The rampant jackassery of the UK tabloid the Daily Mail's "Femail" section is generally so ludicrous that it can't be taken seriously. Even so, there was an article today called "I'm A FEMALE Male Chauvinist - And Proud Of It" that's so hilariously sexist that we felt the need to call it out, along with the other, equally absurd/offensive stories in the section (by the way, this is the same paper that relished in pointing out Kim Cattrall's cellulite yesterday. For those of you who enjoy retribution, the Gallery of the Absurd subjects DM owner Paul Dacre to his own brand of physical scrutiny). Anyway, back to the Female Male Chauvinist, Angela Epstein, who thinks women are not equipped to handle situations where "power is absolute."
"Do I think female doctors are less able? No, but I know who I'd rather have looking after me," Epstein says. "It's not that I take issue with female success," she continues, but "when power is absolute - say, keeping 200 passengers suspended in mid-air at 500 miles an hour or carrying out life-changing surgery - I want a man to be in charge."
And the fun doesn't stop there! Angela says all women have what she terms the "princess gene":
My chauvinistic feelings may be sourced in the fact that every girl inherits the princess gene which dictates her desire for a strong male role model to cosset and comfort her. I see it in my three-year-old daughter who runs to her older brothers or her daddy when a dog barks at her in the park. She trusts them more than me to protect her.
Wait, so is the Princess Gene next to Barbie Gene, or is it across from the Baby Making Gene? I'm so confused by science! (Probably because I'm a woman and shouldn't be trusted with it.)
Moving on, there's also an article in the paper's Femail section about the trials and tribulations of menopause, another one about a a scandalous aristocrat who used to be a dude? Or a hermaphrodite? It's unclear, though she honestly sounds like a lot of fun, and finally, there's an article pondering why women succumb to "slenderlust" that urges women to not be too hard on themselves (an idea we can get behind).
The occasional gem aside, I think we want to mark this (fe)mail return to sender.
I'm A FEMALE Male Chauvinist [Daily Mail]
Requiem For A Lost Youth: Hitting The Menopause [Daily Mail]
A Very Unlady-like Lady: Why High Society Is Terrified Of Lady Colin Campbell [Daily Mail]
Why Are Women So Helplessly Consumed By Slenderlust? [Daily Mail]