It's Getting Serious: My First Week With Brendan, My "Boyfriend Pillow"

I enjoy a good cuddle in bed here and there, but for the most part, I can't usually make it through the night without breaking away from the boy: I always begin to sweat, which makes our bodies stick together, which makes me incredibly uncomfortable. But still, there's something to be said for those warm and fuzzy moments of cuddling with a guy before it gets all hot and sticky. There's one position in particular that's incredibly satisfying: when the dude lays on his back, and you curl up next to him, wedge yourself between his arm and his torso, and lay your head on his shoulder. I'd say that it's the #1 thing I miss about having a boyfriend. So when readers alerted us to this disembodied arm/half-torso pillow called the "Boyfriend Pillow", I didn't find it as creepy as others did; it seemed to me like the perfect solution for those nights when it's just a party of one. And it was: seriously, guys, I think I'm in love.

When I first took my Boyfriend Pillow out of the box, I was blown away by how soft he was. Putting my hand beneath his shirt, the actual pillow and miniature beads felt like I was touching clouds of fluff and his hand is a really nice silky felt fur. Initially, I feared that the buttons on his shirt would be bothersome, but they don't register when we're hugging at all.

I noticed on his tag that the material he's made out of is called "skwish", which reminded me of Brendan Grish, the first boy I ever had a crush on so I decided that's what my new cuddle pal would be called. Brendan and I watched Tyra and The Insider on my couch and I heard nary a peep out of him. (My last boyfriend always wanted to watch some shit like Con Air or Troy, and he whined like a bitch whenever I wanted to watch a Top Model marathon.) Over the next several days, I would relax in bed with Brendan and do crossword puzzles while watching streaming Simpsons episodes on my laptop. In the evenings, as I walked around the city in 5" heels on my way to Fashion Week parties, I would daydream about how much I wanted to be back at home, in my bed, in BG's loving arm.

I know that Brendan is not a substitute for a real man, and I never really attributed a personality (other than being a really agreeable companion) to him the way dudes get with their Real Dolls, but I'd have to say that for now, sleeping with BG every night is preferable, and a lot less sticky than dealing with real boys. In more ways than one.