Um... Were you my tourguide at Georgetown? I guess not, cause she was walking backwards when she bit it. But wow -- it was hilarious.

I'm too poor/lazy to have ever suffered at the hands of fashion.

But I am really interested to see what everyone else has to say.

I have a (still) broken bone in my foot from wearing stilletos everyday for a year at the high-end boutique I worked at. Yes, we were required to wear the company's shoes, but in all fairness I could have chosen the flats. However, I felt the customers were less bitchy to me when I was taller than them.

Oh my goodness gracious, this is the funniest thing I have read all day. I heart Simon Doonan more than I can possibly express (in Tim Gunn territory) and that he was felled by a man purse could not be more fitting. Keep it to two pounds honey.

I second Linda Wells...I have been trapped in innumerable items of clothing in dressing rooms that went on perfectly fine.

Slid down stairs on my knees due to poor-fitting sandals. I had a bruise on both legs straight from my knees to my toes.

I slipped on some garbage wearing a pair of Marc Jacobs wedges and shattered my ankle. i had to wear a very heavy duty cast with a walking cast on top for months. the walking cast was so think that I had to wear one slightly high heeled shoe (2.5 inches maybe) on my un-injured foot to even things out, so everybody thought I was faking. Sighhhhhhhhhh. that was embarrassing.

Does serious damage to self-esteem count?

an old roommate once fell down a flight of wide ass stairs imbedded in the ground because she was wearing giant Tron-inspired Steve Madden boots. She sprained her ankle and bitched about it for no end for a month.

@quietcal: of course, I mean stilettos, I just can't spell today.

Walked a mile in my friend's black patent stilletto ankle boots. When I got back to the apt., my feet were bloody. She was really pissed I'd bled all over her boots. It was a very cold day so I hadn't felt the pain.

Block heel boots and dark stairs in a strip club. I caught my heel on the step and felt myself fall, so I grabbed the handrail. The force of me falling combined with a pivot point meant I whipped around, full force, into the edge of the stage right next to me. Swollen, bruised lip, blood blisters on my hand and a carpet burned knee.

@flaxen_vixen: Me too. And I have literally ripped some of them off. Torn arm holes, broken zippers, popped buttons. Hmmm...maybe I need to start buying larger sizes.

Broke my baby toe on the wheel of former roommate's fake vuitton suitcase. We were dancing in dorm room and unpacking from Thanksgiving break. I was without shoes and hooked the toe on the wheel and let out an unholy scream. This is officially the stupidest injury of all time.

My favorite pair of work pants used to be these widelegged slacks with some decorative cuffs at the bottom. On several occasions (as I'm too stubborn/stupid to change my ways), I hooked a heel in those cuffs as I walked down a staircase and went flying. Worst injury was a severely scraped ankle. The pants held up great, though, even on concrete!

Thank god I'm too fat for those pants now.

Didn't Nicole Kidman break a rib from all the mad corset action filing Moulin Rouge? Or was that crazy talk?

I get stuck in things in fitting rooms all the time. I occassionally buy them. Once I got really panicky that I was going to have to cut it off of me, though. And then I found the zipper.

I've had many near-miss bustings, but none since 3rd grade when I scraped up the side of my face (which had nothing to do with fashions). I have burned my belly on rivets from jeans right out of the dryer.

surprisingly, I think the only fashion-inflicted trauma (unless perms are fair game, in which case OMG CHIA PET HAIR) I've been afflicted by is rather tame: fishnet stockings that were just tight enough that when removed, I had a spiderwebby pattern embossed on my legs for what seemed like hours.

Well, and that one time in undergrad when I fell victim to frostbite in my open-toed shoes, but that wasn't so much "fashion attacks!" as it was taking the wrong bus, being let off miles from my destiniation, and having to walk over 2 miles of unshoveled sidewalks to get to the damn theater. (If I'd taken the correct bus, open-toes would've been ok, as the total outside-walking distance would've been about 20 feet.)

Not sure if flip-flops count as "fashion," but the summer before my senior year of college, I broke my nose (and my glasses, and my heavy ol' manual camera), gave myself two black eyes and scraped all the skin off of my schnozz when my flip-flops got caught on a seatbelt as I was trying to exit a minivan in rural Idaho. For the next two weeks, I looked like I'd had the crap beaten out of me.

OMG, you guys, these stories are terrifying. All of my injuries are sex-related, not fashion-related.

Okay, I've never reeeeally had a fashion-related ER visit but I did have to tear my way out of a sweater in a J. Crew dressing room one time. Like, tear the sweater in half. I get claustrophobic!! The thing wouldn't get around my elbows so I started to thrash and then I realized what I had to do: very slowly and silently tear the damn thing in half and stuff it inside another shirt. Crisis averted; don't worry, I'm okay now.

fell down a flight of stairs - stair at a time x 12 - and broke my tailbone in front of my bf at the time. had to sit on an inflatable donut for weeks! funny now but not then.

I have a pair of clogs that always turn my ankles painfully when I wear them. But I keep wearing them anyway, because they're cute and I'm stupid.

Remember those wedge flip-flops that were popular a few years ago? I do. I fell off one. While carrying about 100 pounds of unintelligable books (studying for the bar). And I broke my foot. I had a glorious trip to NYC planned 2 weeks later where I wanted to visit Bergdoffs and purchase beautiful, beautiful shoes, but alas, I only got sympathy from the salespeople (after one look at my hideous "boot") while my friend shopped to her heart's content. I'm still bitter. And broken. My bone never healed right because I refused to wear the boot on a night out on that same NYC trip and busted my foot even more. Nice.

So, there I was, minding My Own Goddam Business while summering on the banks of the Tigres in the Cradle of Civilization... It was "Hawaiian Shirt Day" in the compound, relaxing with a case of Near-Beer after a busy night helo-ing soldiers into and out of Baghdad. The sun was bright and you could smell the sunscreen and cordite wafting in the light breeze. You know, the sort of Perfect Day that just screamed for you to take off the heavy body armour and take it easy for a bit. We were chatting away outside of our tents when the first morters hit the ground. Fortunately, only a couple of minor cuts and a deafening ringing in our ears. Oh, the perils of Fasion in a Desparate Place! Next time I'll know better. No more short-sleve shirts!

Every time I think there's no way I could love Simon Doonan any more than I already do, he does something to up the ante. LOVE HIM!

Also, if I had a dollar for every time I've been trapped inside a garment in a fitting room, I'd be able to afford that Prada thing Linda Wells got trapped in.

I fell flat on my face after tripping on a brick sidewalk in flip flops on my way to class in college. I ripped open my jeans, skinned my knee and spilled my drink (just a Coke) everywhere.

Recently the underwire in my bra broke free and skewered me in the sternum, leaving my decolletage (which, being a A cup, is nil) tragically marred.

@skinnybonejones: I'm waiting for the sex/fashion injury story.

oh, and there was that time in 4 1/2" strappy wedges that I tripped on nothing and rolled my ankle. Freakishly enough, I got up and was fine, and continued walking for the rest of the night (probably 3 miles, all told- it was summer). Then, six hours later, I come home, take off my shoes and sit down, and when I try to stand, my ankle is completly fucked. Swollen like a melon and took three coedine to take away that pain, plus not being able to walk for four days. Damn lack of insurance meant I never got to see a doc, either, because on the fifth day, I was able to hobble and figured that meant it would heal on its own.

oh, forgot to say i was wearing a black pair of jimmy stilletos.

i can't top these stories, but i do have a recent anecdote. looking for NYE dresses (black sequin) and trying to be cheap, i went to wet seal - forgetting that i have the body of a tall grown woman and not a prepubescent fifth-grader.

anyway. found one such black sequinned dress (cap-sleeved shift dress), size large (although i am a size 8), and it was indeed too short and too tight - so tight, in fact, that it got stuck as i tried to pull it off overhead and scratched the skin around my underarms. i was so worried that people in adjacent rooms might hear me struggle that i didn't really appreciate the injury or the pain at the time. but later, when i was home and changing clothes, i caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and saw huge red welts resembling cat scratches on my underarms.

i ended up paying about five times as much for a simliar dress over at banana republic (it was actually cut for someone with boobs and was cut to be a respectable length). for me, being cheap usually does not pay off in the end when it comes to fashion.

most of these stories above are why I can't even look at heels at the store...no matter HOW cute they are.

I have pterodactyl feet, so I've just had to accept that any pair of real heels (of which I have very few) is going to tear my toe-knuckles into a bloody mess the first and possibly second time I wear it.

@ thatonegirl: LOL! you made my day. Too funny!

No ER worthy stuff, but let's see....
1. Went flying down a staircase after getting the heel of my knee-high boot caught on a step, just skinned my knee from that.
2. Dislocated my right shoulder from carrying a huge fanschy-schmancy tote (because I just kept throwing stuff into it and, well, it was a huge bag, so enough said).
3. Broke my right big toe in a couple of places from cramming it into a pair of too small, too tall, MJ shoes that I was SO excited about because I bought them on super-sale at Barneys.

Fashion hurts.

I thought of another one. About 10 years ago those cuffed, wide-leg pants were all I wore. One day I caught my huge Lil' Abner shoe on the cuff and tumbled down a flight of stairs. Luckily it only resulted in a shin bruise, which can still be seen, 10 years later. The damage to my ego was all-encompassing though.

The last pair of Nikes I will ever buy rubbed two toenails off my feet, right at the beginning of the summer. It's hard to pull of sandals with nasty blood blisters where the toenails used to be.

I've also gotten stuck in clothes in dressing rooms, and ended up with scratches and scrapes from tags and zippers.

I have two.

1-I was in Macy's trying on a BCBG dress. I got the dress on only to realize the little cap sleeves were way to small for my arms. I managed to get most of the dress back over my head, but when I got to the arms I was stuck. So there I am in the dressing room stuck with my arms in the air, dress over my head (therefore unable to see), and in some pretty ghastly underwear. My choices were to yell for my friend or pull really hard and risk ripping the very sheer little sleeves. My friend came to the rescue (thank God the doors had no locks) and helped me pull the dress off.

2- I own a pair knee-high Frye boots. I paid good money for those boots. Besides being sweaty, they're not too bad. The only issue is the complete lack of tread on the sole. I have slipped many, many times but the worse happened this October. My friend came to meet me so we could go out for a few drinks. I was standing outside my building waiting when I hustled to the stairs to meet him. I got to the top of the stairs, slipped and when flying down the entire set. I put 3 holes and 4 runs in my tights and gave myself some awful rug burn. When I got outside my friend asked "Did you fall? Because I heard a really loud boom."

back in the '90s i was rocking 1 of those printed tahitian type sarongs

needless to say i got tangled in it and fell down some metal steps

my leg was so bruised and swollen i was given crutches

Flip flops. Escalator. Toenail. Blood. Owie.

The nail has yet to return.

OMFG you guys! I just broke one ankle and sprained the other on New Year's Eve due to an adorable pair of knee high, brand new Frye boots - I caught my heel in the carpet, twisted both ankles outwards, and went down - so, here I am, first day back at work since before Christmas, a cast on one leg, and a killer pain-pill prescription!!!

Oh, fun.

I developed a lipoma (non-cancerous tumor) on my lower leg triggered by a sprain from wearing heels for 18 hours straight one day (longest day ever). Test after test was done until they figured out what the weird lump on my leg was.

Also, I once wore a brand new pair of boots on a trip to NYC, where I walked around all day. My feet were one giant blister. Ugh.

tripped up subway stairs in SUPEr pointy shoes. Threw shoes away when I got home. Stabbed in boob (with blood!) by renegade underwire from bra. Threw bra away and got a bandaid. Got an abraision on shin from adorable wellies. Still own, just wear a little padding (sock or jeans) to keep from repeating. ALso, bunions from godawful toe shoes.

Sheeit, okay. One of my favorites was at this Jane party (aww, Jane!)... I was wearing a skirt as a dress, with a belt around my waist - 'cause I'm a ho - and these stacked wooden platform sandals and I was maybe a leetle drunk and the place got effing crowded and the only way to get between floors was to take this super narrow, lubed up staircase jam-packed with revelers. Sooo, midway down the staircase I slipped in a patch of rum or something and took my ass express down to the next landing, domino-effecting 4 other people. Oh my god it HURT! You know when you fall on your ass and it hurts so bad it makes you nauseous? That. I tried to pretend I was fabulous and could dance it off but had to leave within five due to searing buttpain and a geriatric lurch. My entire right cheek turned this gorgeous shade of purple and that was the day I learned that I DO have stretch marks!

I fell down stairs at a club when my stiletto got caught in a grate of the stairs. Luckily, I was coming from the VIP section so there was a bouncer at the end of the stairs and I was only a few steps away. He managed to catch me but it still resulted in a pretty big scrape on my shin. (Seriously though, what kinda club has stairs that have little holes in them?) I saw the manager later who was a friend of a friend and he sent over a bottle of tequila to ease my pain. So other than the little scar that still remains, I survived.

I had this kicky pair of red suede boots that I wore to a Christmas party where everybody, I mean everybody noticed them. I got home, and had forgotten I left the box for my fiber-optic Christmas tree in the middle of the living room. As I tripped over it, I put my hands out to stop myself, snowboarder style. I wrenched my rotator cuff and my arm was hanging loose. Had to go to emergency the next day and couldn't work out for weeks. On rainy days, it still hurts.

Gorgeous boots, though.

I'm also a victim of the heel of my shoe getting caught in the cuff of my slacks. It caused a tumble down the stairs. I also broke my big toe wearing super cute open toe shoes to a concert. I got a signed poster from the singer- it's no photo op and Versace band aid but it was personalized with "Sorry about your foot".

And I also put on a pair of jeans right out of the dryer and burnt my lady-bits. Thought I had the herps for a week or so.