Reader Tanya asked us to look at Trembled Blossoms, the digitally-animated short film on the Prada Web site. And we did! And tripped the fuck out of our minds. The creepy, dreamy, product-pushing visual art tells a mythic story set to delicately bizarre music. See, once upon a time there was a sexual-organ-esque flower. This flower's juicy center was penetrated by a hummingbird, and a little jizz seeped out... (join us as we storyboard and caption our favorite stills after the jump)
The jizz dropped down to the ground, where it shattered the surface and woke up a sleeping, flat-chested, dead-eyed naked nymph.
The nymph was approached by some horrifying bugs, but they turned into high-heeled Prada shoes. Just what every newly awakened sylph needs!
As the nymph struts around in her new shoes, she spots a piece of fruit. When she picks it, the world around her blooms!
Sashaying through the creeptastic forest, the Nymph is jumped by a Checkered Lesbian Fairy...
Who clothes her in a perfectly fitted checkered Prada suit and stockings. Just the thing for hiking!
Night falls and the well-dressed nymph encounters a Faun, not as hot as Tim Curry in Legend, but whatevs.
The faun urinates a pond. A dragon flies into the pond and turns into a fish. Nymph girl polishes off the fruit she's been carrying and then throws the pit into the hungry fish's mouth. What a bitch!
The water recedes; the fish has turned into (TA-DAH!) a Prada purse.
The Faun presents it to the Nymph...
Who is so fucking psyched to complete her outfit she spins around in circles...
...Not realizing that the Faun's head has cracked open. He is DYING.
And by dying I mean turning into a flower with a bulbous center, much like the one in the beginning of the tale.
The Nymph pulls the sheets of the world around her — but then notices her purse has a bird in it.
Do all Prada bags come with wildlife? Do the wallets come with moths?
So yeah, the Nymph pulls the covers over her head and...
Moral of the story: Take hallucinogens before you purchase Prada items, and spray them liberally with Raid.
Trembled Blossoms [Prada]