise money to produce a documentary about eating disorders within the community, tentatively titled, "Dying To Be Thin." Jewcy points out that most mainstream eating disorder films focus on the media's influence on body image, but in TV-free Orthodox households, those messages don't resonate in the same way. Personally, I doubt many Orthodox Jews will be reading about up-and-coming model, willowy Ali Michael, who wasn't cast in almost any runway shows at Paris fashion week because the 17-year-old had gained a whopping five pounds from last year.
["Tefillin Barbie" Image via Jen Taylor Friedman's Official Website.]
Eating Disorders Plague the Orthodox World [Jewcy]
Film To Break Silence Around Anorexia [Jewish Daily Forward]
Related: Wasn't Skinny
Supposed To Be Out Of Fashion? [Wall Street Journal]
Pressure To Grow Old Beautifully Drives Over-50s To Anorexia [Independent]
Comments
Oy.
ugh religion me tiene hasta......
I need some PR posting!
right. First that flavor, now this one.
Can we please come up with a title for an anorexia documentary/news special/book/tv movie that isn't "Dying to Be Thin"? Kthxbai.
I don't know why you'd think women would have a better body image in Orthodox communities. Orthodox Judaism is deeply and perniciously misogynistic.
Again, I ask, where do I turn in the uterus? No more, please.
but that barbie doll pretty much rocks my face off.
I have nothing of substance to post except, that picture is cracking me up.
Carry on, insightful ones.
@hortense: crappy puns ftl!
For some reason, my first thought is: I would kill for a Toaster Strudel right now.
This shit is all so depressing.
I just want to find a girl whose mind is sexy as fuck. I don't give two shits about her body.
This sort of post is why I log on to Jezebel...
... makes me realize how fortunate I have been in so many ways... and also makes me want to spread the word in an effort to change things.
That's the cutest Torah I've ever seen. I wonder if Rami made it.
Shit.
Remember those Lurlene McDonald books about dying girls?
I don't find this Kosher at all.
Bah. I appreciate Jezebel alerting us to these stories, but I have to admit, "Guess what, another group of women hate their bodies," is starting to make me glaze over. My fault, I know, but why do researchers feel the need to segment the population over and over and over again, only to come up with the same freaking issues?
@brendastarlet: FTW!
I can haz Torah barbi?
Women living in a male run closed society are subjected to shallow body ideals? Shocking!
Just because it is a religious community does not mean it is supportive for all it's people. Look what closed Muslim and Christian societies do to their women.
@omerhi: Holla. lol
...and orthodox men don't go down on their wives either. it is generally believed that it will cause your children to be born blind. ahhh! the joys of modern orthodoxy...
So basically no fatties. I guess Hassdim men aren't that orthodox, are they?
Patriarchy - not just for Southern Baptists.
No menses = no babies = no marriage is the most fucked up thing I've read today. If a girl will starve herself to prevent it, what kind of psycho would still want her to get married?
Can we have a lot of kittens later? Like, a bushell full?
@hortense: I know, right? These girls aren't necessarily dying "to be thin." They're dieting and dying for many reasons, like this post pointed out: to stop menstruation, to stay youthful, and to have a sense of control. I think it's an insult to girls, to anorexics, when all anyone thinks about them is that they want to be thin. They/We (I am partially in recovery) want to be thin, yes, but that's part of something larger. Wanting attention, self-control, an identity, something to set you apart form everyone else. It's not just about being thin.
Uh, hey humanity? Want women to stop doing crazy shit to themselves? Stop hating them, controlling every aspect of their lives, and instructing them to hate themselves.
Seriously. I want to liberate oppressed religious women like PETA wants to liberate all the animals in the zoos. Spring from the cages! Run FREE!
All of the anorexic/bulimic girls I have known (including my sister) have gone to great lengths to cover themselves up, regardless of their religious beliefs. Aren't eating disorders more of a control issue than anything else? Please correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm not sure this has anything to do with being an Orthodox Jew.
God.Is noone safe? Can't anyone be fat and happy anymore? Must we all be unhappy?
@hollywoodenflames: Convenient
@the.bleach: Oh my god, I remember those! I secretly wished I had cancer and then felt like an awful person.
@BiscuitDoughJones: Right? I wish women had all the muscles and hegemony just for ONE DAY.
@clitoryss:
That Barbie is awesome.
Religion is evil and just another way for men to control women.
@NoInheritance: I wanted a blind boyfriend.
@blackbirdfly: total control issue. but i don't think the media has ever painted it that way when they do rarely address it. its alsways like, oh girls just wanna look like gisele...barf
Suck! So lame. But yeah, I have to agree that this is perhaps not a big surprise given how controlling the religion is. I wonder if similarities would be found in Muslims (the ones who follow the burka/similarly strict practices)?
And one dumb question: if they keep their heads covered, why do they shave their hair only to then wear a wig? Does the wig "count" or something?
@KnitSandwich: Yes, a wig counts as head covering.
You have to be skinny so you'll look good when I put this horribly pageboy wig on your and make you dress in long denim skirts, knee high hose, orthopedic shoes and vests.
I am totally reading The Outside World by Tova Mirvis right now! Stop stalking me, Jez!
I am pretty sure the author means Hasidic Jews in the Jewcy article. Orthodox women don't shave unless they are ultra-Orthodox, and no one always has to cover their hair--that's a husband thing. No thick tights, not big on the arranged marriages.
Also, really fail to see how this distinguishes Jewish men from the other 8-and-under douchebag quotient.
@sugarbear11: I was just about to say, I hate religion, all religions. It used to be just the Catholicism I was indoctrinated with, but now I've broadened my horizons.
@sugarbear11: Oh, jeez. Can we not? Religion is not inherently evil or misogynist. Religion has shaped te world in many positive ways. FUNDAMENTALISM is bad, not religion per se.
@The Real JR: honestly, i don't think it's just orthodox men who have issues with brides over a size 8.
@omerhi: oh if i had a dollar for all the times i've heard that.
@entonces: I'm thinking they mean ultra-Orthodox, too. But here's the thing: a Jewish woman is supposed to have the right to a happy (married) sex life, right? So if some guy asks for my dress size, I'd be asking right back about their package.
@hortense: I was going to post that! I appreciate the effort of the movie, but that title is very played out.
@braak: Yeah, my mom once committed a big no-no by attempting to shake the hand of a rabbi with whom she had a business meeting. They can't touch no dirty wimmins!
I'm single and loving it and there is no way in hell I'll ever compromise anything for a man. I'm completely self-sufficient after a long and hard struggle. I'll work until the day I die, but that's just fine and a small price to pay for my freedom. That is the philosophy I taught my daughter and will teach my grandaughters. If a man wants to tag along he'd better hang on tight because I'll just shake him off at my discretion because I'm free baby, and that will never change. And for some strange reason, there's always one or more willing to hang on for the ride. If he decides to drop off, oh well. It may not be Nirvana, but it works for me.