Those are some gi-normous panties, lady.

Holy Moses, that's embarrassing.

New band name: Life-Saving Knickers.

I love that she says that with all the earnest gusto of a woman who has no idea that we've all got some emergency knickers. It's kind of adorable!

my sister and i used to walk around the underpants department of the local filenes to try to find the largest size underpants we could. they were like flags of distress, calling to us.

@hortense: I prefer Horrible Ugly Women with Large Underwear, one night only at the Roxy.

A case against thongs.

My emergency underwear are big and blue. They come up too high and are made out of some sort of horrible synthetic fabric... 'bought em before I wisened up and swore off anything not made of cotton.

Plus, nylon blends will not save you in a housefire.

My emergency knickers are my period underwear. Even if I did put out a fire with them, I wouldn't be holding them up for the world to see.

I'm not sure I'd be as proud of this. They'll find my burned, charred body wearing nothing but a teensy black thong. I'm totally ok with that.

@TruculentandUnreliable: Agreed.

I feel like the fact that I put out a fire with my undies is something I would keep to myself. Like using a tampon to plug the bathtub when you just can't find the plug. Or using a coathanger to fish something out of the toilet.

I like the fact that it took three of them (her, son, nephew) had to jointly wield the awesome power of the Giant Fire-Stopping Panties.

Granny panties: Putting out flames in every possible way.

She looks like what I always imagine Hagrid's mother looks like...is that wrong?

@TruculentandUnreliable: I can't think of a thing to say, honestly.

These are what I call my Period Panties. I don't care if they get messed up, caught on fire, or skid marked.

Also, when I've run out of all underwear, I just don't wear any. Does that make me a fire hazard?

@hamsterpants:
When I read it, I was wondering how he could be her son and nephew.
Apparently it is two boys.

@Trashtastic: I think she looks like Mrs. Trunchbill, after being given some Xanax.

@luciolebizarre: I mean TrunchbUll. Excuse.

When they are that big, they leave the realm of panties (sweet, delicate, petite, tee hee) and become bloomers (indestructible sails for large ocean-going vessels).

ew, i'd also like to point out that if they were on top of the laundry pile, they were dirty.

shudder.

@luciolebizarre:
OMG! you made me choke on my brussel sprouts. That is SO TRUE! HILAR!

@titania1285: I used to the same thing, but with bras. I'd try to find one my whole head would fit into and then giggle about it. Then I grew big boobs, and I'm pretty sure it's my punishment for being an asshole of a child.

@titania1285: Maybe it was a clean laundry pile?

@titania1285: Have you ever seen a STRING thong in size 28? Scared for life.

@Kataroo_Kangaroo: We can only hope. C

@ehkca: My coworkers ask why I'm cracking up. I just don't know what to tell them now, as "granny panties" is not going to help the situiation.

@luciolebizarre: HA!

@fourinchheels: i now fear for my rump.

@Kataroo_Kangaroo: Yeah, I'm hoping that it's just a stack of stuff she hasn't put away yet. I have about a week's worth of laundry folded in the closet and not put away. Because I am lazy.

@TruculentandUnreliable: I finally finished the laundry I started 2 weeks ago. And not because I had that much to do, but because I kept putting it off. And by finished I mean the last load is sitting in the dryer, waiting for me to drag my ass upstairs and fold it. Because I am really lazy.

They were frying bread. They're going to need their own husky pants.

@ehkca: Hah-ha! Good one.

@Kataroo_Kangaroo: I try to tell myself that it could be much worse, and I could have to go to the laundrymat. Though I actually think I got more done when I didn't have a washer and dryer.

@NefariousNewt: My roommate my freshman year in college was in the dorm's laundry room once and saw my boyfriend. She twirled a pair of dirty underwear around her finger and said, "Do you want to see my period underwear?" He did not know what to say, either.

@hortense: OR "In The Knick(ers) of Time".

Underwear always look bigger off the body. And god, does her value as a human being diminish as her ass grows? Because I hate to break it to you, but an 18/20 is probably what people you know wear. Thongs aren't meant only for size 2s, either. People need to grow up and stop talking shit about other people just because of how much they weigh. It doesn't make us fatties any less valuable than anyone else.

I have big ol undies that I pretend are for emergencies only, but they're really not. They're so soft & comfy, perfect to wear to bed along with a soft t-shirt.

I just want to give her a big 'ol hug.

@LilahCello: Good point--assuming that's British sizing, that makes her a 14/16 in American sizes, which...really doesn't explain why those pants are so enormous. Is she stretching them for the camera? Why in god's name would you do that?

Actually, the more I think about this, the more I'm weirdly impressed by her. Let your period panties fly, you fucking dyke!

My emergency underwear are thongs. Once I learned the joy of no elastic digging into my ass cheek, I never looked back. The only full undies I will ever wear are for under short nighties, like bloomers.

Those granny undies are what REAL women wear! I'll take comfy cotton panties over thongs any day. Plus, they come in handy if you have to put out a raging blaze :)

Aw, I think it's awesome that she's like: "Yeah, I put out a fire with my granny panties! What's it to ya?!?" More power to you Jenny!