Jezebel
We've spilled a lot of virtual ink on American Apparel. We've talked about its possibly sexist ads. We've talked about its pervy owner. We've dished about its lame, possibly coked out employees. But the biggest issue we have with American Apparel is that the majority of the company's designs make a normal-sized body look like two pigs fighting under a blanket. To prove this point, Slut Machine and I took videographer Alex Goldberg to a Brooklyn AA and tried on a few aggressively unflattering outfits. A caveat, in the words of dear Slut Machine: "We knew the clothes were gonna make us look like fat hookers, even though you know, I feel like I'm just an average-sized slut."
We've spilled a lot of virtual ink on American Apparel. We've talked about its [Featured song: "Pull Over" by Trina, from the album Da Baddest B***h available on iTunes.]
Earlier: American Apparel Ads: Sexy Or Sexist?
Comments
You women are brave.
What the hell? I don't think those would look good on anyone. Aggressively unflattering is right.
Ah, Jessica. You can always quote Steel Magnolias to me. Love, love, love the fashion show.
your point is people look fat in clothes if they are fat and wearing tight clothes?
Holler!
Trina rules!
And thanks for taking one for the team Jezzies.
someone caught last night's showing of steel magnolias.
@misspolandspring: What?
@misspolandspring:
This isn't Gawker, honey.
Using Trina in the soundtrack: pure awesomeness.
Will I be seein this on the BET?
@misspolandspring: Ah, no. The point was that people who are IN NO WAY POSSIBLY FAT look fat in shiny, strangly cut-out, tight, camel-toe inducing crap.
Is it wrong that this gave me an enormous boner?
@IntoAshes:
Yes.
@misspolandspring: Hey now! Did you just call them fat? Cuz if you did, that just ain't right.
Those clothes are hideous and wrong. They seem to be designed for Bozo's slutty wife.
Ha, ha! Loved it! But seriously, can anyone pull off shiny, tight, blue leggings (other than say, Kate Moss).
Thanks for the Trina, too. Haven't heard that in years.
1. love the song, Trina is a blast from that past
2. american apparel is terrible. all they do is make ugly scene kids look uglier...and we don't need that now, do we?
This maybe made my century. Ugh! See, not even people completely on the smaller side of average look good in that shizz! I knew it!
@notbetty: Agreed.
But on a side note, Gawker ain't Gawker anymore.
Holy crap that's funny! I liked the short shorts on the guy. The looks on your faces are priceless!
@misspolandspring:
Wow, how incredibly ignorant.
@IntoAshes: Very wrong unless you are Bozo the Clown. Not because Jez editors would turn on Bozo but because those clothes look like clown fetish wear.
That still shot is priceless...
I still love it. I know. Terrible. But I need AAA for AA.
@IntoAshes: @Mollyboo: Ah well, back into my pervy shame closet then!
Those clothes are seriously ugly.
@boss_lady: Worst comment of the day material. Polandspring's comment, not yours.
You too are adorable. Speaking of, more shots of Alex in teeny shorts, plz.
Thank god I'm too old and fat to care about trendy and hip clothes...just hand me a land's end and a j crew catalog and I'm outfitted for any occasion.
@jenndavo: Jesus, "TWO." No more DayQuil, dammit!
Who wears the (agreed, offensive) stuff they make?
Unitards? Neon tights? Those body suits with the stomach/back cut out?
Who, and WHERE would they wear just disgusting shit?
And to think....I was looking and dresses on AA yesterday and realized most of the selections were either way overpriced or would barely cover my normal sized ass cheeks.
Dov Charney looks like he walked of a grotesque '70s porn set and his clothes represent that too
AND they have atrocious overhead fluorescent lighting in the dressing rooms. I mean, seriously. I like to wear my lamé tubepantsonesiethongs under a soft bulb, drink in hand, thanks.
@misspolandspring: Annnnd, there's the Worst Comment of the Day!
Also, the two of you are incredibly brave to go through with this. I cannot imagine that putting on those outfits was comfortable - I'm imagining lots of contorting and swearing going on in the dressing room.
I'm not sure that even a fat hooker would wear those clothes.
Listen, I never bitch about anything. But I really can't stand American Apparel. It's primal, this hate.
You guys need to hit up Abercrombie next.
@misspolandspring: Get back to your thinspiration book and your laxatives, and leave the rest of us out of it!
Man, ya'll are brave. To even walk into one of those stores. I can't deal with the ultra hipster vibe they try to give off without feeling like I need a shower.
@misspolandspring: Someone didn't get the memo about not commenting in that way on appearance. That, and fat? Puhlease!
I am also reminded of the bombass Peaches pre-Fatherfucker. AAA XX! Check out my chrissy from behind. Word.
Who has the bruises on the legs? I bruise easily too! And I would seriously look like Jabba the Hutt's sister if I tried on those clothes.
Friendly word of advice to SM -- iron supplements!!!
Slut Machine, I want to make love to your glasses.
I actually liked the shiny purple spandexy thingies on whose-ever ass that was. Minus the green thong thingie.
Don't be shy Alex, that chartreuse lame totally brings out the package.
@unpopular: LOL. i'm old at heart, i feel your thought processes.
LOL at the facial expressions. I, too, retract my lower jaw in a painful wince when I try on American Apparel shit.
1)ohhhhh, my god. you guys are amazing. it is also worthwhile that those articles of clothing were not attractive in 1982 when they FIRST hit the scene.
2)i am pleading with the spandex gods: can we please stop with the cutout one-piece bathing suit?
It's crazy how overpriced that shit is. And most of it is so sheer that you can't NOT wear underwear underneath that stuff, yet it's so tight/funky that you can't get away with actually wearing underwear either. Makes no goddamn sense. Just like anyone buying anything but t-shirts from AA makes no goddamn sense.
This clip is both cute and brave. And the song selection was awesome.
@misspolandspring: I think the point is that AA's clothing, rather than enhancing pleasing feminine curves and making a woman look stylish, in fact make a woman look like she's been out all night performing fellatio for cash. Or I could be wrong.
@athertonmerriweather: But wait until the summer gear is out! Those shortie-shorts are high-larious.
I normally wear a size 6, and I purchased an AA shirtdress sized XL. Fuck them.